Object 501: The Holder of Floccinaucinihilipilification

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. Walk up to the receptionist's counter and tap on it five times. They should look up and say to you, "Who're you here for?" Reply only with, "Never mind. It's inconsequential." Walk out the door.

If you've done everything correctly, the door will open not back to the street, but to a wasteland unlike any you have ever seen. Vast obsidian monoliths protrude from the barren, ash-covered ground. They will jut out at strange angles, and their cold blackness will contrast almost painfully with the brilliantly white sky. This land will look as if it stretches on forever, quite simply, because it does. Do not attempt to comprehend it, as you will need your wits about you for the trial ahead. It would be prudent to have brought the White King's Sword with you, as well as the Crystal of Shadows. Be wary as you traverse this alien desert, for soon you will feel as if you are being watched. When you do get this sensation, hold the Crystal of Shadows aloft and shout, "Prove to me my worthlessness!" At this point, the crystal should glow brightly, and all the colors of the landscape will reverse. The sky will be black. The ground and pillars will be white. And then, you will see them. Legions of charred, blackened skeletons will surround you.

They will leer at you with empty eye sockets, and hiss in such a way that many Seekers have reported becoming weak-kneed at the sound. It would be advisable that you hold your stance, for they will charge ten seconds after you first lay eyes on them. You must fight your hardest against this horde of undead monsters, failed Seekers all. They are all armed with swords and shields, but you will be able to slice them apart with relative ease. However, their numbers are nigh infinite. You will not prevail. You must fight to your very last breath, until you completely collapse. If you have not reached your absolute limit before you fall, the skeletal legionnaires will tear the flesh from your bones and make you one of them. However, if you succeed, one of the warriors will impale you on its sword. Impale it on yours, and everything save you and the skeleton will shatter as if the entire world were a giant piece of glass.

You must hold on to your life, for dying now on the end of this fleshless entity's sword would be a pitiful way to meet your end. Before you succumb to death, ask it the question, "Why is existence worthless?" In a voice that cannot be described in any language of this world or any other, it will explain. In agonizing detail, it will explain why and how you are worthless to the world, and how your actions and very existence will have no impact whatsoever on the universe. It will continue on, to explain why the Objects themselves are really worthless, how insignificant and futile their creation was, and how little impact their coming together will have on the whole of existence itself. On universes beyond this one, on the creators of those universes, on their universes. In a similar fashion, it will show you the utter worthlessness of Him, of the Seekers, of the Creators of the Objects, and everything you can imagine. It will render its explanation in such a way that you will feel its words echo in your mind, and what it says will be irrefutable fact. You will be infused utterly with a constant sense of futility, and nothing, not even the Objects, will be worth anything to you anymore. When the skeleton finishes, you will blackout.

You should awaken in the bed of the place you call home, with the crystal and sword still on your person. In addition, you will find in your dominant hand the hand of the skeleton that killed you. From this point forward, you will never perceive meaning in anything. However, if your life should end by your own hand, you will become a part of the skeleton legion.

The skeleton's hand is Object 501 of 2538. They are worthless, but will you still bring them together?

Object 502: The Holder of Uncertainty

Hahaha!

Tick tock tick tock...

Click clock click clock...

Ding! Ding!

You want it? I bet you do, I bet you do... It's just too bad that you won't be getting it. Never, never. They gave it to me, and I'm keeping it.

It's mine. It's always been mine, and it won't stop being mine. Don't you get it? You'll never take it from me. I'm not telling you how! Mine, mine, all mine forever!

And that means you're stuck! No clue where to go, who to ask when you need to see me, or what to do when you see me. You can't do it without someone spilling it all out for you, can you? Heck, if you saw me, I bet you wouldn't even know it!

You've lost. All the time you spent was worthless, because now you're blind, and there's nothing that can help you. Wanna try anyways? It's kinda like playing chess with no pieces! Or any clue how the other pieces are moving...

I'm coming to find you. I know who you are, you and your pathetic Seeker friends. Don't bother trying to find me before I find you. You can try running away if you want, but it won't help. Well, I mean, in the long run, it wouldn't. Actually, you could just hide out in another realm, if you understand what I mean.

But I don't suggest it.

Besides, it's not like you know what I want. I've already got what I want! You don't, though. It's the funniest part of all this; you'll never get what you want.

What you want is Object 502 of 2538. Are you certain you want it?

