American Dream Denial

How come we only show the beauty

How come we don't show the horror

How come we only show the purity

How come we don't show the gore

 

We suck people in

Promising them riches

Only to enslave their bodies

With prolonged hours of toil

 

We say, "Come here to be free"

But in return you must be

A slave to our system

Read the fine print

 

America, the land of hope

The land of the brave

The land of the free

The land of pipe dreams

Anymore

Why don't you

Just leave me alone

I don't want you

Anymore

 

I'm with

Someone now

I love you

No more

 

So please

Leave me be

I don't want you

Anymore

Betrayal

Why must

All my friends

Betray me

In such cruel ways

 

Either I trust you

I tell you things

You turn your back

And tell everyone

 

Or you play

Mind games

With me

And I forgive you

 

But you keep

On doing it

Again and again

I just never learn

 

I always lose

My friendships

Because of

Their betrayal

 

Don't ask me why

That's a question for them

I'm sick of being played

It's better to have no friends

 

That's why

I never bothered

Until this year

With you

 

Now you are

The most recent friend

To have the chance

To betray me

 

And guess what

You took that chance

I never really was your friend

Was I?

 

You were mine

But not anymore

You played too many mind games

Now you're done for

 

I shouldn't trust anybody

But yet I do

Can anybody tell me why

I always fall for the trap

 

It's better to have no friends

Than friends you can't trust

Friends who don't care for you

Friends who play you

 

Friends come

And friends go

But friends will always

Betray you sooner or later

Bleeding Heart

You broke my heart, motherfucker

Now you must die

You destroyed my life

Now you must die

 

Die, die, my little Greggy

Oh, wait, you're no longer mine

You broke my heart

For the very last time

 

I left it up to you

And you blew the whistle

You just cause me pain

How can I live without you

 

I opened my mind and my body to you

You did not appreciate me

You treated me like a queen

Yet at the same time like shit

 

Someday you'll know how it feels

Maybe you already do

I let you break my heart

So that I would not break yours

Break

I give in

And you pull away

It always happens

The same old way

 

Day in, day out

That's how it goes

I thought you loved me

But there's no rose

 

Not anymore

After I give into you

No more attention

No more love

 

Complete ignoration

To my feelings

 

You're gonna pay

Don't think you can get out of it

Come here, baby

You're gonna get some, boy

 

I'm gonna break your

Puny little heart, boy

Just like you

Broke mine

 

I thought you cared for me

But it was all lies

I hope you burn in hell for this

I've been burned so many times

 

PAYBACK'S A BITCH, AIN'T IT?

Broken Promise

I'm going to tell Kyle

What went on

During the time

Our friendship was gone

 

I really hope

He doesn't hate me

After I tell him

What had enslaved me

 

I told people

What he had asked me

He asked me if he

Could have sex with me

 

Although he really didn't

He just said what if

But it's the same thing

Or would you plead the fifth

 

He said he wouldn't hate me

And I hope he won't

When I tell him of

The promise I broke

Cold

It's so cold in here

So, so cold

Will you warm me

I don't think so

 

You only care

About yourself

Are you a selfish jerk

Answer me that

 

Are you hooked on yourself

I hope you're not

So cold

Put your arms around me

 

Please warm me

Comfort me

Please, cold

So, so cold

Come Away with Me

Nothing pretty here to see

Look at me and you will see

Only dirty here to see

Look at me and you will see

 

Come into my world

And you will see

Look into my black eyes

And you will see

 

Notice my anguish

Only you can see

Recognize my pain

Only you can see

 

Come with me

And make others see

Away from this place

And make others see

Confused

What's going on here?

I don't know anymore

I'm so confused

CONFUSED!

 

I need a break

To clear my head

Need to sort things out

UGH! CONFUSED!

 

What's going on here?

I don't know anymore

People aren't always

Who they seem

 

Saying one thing

To your face

Another to your back

CONFUSED!

 

I'm so damned confused

I don't know anymore

I don't care anymore

CONFUSED!

Control

Darkness overcomes me

I feel black inside

I think you're petrified

Don't make me miss you

 

I haven't seen you in so long

But I still scare you

You are mindless around me

But that's alright

 

I control your mind

You can't stop me

No matter how hard you try

You can't stop me

 

Darkness overcomes me

I feel black inside me

I think you're petrified

Don't make me miss you

 

Who's in control

You or me

I am your hatred

I am your evil

 

You think you have control

But you don't

I control everything

Because I am what's inside

Crazy

This craziness inside me

Always manages to come out

I try to stifle it and drown it

But it bubbles to the surface

 

I am sick of feeling crazy

And pushing people away

Every time I have someone

I let the real me out

Death to the Bitch

Hey, look in the ditch

There lies a bitch

She's on her knees

Saying please, please

 

The cock she wants

She won't get

As the guy she wants

Chops off her head

 

Hey, look in the ditch

There lies a bitch

Dead as can be

Now Kyle is free

 

Now she is dead

Like we all wished

We will never again

Have to see her pissed

Deserve?