Object 503: The Holder of Humanity

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. Go to the front desk, and ask the worker to see "The Holder of Humanity". They will either laugh or cry. If laughter, the worker is a false one and thy doom is at hand. If tears, repeat the question. The lights will go out and you will be enshrouded in darkness. Pray they return.

If they do, you will find yourself in front of a large mirror. Observe yourself in front of the mirror. At first, it will seem normal, but as you look closer the mirror will show eyes glowing from the darkness peering at you from behind. Do not look away from the mirror or they will surely devour your soul. The mirror will continue to show you scenes; of terror, of joy, of sorrow, happening behind you. Remain steadfast and continue looking at the mirror. Finally, the image of you will begin to distort, your face will melt and reform. Your eyes will burst and hordes of cockroaches and spiders will erupt forth from your sockets. Rats will claw out of your chest, and blood will spew from your ears. These horrors will continue to occur to your mirror image, but you must remain strong, for to grow fearful now, will make these terrible things only the beginning.

When your image mouths "Let me die," shatter the glass and walk through the door behind. Inside the room will be a man in a hooded robe behind a table. Ask "Why have they forsaken us?" If he decides to acknowledge your presence, he will lay some gloves on the table and describe the story of a man. Of his purest love, of a terrible betrayal, of the corruption of his soul, and of the unspeakable acts of which he has committed. This story will stir up too many emotions inside of you and cause you to lose consciousness. When you come to, you will be home. Next to you will be the person closest to your heart, strangled to death, with a look of shock and confusion on their face. On your hands are the gloves.

Those gloves are Object 503 of 2538. There is no chance at redemption.

Object 504: The Holder of Radiation

In any city, in any country, go to any cancer center you can get yourself to. Go to the front desk and ask to speak to "The Holder of Radiation". If the worker grimaces and asks, "Are you sure you want to meet with her?" you have two options; if you answer "no", then you are free to leave, but for your sake, you ought to never seek a Holder again, because they can now sense your electromagnetic field, and you will be hunted down the instant you ask for another Holder. If you answer "yes", then the worker will escort you personally to a room marked "Authorized Personnel Only", then return to the front desk.

Close your eyes very tight; if you were to keep your eyes open, the instant the worker opened the door, you would have gone completely blind from the bright light that permeates the room. Through your closed eyelids, you will notice the light. When you walk into the room, you will feel a tingle all over your body, consisting of powerful radioactive waves. Don't linger too long, but quickly grope your way forward until you come to another door at the back of the room.

This room will be completely dark, in total contrast to the light of the previous room. You will also notice the tingle is no longer there. Do not worry about being able to see anything. Instead, ask the darkness, "How do they sense each other's presence?"

If the room starts to turn red, close your eyes and run the other way; do not worry about knocking anything over in the previous light room, but flee as far as you can from the building. The red demons will seek you out and brutalize you beyond anything you have ever known if you stay too long. However, if the room turns blue, you will be able to make out the source of the glow; a beautiful young woman, holding a small cube in her hands the size of a child's letter block. She will tell you about how they react to each other, and what it means when they meet their kin. Pay close attention, because she includes the secret of protecting oneself from gamma radiation, which is something you'll desperately need in the weeks to come, and it consists of much more than just wearing a lead vest.

Finally, she will hand over her glowing cube and fade into the darkness. I advise you to have something to wrap the cube in, because touching it with your bare hands is a very bad idea due to the powerful gamma radiation it is constantly giving off.

The cube is Object 504 of 2538. Handle it with great care.

Object 505: The Holder of Disease

Poor Seeker. You carry the worst, most damnable disease of them all; the ever-burning desire to reunite Them.

Do you believe in magic, my child?

Do you seek a cure for your illness?

Unfortunately, I can provide for you neither for these things. However, should you prove deserving, I can give you the next best thing.

When you know for certain that you are ready, go to the nearest hospital and tell the receptionist that you seek "the Final Cure". The receptionist should nod and motion for you to follow them. They will lead you to a set of chained double doors that none but the two of you seem able to see. They will unlock the chains. If at this point your heart falters, know now that this is the last chance you have to turn back with no penalty. Feel no shame in doing so, as I have no punishment in store should you realize you're not ready for my challenge. Come back once you've gained the necessary resolve to proceed.

Should you decide to proceed, know now that as soon as you cross the doors' threshold, you will instantly be infected with a powerful, incurable plague. What this plague is able to do to you depends on the actions you are about to take.