Why do you love me

Do I deserve you

Why do you want me

When no one else does

 

I treated you badly

And you apologized to me

Am I a good person

Can I make you happy

 

At first, it was just fun

Then you succumbed to your feelings

You professed your love to me

And you stole my heart away

 

You lift me up

When I am down

You wipe away my tears

When I am sad

 

You genuinely care

And I love you, too

But the question remains

Do I deserve you

Do I Matter?

Love me

Do you or

Don't you

I want the answer

 

Want me

Do you or

Don't you

I know you do

 

Why

For my body or

For my mind

I think for my body

 

I want you

But I don't

I can never have you

Unless you want me

 

It doesn't matter

What I want

All that matters

Is what you want

 

So why should I

Be friends with you

If the only needs fulfilled

Are yours

 

If I would tell you I want you

Would you say yes

Or would you say no

Do my feelings and wants matter

 

Do you care

At all for me

I care for you

But I don't know how much

 

I care for you

But I don't know for how long

It all depends on you

If you respect even a friend with benefits

Don't Be Late

My child is dying

Having been shot in the chest

Crimson everywhere

On my clothes and my hands

 

I hold him in my arms

As I dial 911

I say "Please hurry,

My child is bleeding to death."

 

They say they'll

Be on their way

It seems like

It takes hours

 

My child is having labored breathing

He is fading fast

Please hurry up

You damn ambulance

 

If my child dies

I cannot live on

If my child dies

I'll shoot myself too

 

Then you'll have two bodies

To deal with

You'll have more work

If you're late

 

So don't be late

Don't Even Try

I'm dead inside

I have no feeling

I'm so numb

I feel nothing

 

You helped me

Become like this

So please get away

Before doing more damage

 

You've been inside

But you're not welcome back

Not in my head

Not in my body

 

Don't even try

You won't get in

Don't even try

You can't get in

 

You can't get to me

I'm no longer jealous

You can't get to me

So don't even try

Dream

I dreamt of you the other night

Everything was oh so right

We were talking like old friends

But then in popped your little hen

 

She started a riot

I would not buy it

I got in her face

And you defended my place

 

I couldn't believe it

Could it actually be

That you finally came

To be with me

El Diablo

My body's

Flowing in darkness

Can't you see me

With no light

 

I'm totally

Drained now

My work here

Is done

 

There's no more

Need for me

So as I lie here

I peacefully die

Endless Waiting

Come closer

Come my way

Never mind

Please get away

 

Come here

No, get away

I want you

But you need to fray

 

Ok, I'm ready

No, I changed my mind

I'm sorry

I just need more time

 

Try all you want

Maybe you'll succeed

But you won't gain nothing

Based on greed

 

I know you love me

And I love you

But just think

If we go through

 

I may say I'm ready

Even though I'm not

Please don't ridicule me

For something that I thought

Enter Me

"Sensation washes over me,

I can't describe it"

That's what I'd love to say

But you give me no reason

 

Remember me

After I'm long gone

I'll remember you

No matter what

 

I may not be your type

But then again, what is your type

I wouldn't change myself anyway

I like the way I am

 

The man I'm with will have to like me

For who I am

The way I look

And the way I act

Every Time

Acid trip every time

That's what it feels like

Every time

Every time I think of you

 

I long for you

I know I could love you

If only I knew you

Let me in

 

Let me into your secret world

And I'll let you into mine

Let's build a secret

Of our own together

 

C'mon, we can do it

Just let me in

Let me love you

And I'll let you love me

 

Please, you break my heart

Every time you turn me down

I turned you down a couple of times too

But that was before I was into you

 

I feel for you now though

Every time I look at you

Please don't turn your back on me

I don't like to be ignored

Explain

Never wanted to be your girlfriend

You were so mistaken

Didn't have time to explain

Will you give me a chance

 

I beg of you

I know you don't like me

I just want

A chance to explain

 

To explain my intentions

You are so mistaken

Let me explain

Maybe then you'll understand

The Façade Is Over

I wear this fucking mask

Because you cannot handle me

You think you know me

But you don't know shit

 

Nobody knows me

Not the real me

What makes you think

You're so special

 

After the curtain closed

Oh, so long ago

There's been only one

Who I let in completely

 

Now there's no one

Here for me

Who I can tell

All my deepest, darkest secrets

 

Now the curtain has

Been closed completely

When it comes to trust

The stage is empty

 

The audience is full

Expecting a show

But they won't get one

Because I'm through with acting

 

The actors in my head

Have all left the building

All that's left is me

But I'm not here either

Forever

Before you slip

Into unconsciousness

I'd like to have

Another kiss

 

From your tender lips

Sensuous and brown

I long to be

In your arms

 

As you lie still

I lay my head on your chest

Listening to your heartbeat

I reminisce about the past

 

I'm sorry it had to come to this

Our love is no more

The memories of you are cherished

I will never let you perish

Forgive Me

I am so sorry

For what I did

Will you ever

Forgive me

 

I know it was wrong

But excitement

Overcame me

Please forgive me

 

I regret doing it

I wish I could

Take it back

Let's just forget it

 

My mouth is shut

From now on

Please don't hate me

Any longer

 

I want to be friends

That's all for now

I desire you no longer

Even though you're good

 

Can we please

Be friends

At least just that

I don't want to be enemies

 

Please forgive me

For I have done bad

Please talk to me

Show that we're cool

Friends

You were my friend

How could you

Betray me like this

Shit, now I'm yours

 

Paranoia controls my life

You sucked me dry

You stole my life

Forgive me, I don't know why

 

The time has come

To realize

What you are

What you've done

 

You terrorized me

Because I loved you

But you hurt me

Now I hate you

 

You stole my innocence

In my eyes

You'll see

I'm empty inside

Friendships

I'm going to my

Bad place now

To be alone

For all eternity

 

I lost my best friend

For the second and last time

I'm not going to be

Screwed over again

 

All my other "friends"

Are not really friends

It is better to

Have no friends

 

You don't get hurt that way

My friendships always fuck up

I'm giving up on having friendships

I'll never trust anyone ever again

 

It only leads to hurt and anger

HURT AND FUCKING ANGER

That's all there is

That's all that becomes of friendships

 

Never trust anyone

NO ONE

EVER

Never again

Friendship - True or False?

I wish I had someone,

Someone with who I could share

Share my joys and sorrows.

Sorrows which sometimes drive me insane.

Insane is where I practically live.

Live there I do because,

Because I have no friends to talk with.

With people I talk but,

But they are not friends.

Friends are people you can rely and depend,

Depend on and confide in are friends.

Friends are something I do not have.

Have I no friends because,

Because friends come and,

And friends go but,

But friends do,

Do not come easily for me.

Me, I am my only friends because,

Because I am the only,

Only one I can trust.

Trust always comes,

Comes with a price for me.

Me, I try to trust people but,

But I always find betrayal.

Betrayal is a word I know,

Know all too well.

Fuck This World

None of this matters

It never really mattered

Why should I try

To keep fooling myself

 

The whole fucking world

Is dead to me now

And all the people in it

I hate this goddamn place

 

I wish I could leave

And live in the past

This place has fucked me over

So bad

 

I have no friends anymore

They all left me

Just like the others

I'm leaving them now

 

I'm back to my old home

That's where I belong

I don't know why I ever left

Never again will I leave

 

I only get burned when I do

I should know better

I have been burned so many times

I have no more friends

 

And I like that just fine

Fuck You

Fuck you

I don't want you back

Never ever

Back in my life

 

You've screwed me over

For the very last time

Quit coming back

Cuz I've finally gained the power

 

I didn't even want you

The last time we fucked

I just used your sorry ass

Pathetic excuse for a man

 

I know how much

You hate me

But you won't believe

How much I hate you

 

You're not worth my time

You're not worth my energy

So fuck you

Is all you'll hear

Games

Tell me now

What does it mean

When you do

The things you do

 

You confuse me so

I just want to know

Why are you tugging

On this string to my heart

 

Back and forth

That's what you do

How am I to know

Whether it's true

 

Should I give in

And be deceived

Or stay strong

And keep going crazy

 

The shit's catching up

About to hit the fan

Unless we resolve this

Very, very soon

Goodbye Forever

Keep away from me

Never misunderstand me

 

My life is a living hell

I burn in it every day

Would you care to join me

If not, then face the other way

 

Your life'll be over soon

Within the blink of an eye

You leave me with nothing again

Look through these blackened eyes

 

All you are is

A stupid little pup

Following whoever

Will lead you

 

Your brain is gelatin

Soft and putty

Waiting to be molded

Like clay

 

You know not

Of others' feelings

All you care about

Is yourself

 

I'm glad to see

You not looking at me

I'm glad to not be

The one holding your leash

 

All you are is

A sick little pup

I don't like pervs

And I don't like dogs

 

So be on your way

I say goodbye

I'm rid of you now

I say goodbye

Hello Darkness, My Old Friend

After a decade the urge returned

I could no longer deny it

Just the sensation was enough

But I miss the release

Dull turned to sharp

With my trusty little friend

Instant gratification, so welcoming

I have returned home

Until if and when I need my next fix

Help Me

I'm to the end of my rope

I'm about to jump over the ledge

Fall to my death

There lies my freedom

 

Life is hell

As we all know

Many can handle it

I can't anymore

 

Someone help me

While I'm still here

Take me away

From the cause of my pain

 

Please help me

I don't want to die

But I will

If I have to

 

HELP ME!