I have no long, convoluted halls filled with demons for you to trudge through. Indeed, all you'll find beyond those doors is an ordinary hospital room, empty save for a table with ten tiny glass vials resting upon it. Each vial will be filled with a clear liquid, but while they all look the same, they have very different effects when ingested.

Three of these vials are filled with a lethal poison that will kill you within minutes. Consider this the most merciful of the wrong choices you can make, as it will save you from suffering the devastating effects of the plague.

Another three vials are filled with ordinary water. With this choice, you effectively get the same results as if you'd simply walked away after entering the room; in about a day's time, the plague will take full effect, striking you with the most severe illness you've ever suffered through. You will vomit blood for hours on end. You will hardly have the strength to lift a finger. You will hallucinate the most disturbing scenes imaginable as the disease starts to attack your brain. At this point, all you can do is wait for the plague to finally take your life, though how long that will take I cannot say.

Three of the remaining four vials will have a diluted healing potion in them. This potion will reduce the strength of the plague inside you but will not remove it. Despite sounding benign, this is actually the worst choice you could make. Because the plague will always be inside you, you will suffer the most excruciating pain imaginable for the rest of your days. The potion will see to it that all manmade wounds are healed within seconds, making suicide impossible. All you can do is wait to die from natural causes, suffering every day while you do so.

The final vial, however, contains the Objects you seek; the aforementioned potion in its full strength. Not only will a single drop of this potion eradicate any trace of the plague in your body, it will also cure any physical affliction you may be suffering at the time. From this point on, the potion is yours; just be sure to use it sparingly, as the vial only holds a few drops, and I'd hate for it to run out on you when you need it most.

Choose carefully, Seeker; the minute you touch a vial, the other nine will vanish on the spot, making second-guessing worthless. Once you make a choice, you're stuck with it. However, don't think I'm leaving this all up to chance; indeed, while it will be a blind choice for an ordinary person, the perceptive Seeker will be able to spot the subtle difference that separates the Object from the imposters. Will you?

The healing potion is Object 505 of 2538. If only physical illness were all you had to worry about.

Object 506: The Holder of Redemption

This particular Object can only be attained in a place of worship - an abandoned church. The more decrepit the building the better. You must never attempt this on holy grounds that are still in use. Upon arriving, you must knock on the door and ask for "The Sentry". When you do this, after 12 minutes, it will appear as if your efforts were fruitless. Then something peculiar will happen. An elderly man with golden eyes will open the door for you.

When you meet him, his gaunt frame and inhuman eyes may unnerve you. Resist the temptation to flee, for doing so can only attract unwanted attention from that which he watches over. Instead, engage him in conversation. When he utters the words "I believe we are nearing the end," ask to visit someone who calls himself "The Holder of Redemption". The Sentry will look at you with some confusion, but then smile as if realizing what you are talking about. He will ask you to follow him, but not before offering you a chance to leave.

If you do not take this offer, he will guide you down a featureless white hallway. It will be intensely bright, almost blindly so as you continue down it. Once you reach the end of it, he will open a door and usher you inside. Do not attempt to get him to come in with you. Even if he wanted to, his duties far outweigh any modicum of comfort or security he might provide for you.

Inside will be a minuscule room with a door to the left and a door to the right. In front of you will be a skeleton, propped up hastily. It will bear two rings on its fingers, one silver and one gold. For now, go to the right door, and pass through. There, you will see a man who has committed acts so repugnant, so unimaginably depraved that they defy explanation. He is beyond comprehension at this point, let alone any "salvation" that men of the cloth might offer.

You must grab him and drag him back through the door, ignoring his pleas to stop. When you pull him through, the skeleton will rise and stab this abominable excuse for a man with his right hand. His body will rot for eternity among the stygian bowels that lay before you. Do not look upon him, no matter how much your curiosity might compel you to. His fate does not concern you.

Now you must go to the left door. There, you will find a little girl who has been traumatized in the most unimaginable ways, and slain for good measure by the wretch you have tossed into the abyss. You must pick up her fragile corpse and carry it back through the door. Upon doing this, the skeleton will approach you. It will raise its left hand, and with that you will see the girl restored to life.

Now you must ask her a question. The majority will elicit only a giggle, except for one last question: "How can they be redeemed?" Suddenly, the skeleton will come before you and begin to lash out at your body savagely. You must endure and not cry out, or else you will surely die. Should you wait long enough, the skeleton will cease delivering its punishing blows and will be reduced to mere dust.