Humans

Look at me

I am dirty

Do you think I'm pretty

Or do you agree with all of them

 

Nobody knows me

Not even dear old mommy

They lost me when I was still young

They'll never gain me back

 

Look at me

What do you see

Do you see a princess

Or do you only see dirt

 

You be the judge

I don't care what you think

Don't pretend to be my friend

'Cause I don't want you

 

Don't come near me

I like my solitude

Leave me in the dark

I don't need no light

 

Keep your phoniness

To yourself

I can see

Right through you

Look into the mirror

And you'll see me

I am everyone

Whether you admit it or not

 

I am what grows

Inside you and

All your friends

I AM THE EVIL

 

See my black heart

As it lies still in my chest

It hasn't been beating

Since I was born

 

This is the real me

You be the judge

Do you think

You wanna get to know me

Hurt Me, Daddy!

You use and abuse me because I let you

I didn't know what I was agreeing to

When I signed my contract with you

I didn't know how much I would hate you

 

I will forever love you

But I can't keep doing this

I worship you when you're not hurting me

But will you ever love me the same

I Don't Want You

Look into my eyes

And you will see the real me

See the hurt inside

My whole life is pain

 

Shambles is what it is

You made it this way

So much better

Without you here

 

Thought you broke my heart

But you were wrong

You made me laugh

I am so happy now

 

You make me happy

Without wanting to

What you don't see

Is that I don't want you

I Have Issues

Hiding in my head

The abuse is so blind

Am I that bad

That you have to be so unkind

 

I have issues

Issues make me go insane

Do you want my issues

Be sure to keep hold of the reins

 

I once had a friend

Who wasn't really a friend

He betrayed me

Then he came back again

 

It's better not to do anything

That was our mistake

It was fun while it lasted

But now we gotta break

 

I have issues

Issues make me go insane

Do you want my issues

Be sure to keep hold of the reins

 

Do not try to pull me out

Because I am going insane

If you try with no doubt

You will feel my pain

I'm on the Outside

I'm on the outside lookin' in

That's the way it's always been

Never felt like I belong

So I hope you'll listen to this song

 

Have you ever felt like an outcast

Well, you're not the only one who's felt that

Listenin' to Korn

Not carin' for porn

 

People think they're ignorin' me

But they're wrong

I'm the one who's ignorin' them

They don't even know what's goin' on

 

They don't like you if you're different

They don't even give you a chance

If you don't believe in what they believe

Then you never have a chance of becomin' their friend

 

Some people think they're so hot

But when you think about it, they're not

Tryin' to act real cool

End up lookin' like a fool

 

So just know this

You're not the only one

You'll really be in bliss

If you make your own fun

I Still

Why do I still let you affect me

After all this time, I thought it was over

I thought I'd moved on

But it's clear that I haven't

 

Because your words and actions

Make me think

Make me cry

Make me wonder

 

I don't know why

I wish I did

I still love you

Though I've tried not to

 

Why do I still let you affect me

Why can't I let you go

Why can't I move on

And never shed another tear for you

I Want

I want to be yours

But you won't let me in

Sometimes it seems that

I'm not good enough for you

 

I want to be yours

But you have no time for me

Everyone else

But never me

 

I want to be yours

But where do I fit

It really seems

Like you never wanted me

 

I want to be yours

But you strung me along

I was falling in love

While you were falling in hate

 

I want to be yours

But like they always say

If you truly love something, set it free

If it's meant to be, it will come back

I Will Always

I will always love you

So why don't you love me

Why don't you

Love me back

 

My heart breaks

When you turn your back

Just love me once

I won't complain

 

That's all I want

To see how you love

I may not like it

But at least I'll know

 

We'll always be friends

If you allow

I don't want to ruin it

It's up to you

 

It's almost impossible

For man and woman to be friends

One almost always

Falls for the other

 

Sometimes it works

Sometimes it doesn't

Would I risk it

I think I'd rather have a friend

Leave Me Alone

Get the fuck off of me

Get away from me

Leave me alone

I said leave me alone

 

You're such a jerk

You take whatever you want

It doesn't make you any more of a man

If you take without asking

 

I thought I knew you

But I guess I was wrong

You're not my best friend

You're my worst enemy

 

Get the fuck off of me

Get away from me

Leave me alone

Leave me alone

Let Me Go

I don't know what I'm doing

Why am I here

Do I belong

I'm so unsure

 

I don't feel right

I'm so uncomfortable

Who wants me here

Am I an intruder

 

Am I accepted

Among these strangers

Sometimes I feel

Like I'm lost

 

Are you tiring

Of me so

If you are

Please let me know

 

I don't want

You mad at me

If you are

Please let me go

 

Just let me go

Lies

You turned your back on me

You promised me you would

Be with me forever

Sitting by my deathbed

 

But now I know

That was all a lie

You ran off with that hoochie

As I began to cry

 

I sat there and wept

I waited for you

To come and comfort me

But you never came

 

How could you leave me

You said you'd love me

'Til the day you die

What happened to that

 

Why did you lie to me

I didn't deserve that

Is that what marriage is about

I thought it's about honesty

 

But I guess you're gone

And you'll never be back

I hate to say this but

Farewell, so long, Jack

The Life of a Cat

I sit around all day

What else would I do

Sometimes I run around

Just to annoy you

 

Come over here and pet me

You stupid human

I'll lick your hand

That's your reward

 

Good human

Good person

Now come here

And get your treat

Lonely Trash

This is total and utter bullshit

Why the fuck am I here

Sometimes it seems like I'm alone

So fucking alone

 

All around me, everyone

All of my friends have someone

And here I sit

All by myself

 

It seems like I am the only one

Who cares sometimes

And everyone just plays

Everyone plays me

 

The only man I care for

Couldn't care less

So here I sit

With no one to hold me

 

I am so lonely

No one to hold me

No one who actually cares for me

All they want is a lay

 

Then they ditch me

Like a piece of trash

I guess that's what I am

A goddamn piece of trash

Lost

I once had a passion for this

But that was drained from me

Oh so long ago

I couldn't care less now

I'm so bored out of my skull

This routine is killing me

Day in and day out

I need some freedom

I need some excitement

In this boring life of mine

Love/Hate

Why do you hate me

I wish you would say

Why do I love you

I wish I could say

 

I am clearly fucked up

No one knows what to do

I wanna rip my eyes out

So I can't look at you

 

The hatred I see in your eyes

Makes me want to kill you

But I can't devour you

Cuz you'll be inside me

 

I could never kill you

I love you too damn much

You don't realize how much you hurt me

But I believe you really don't care

 

How could so much love

Turn into so much hate

I wanna tear my ears off

To avoid hearing your voice

 

Or would I rather rip out your vocal cords

No, I could never do that

I would gladly hurt myself

Before ever hurting you

Marionette

My resolve is weakening

My strings becoming visible

You wish to be my puppeteer

As you wield shiny shears

 

You see me become feeble

You feel the power surge

As you tell me not to argue back

Liking nothing more than to see me fall

 

That's all you've wanted

To see me cry

To know you can still hurt me

Even though it pains you

 

I know the true reasons

You have strings, as well

Although, I no longer try to help

There is no hope for you

 

You want to pull my strings

Because you possess no control over your own

But sad news for you

Soon, you won't see my strings at all

Men

Men suck

All they wanna do is fuck

They don't care about you

They just wanna get inside you

 

They tell you they care

But in reality, they're not fair

They stiff you whenever they can

And by that, I mean literally, man

 

We pretty ourselves up

Just so they can fuck

Show me a man that doesn't play hookie

And wants something more than just a little nookie

Mistakes

Do you see

The fear in my eyes

Do you see

Me quiver and shake

 

As you advance

Your eyes turn blank

As you advance

Your hands begin to quake

 

Please have mercy

Because it's me

Please have mercy

Because you know me

 

I am your friend

Please don't hurt me

I am your friend

Please don't rape me

 

Leave me alone

And I won't tell

Leave me alone

Before you do what you'll regret

 

You'll feel sorry later

After you realize what you've done

You'll feel sorry later

After you've raped your best friend

Monster

Sideshow freak is nothing short

Of what I am

I guess that's all

I am to you

 

Always have been

Always will be

You deceived me

Stabbed me in the chest

 

I should have been smarter

And turned my back on you

But I trusted you so much

And served my heart on a platter

 

You were a monster

In disguise

You tore into my heart

And lapped up its blood

 

Why can't I learn

To never trust your kind

You gave me a lesson

And I failed miserably

 

Now you try to destroy me

What's up with that

I never thought you'd go so far

You are but only a monster

My Last Poem

Some days I wish I could take back things I've done in the past.

I wouldn't be as mentally fucked up as I am today.

On the other hand, I wouldn't be able to see the red flags and know them.

But still, I see the flags.

I know they're not yellow, green, or even pink.

I see they're red, yet I keep on a truckin'.

Because of this I have been raped,

And I have been emotionally backed into a corner for almost a whole year.

Are my legs just too short to reach the brake pedal?

Or am I just that much of a glutton for pain and anguish?

Instead of taking the recommended detour, I keep going through the roadblock and drive off the cliff on the other side.

I know it's there and it's just so alluring.