The little girl will then go to the fresh pile of grime upon the floor and pick from it the two rings. Should you examine them, you will notice that one has an eye while the other bears a cross. She will hand them to you and guide you out of the door. You must leave at once, for should you linger you will be forced to act as another guardian of the pit.

The rings are often referred to as Sin and Hope, or Object 506 of 2538. The cycle will continue unless you give in to the madness.

Object 507: The Holder of You

You have journeyed far, Seeker. You have sought in hospitals, schools, alternate dimensions. You have mastered and been mastered. You have mutilated and been mutilated. You have seen and been seen.

Now you must find the Holder of You.

Before seeking me, it would be more than advisable to have the lens and the polishing cloth that comes with them. Without these, your quest for me will be most... perilous.

The only place you can find me is in the wintery wasteland of northern Russia. Once there, you must find any old structure dating from the Cold War period (concrete walls preferable). Once you find this structure, lean in close to it and whisper, "In Soviet Russia, the Object seeks you."

As soon as the last words leave your mouth, you will hear a rustling in the snow behind you. Whatever you do, do not turn to look at what is rustling, as it is a thing that cannot be known. It is of infinite wisdom, and to look upon it would let you know all of its knowledge, which would destroy your human brain in an instant.

At this point, if you have the lens and the polishing cloth that comes with them, count yourself lucky, as your task will be made easier, though more testing to say the least. Regardless of whether or not you have the lens, ask out loud, "What am I?" If you get no answer, run and don't look back. To look back would be a more damnable fate than that of looking upon infinite wisdom.

However, if you hear the answer "You," you may turn around (and put on the lens, if applicable) and see a reflection of you standing in the snow.

If you are not wearing the lens, then the reflection will speak of every regret in your life and you will leave unharmed, but empty-handed until you can return with the lens and cloth. If you have the lens, polish them with the cloth.

Suddenly, you will see every defining moment in your life, be it good or bad, terrifying or joyous, played out before your eyes. These will not be things you expect, but you must betray no emotion except confidence.

Then there will be a vision of you standing in the snow looking at yourself looking at you standing in the snow looking at yourself looking at you and so on into infinity.

When this happens, you must say, "There is nothing I can change."

The vision will dissolve and you will see a small mirror sitting in the snow. Looking into this you will see the Holder of You.

You are Object 507 of 2538. Be careful, for now they will call you more than ever.

Object 508: The Holder of Gum

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls herself "The Holder of Gum". The Holder will smack her lips loudly and run away. Follow her no matter what: if you lose track of her, all hope for you is lost. After what feels like countless hours of chasing after her, she will stop at the entrance of a cave. She will point at you, chuckle grimly, and disappear.

The cave will be completely dark and silent. Making any sudden sound at the wrong time would be an unfortunate and regretful mistake. You suddenly will notice luminous sprites in the cave getting brighter and brighter as you make your way down toward the heart of the cave, soon you will be blinded by their brilliance. Have in mind that as long as the sprites are on you are safe, but if the sprites become too dim then you are doomed and have no choice to quickly shout out "No! You mustn't! I want to go on!" while backing away. If the sprites don't illuminate, sprint for the entrance you came in through. Hopefully, you can remember where the entrance is, and hopefully the... ogres don't kill you. If they do, you're damned to eternal damnation in hell no matter how pure you are.

If the sprites come back on, continue walking down the cave. At the end of the cave, you will see a fireplace; the Holder will be by the fire and welcome you to sit down. She then stares at you deeply with swampy wretched eyes and you notice that her entire body is lubricating itself with a slimy substance. The Holder disappears and a repugnant, horrific creature with its insides on the outside approaches you and will lunge at you. If it touches you, even if it happens quickly, you will be paralyzed. The creature will then slowly torture you by slowly taking out your organs and making you chew on them, somehow keeping you alive and making you suffer and asking for mercy. Before the creature touches you, say, "What can I do to reassemble them?"

If said correctly, the creature will slowly seep into the flames and melt away, and it will murmur one of two simple words. If "tragedy" is the word you hear, then consider yourself doomed, for the chances of your death will increase tenfold with every new Object that you attain - but you will be allowed to leave. If "worthy" is what you hear, consider yourself honored, for you are now the new Holder, and as soon as the words leave the creature's mouth, you will feel your body slowly dissolving into a pile of mush...