I must punish myself by pleasing others.

Never Meant to Be

Get out of my head

You stupid little fuck

I don't want you here

You are not welcome

 

So please get lost

You dirty little fuck

It wasn't meant to last

It was for right then

 

I can't fight these feelings

Feelings of hate inside

I hold for you now

All you do is take away

 

All these promises you made to me

You made in vain

You were the last one

Slipping away

 

This was never meant to be

So please get away

You stupid little fuck

It was never meant to be

Nevermore

Why do you mess with my brain like so

It's not a piece of gelatin for you to mold

If I told you I loved you, would you even care

Or would you turn around and run in fear

 

I know I am not the one for you

And you prove this to be true

Never again will we share our love

Because you won't even say "What's up"

 

I been hearing shit about you

But I don't care if it's true

Everyone here makes mistakes

And this is the price I have to pay

 

I won't apologize anymore

I am not sorry for being your whore

Say what you want about me

I really don't care, just bite me

 

I used to care but not anymore

After in my face, you closed the door

Never will you respect me too

So nevermore will I respect you

No More

You know what, bitch

Fuck you

I don't care for you

No more

 

No longer will you trick me

Into believing your lies

You're as transparent as plasma

I see right through you

 

I was once naïve

And then in denial

But that's in the past

I'm not settling for less

 

Fuck you, bitch

You think you're all that

Not all things go your way

Cuz I'm not coming back

No More Tomorrow

I wish I could die

Would you help me please

It's too late

So just help me die

 

You've never helped me before

So do me this favor

I want to die

But I don't know how

 

Nobody wants me here

I have no one

All my friends are gone

Never there for me

 

No one's ever

Been here for me

So why should I

Stick around for them

Not Over

I love you

I hate you

Why can't I

Get around you

 

I need you

I breathe you

Why can't I

Just have you

 

I'm over you

But am I really

A while from now

You'll be my envy

 

You're totally not

Good for me

But like a drug

I'm addicted

 

I can't stop

Thinking about you

Please tell me

Why that is

Ode to Travis

Everything was so much easier

When I hated your guts

I couldn't even stand

The sight of you

 

You were so ugly to me

Now you're so beautiful

I want you so much

But I'm unable to have you

 

It saddens and angers me

But I must accept it

You'll never be mine

Because you're with her

Opinions

Piss me off once

Piss me off twice

Piss me off thrice

That's just not right

 

Leave me alone

Just leave me alone

Can't you see

I wanna be alone

 

Why do you insist

On buggin' me

I told you I don't

Want you messin' with me

 

I may like Marilyn

And I may like Freddy

But that don't give you

No right to diss me

 

You diss me

I diss you back

You like country

While I like rap

 

I just so happen to think

That Mr. Krueger is da bomb

While you may think

That all he is is scum

 

Well, that's your opinion

I got my own

 

We may disagree

That don't mean we gotta fight

You shut up about yours

I'll shut up about mine

Over

I'm sick of this place

I'm sick of these people

I'm sick of your face

I will be lethal

 

This will all be over

But not soon enough

It needs to end now

Cuz I call your bluff

Pathetic Fuck

You burn your bridges as you tear open your stitches

You throw away the only thing that could help you

You cry out for help and then recede

Your lies are all that I perceive

 

As the rain pours and knocks outside

I hope you're in your fort and die

You piss and moan and whine and cry

You can only blame yourself, you chose your fate

Please!

Get away from me

Please, get away from me

I don't want you by me

No more, no more

 

Leave me alone

Please leave me alone

Can't you see

How much you scare me

 

Why must you do this

What's your reason

What did I do

To make you do this

 

You're freakin' me out

Please get away

Don't come any closer

Or I'll scream

 

Right now I'm screamin'

Inside of my head

So don't come no closer

Or you'll hear it too

 

Please don't touch me

You sicken me now

How could I have loved you

I hate you so now

 

Get away from me, please

It's so unbearable

You're driving me crazy

More than I was

 

Someone please help me

We're all alone now

Someone please help me

Before he hurts me now

 

It's happened before

But it's worse this time

Don't come so close

Keep your hands off me

 

I said "No!"

Don't you know what that means

It means get off me

Before you do what you please

 

I know you been schemin' this

For a while now

Finally puttin' it into effect

Everything's gotta go your way

 

Get off, get off, get off

Or I'm gonna tell

When you get through with me

You're gonna pay so bad

 

Your life'll be a living hell

Just wait and see

Think I'll keep quiet

Just wait and see

The Real Max

You broke my heart

Now you must die

You disappointed me

Now you must die

 

Tell me the truth

And maybe I'll spare your life

The truth about everything

And maybe I'll spare your life

 

I'm giving up on you

Before going too far

I'm forgetting about you

Before going too far

Release

I'm stuck in my head

Someone, please let me out

And please don't be cruel

When you let me run about

 

I've been stuck in here for years

I need to stretch my loins

And please don't come near me

With your filthy groins

 

You're not going to get anything

I'll scream to let you know

I'm not as quiet as you think

So you'd better let me go

 

I've been mentally fucked

Too many damn times

So don't try to climb in

And understand these rhymes

 

If you do, you'll be sorry

You won't like what you see

So while you have the chance

You'd better turn and flee

Revenge

Nobody cares what you say

Nobody cares anyway

By the way

You're gonna die today

 

You don't know what you've done

Soon you'll be shown

Before I'm through

You'll know, you'll know

 

Did you know

Nobody cares about you

Did you know

Nobody's gonna save you

 

You're all mine now

Every last bite

I'm going to enjoy this

Even if you fight

 

The more you fight

The more the merrier

Then I'll bite you

And rip into you like a terrier

 

There'll be no mercy

Sure, you gave me some

But I don't care

So for you, there'll be none

Should We Really Do This?

Taking what I can get

That's what I gotta do

Chills, chills, chills

That's what I got

 

Sometimes I think I know you

Other times I'm not sure

One minute you'll be a friend

The next you'll be a stranger

 

How well do I know you

Really, how well

Well enough to let you inside

We'll have to wait to find out

 

You make me sad

By dumping me

And then coming back

And accepting me

 

You toy with my feelings

So why do I still like you

Someone please tell me

Why I took you back

 

I promised myself I wouldn't

But look what I've done

I've taken you back

And now I'm letting you in

 

Letting you in deeper than before

Someone please tell me

Why I'm doing this

I don't even like you anymore

 

Some friendships are better left

Without taking the next step

So help me out here

Will we still be friends after

Sorry

Sorry I'm so jealous

I don't know why I care

You'll never be mine

In the mental sense

 

Sorry I'm so jealous

I know you're not mine

But I still hate having

To see you with other girls

 

Sorry I'm so jealous

I know you're just my friend

But still it tears me up inside

When we're so close yet so far

Stupid

I can't believe I was so stupid

Again, I was so stupid

But I thought you were different

I thought you actually loved me

 

Now I have confirmed the truth

You did nothing but use me

Now that you don't need me

You want nothing to do with me

 

You never cared for me

You always said you would

Never shed a tear for me

You show now, you never loved me

 

You said you would die for me

And I believed you

I believed your lies

Every time you said, "I love you"

 

How could I have been so blind

I saw the truth

And I decided not to accept it

I pushed it away

 

Now I must accept it, accept the truth

That you show so clearly now

You never meant a single caring

Word you ever said to me

Surrender

You suck

All the shit in this world

You think

You're so fucking awesome

 

You will

Die for your treachery

I will

Be the one to kill you

 

The only way

You can get out of it

Is if you die

Before I get the chance

 

You'll be so sorry

If you don't

You'd better run

Or else surrender

Tell Me Why

Why am I with him

Why me

Why me

Why does this always happen to me

 

I think I get the best

It turns out to be not

It is always

The total opposite

 

Nobody cares for me

Nobody loves me

They tell me they do

But really, they do not

 

It is so obvious

When they treat me like this

Like I'll understand

And let it pass

 

Like I'll stand aside

In the back

Like I won't get hurt

Yeah, fuckin' right

 

How stupid can people be

I don't know how much longer

I can take this shit

Maybe it'll be over soon

 

Then everything will be

Back to normal

Just the way

It's supposed to be

 

They'll get back together

Cuz he's really not over her

If he's gonna do that

I'm not giving in

 

Why am I putting

Myself through this

Through all this pain

And all this misery

 

I just want to

Go home

Go home and be alone

Forever and eternity

Thinking

Why did I ever go with you

What was I thinking

Sure, I still want to fuck you

Wait, what am I thinking

 

I let you see my body

What was I thinking

I'd let you see it again

Wait, what am I thinking

 

I ruined our friendship

What was I thinking

I wanna get back with you

Wait, what am I thinking

 

I actually liked you

What was I thinking

I'm actually jealous

Wait, what am I thinking

Trapped

You cannot

Rape me inside

I have no place

To run and hide

 

You wanna touch me

Which I like

I have no place to run

So come and follow me

 

Trap me in a corner

Have your way with me

That's the only way you'll win

The only way I'll surrender

Two Stones

I have a problem

There are two stones

They're very good stones

But yet they are bad

 

I want them both

Though I know I shouldn't

They're no good for me

They'll only hurt

 

Don't know if I can have them

I think I could

I do want them

But then again, I don't

 

I know they're bad for me

But, oh, how I want them

They'll only hurt me

But I want them

 

I want them

Those two stones

I want them very bad

I want to get hurt

Use

You try to control me

I won't allow it

I've grown stronger

And you can't stand it

 

I be myself

You are surprised

You try to beat me down

But this time, you fail

 

It drives you crazy

That I can use you too

I no longer love you

I just want to feel you

 

No need to impress you

This time around

It makes me happy

When I see you frown

 

You used me once

Then we were through

I never knew

I could use you, too

We're Through

You're no good for me

Thank god it's over

What was I thinking

To have you over

 

I'm rid of you now

I think I finally am

You won't be my first

And I'm glad of that

 

So don't look at me

With those eyes

You're so pathetic

You'll never be mine

 

Now now, not ever

Not now, not ever

 

You chew people up

And spit them out

You're such a user

Don't sit there and pout

 

What a pathetic loser

That's what you are

Just a loser

Can't you see that you are

What the Hell?

Why does this world

Have to be so damn cruel

Walkin' home one day

People givin' you the finger

 

What's with a finger

Just one little finger

That gets us riled up inside

Makes us wanna scream out loud

 

Makes us wanna rip

Those creeps all apart

And tear out their insides

'Til they can't scream no more

 

Kill! Kill! Kill!

That's what goes through my head

When someone does to me

What people like them just did

 

They don't think I'll fight back

Just 'cause I seem quiet

They don't know what's capable

There'll be hell to pay if they do

 

They'll be sorry if they find out

And cryin' for their mommas

They'll be in such pain

They'll wish they could die

 

But I won't let them die

'Cause I cannot die

They'll sit there and suffer

Like they make me suffer

 

They'll be beggin' for mercy

But that ain't what they get

They only get my anger

My hatred and my fist

 

They have no reason

To do that to me

But I have a reason

To do it to them

 

You may think the golden

Rule doesn't apply here

But it does, "Do unto others

As you wish them to you"

 

What the hell

They do that to me

So they deserve it

Ten times back

What's Goin' On?

I look up at the sky

And I can't see why

People throw their lives away

For something that just takes away

 

All this stuff is bullcrap

I can't see how they can believe that

 

You're on your own

That's the way it is

In this life

You are your only friend

 

They say we are

The future of this nation

But how can we be

If what we need is what we're missin'

 

How can we learn

When we have nowhere to turn

The school's all in debt

Really causes such a fret

 

Cuttin' classes here and there

How can we learn that way, my dear

We're supposed to expand our minds

But how can we if we don't have time

 

Life is sad

Life is bad

And when you're not lookin'

Life'll kick you in the ass

 

All this stuff is bullcrap, hey

I can't believe they can even think that way

Hating everybody 'cause the color of their skin

Why can't they just look at the person within

 

Callin' people fat

And callin' people skinny

I don't care if you hate me

This is the end of my little diddy

Who I Am

I just wanna run and hide

Away from all this shit

Don't reach inside my mind

I'll claw your sanity to shreds

 

All I do is scare people

Who wants to be next

No one wants to help

No one wants to care

 

They're all too greedy

They all misperceive

They'll never understand

What made me who I am

Why

Why do I always fuck everything up

Why am I so goddamn paranoid

Why do you make me feel like this

Why am I so confused

 

Why are you still with her

Why are you not with me

Why do you find her so special

Why can't you just be with me

 

Why must you torment me like this

Why do you want me once, that's it

Why can't you stand to look at me

Why can't you just be mine

Why the Fuck?

Die, motherfucker, die

Die, motherfucker, die

Why do I still love you?

Someone please tell me why

 

You scar my heart

I let you

You tear me apart

I let you

 

Someone please

Give me a reason

What do I do

To deserve your wrath?

 

I try to be better

But to no avail

I do not know

What is wrong with me

 

What are my faults?

Tell me, motherfucker

How can I appease you?

Make me whole again

 

Why do I miss you?

What we had was never real

You used me, motherfucker

And I still let you

 

You lift me up like the sweetest angel

Then you tear me down like a whore

Only after you're gone

Will I then see and be free

 

So die, motherfucker, die

Die, motherfucker, die

Why do I still love you?

Someone please tell me why

Wonder

I don't know

Why I'm here

Sometimes I wonder

I just wonder

 

Sometimes I wonder

Why I'm here

Why do I exist

Since you don't want me

 

Please don't

Keep me around

And keep me wondering

Why you want me

 

I have no clue

Please don't confuse me

Sometimes I

Don't want to be here

 

I feel so

Out of place

Sometimes

Around you

 

You make me feel small

And unwanted

I want to disappear

And never come back

 

I don't know

Why I'm here

Sometimes I wonder

I just wonder

The Work

There is no love, there is no hate

I am strong, you are weak

I have grown, you stay the same

I healed myself while you stagnate

 

I am happy, you are confused

I am trying, you're not capable

There is no subtext, yet you look

I have moved on while you sit stuck