You are Object 508 of 2538 - the curse that sticks the Objects together in its gooey embrace. For your willingness, you are now helpless to stop the End.

Object 509: The Holder of Waste

In any country, go to any deserted lake you can get yourself to. When you reach the water's edge, reach for a nearby clot of mud, hold it to your mouth, then ask to speak to "The Holder of Waste".

Do not put the mud back into the lake. A ripple will form at the very center of the lake, and mass amounts of bubbles will appear throughout the lake. The beasts have been awoken. Keep your eyes to the rippling while out of the water.

Do not close your eyes.

An atrocious odor will suddenly begin to ravage your nose and eyes. Do not blink. Do not shield your face. Begin to swim to the very center of the lake toward the ripple. The water will be murky and polluted, its contents impenetrable by your gaze. Float on your stomach with your face beneath the lake's surface, eyes wide. Release the following words from your lips: "Can the taint be cleansed?"

A force will begin to drag you under as you swallow copious amounts of the nasty water. The lingering stench from before will all but scorch your senses, but somehow, you will realize that you can breathe under the surface of this lake. The water is dark and muddy and its taste on your lips is all but pleasant. You will begin to recognize a specific odor: rotting flesh and human excrement, like the kind clinging to the corpses that have suddenly surrounded you.

Do not close your eyes.

Their numbers are many, as if expelled from a machine fueled by toxins. Their mouths will spew intestines, and their eye sockets will spill bile. Bloodied organic tissue will slowly leak from the backs of their skulls.

Do not close your eyes.

You will be pulled to the lake's bed, where a lone cadaver will sift through the sediment. The ability to breathe under the lake's surface has gone, and the corpse's eyes will meet yours. It will hand you a tin can, rusty, yet still gleaming from the metal it is made of. It seems impossible to open.

Kick hard to reach the surface and remove yourself from the water. They want their Object back. Out of the lake, you are safe. You shall never return.

The tin can is Object 509 of 2538. With every fiber of your being, hope that you never encounter the means of opening it.

Object 510: The Holder of Alliances

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When inside, go to the person at the counter and ask him to see the one who calls himself "The Holder of Alliances". The first time you ask, he will smirk and go into the door behind him. Do NOT follow him, do NOT leave. Remain in your position until he returns. When he does, he will have in his hands a small piece of paper. Take it from him and he will then lead you to a door you did not see originally. He will open it, lead you in, pat you on the back, and wish luck upon your unfortunate soul.

After the man closes the door, start down the hallway. It will be very dark and only the light from the door ahead of you will slightly illuminate the hall. It will seem only a few yards away, but will take EXACTLY an hour of constant walking. If you stop, even for an instant, wish that they will give you a quick, painless death. When you reach the door, walk inside to reveal a vast room with brilliant light surrounding you. A feeling of peace will overcome you, then the room will go black and you must feel your way through the room until you feel a doorknob. DO NOT TURN THE KNOB! It will unleash the beasts held within. Instead, knock exactly four times. Then, the door will open and you will see a man standing surrounded by the corpses of people you will seem to know.

Slowly, he will walk toward you. If he runs toward you, turn and run the other way, for you are not the one for this particular Object. If you are lucky enough for him to walk to you, look only at his legs until he puts his hand on your shoulder. Then your body will force you to look into his eyes. You will receive visions of all of the wars that have happened and that will ever happen. If your heart and sanity can live through this hell, you will then ask him, "Do they cause war?"

He will then tell you stories of the wars of how the world was before now. He then will tell you something in a strange tongue that you will understand, but not know the full meaning. He will then lead you to a door. Inside will be a pedestal with a treaty and a quill. Sign the treaty, take it, and roll it up. Walk through the door you entered from and you will find yourself in the mental institution or halfway house you started this journey in. Go home, and never, ever open the treaty.

This is Object 510 of 2538. With it, you will know other Seekers, but they will also know of you. Watch your back.

Object 511: The Holder of Farewell

In any city, in any country, go to any airport terminal you can get yourself to. When you reach the ticket counter, ask to visit someone who calls himself "The Holder of Farewell". Everyone nearby will immediately fall silent and turn to stare at you, their faces soft and sad. The person behind the counter will choke back tears, then print out a plane ticket and hand it to you reluctantly. The moment the ticket is in your hand, everyone else in the airport will fade away, vanishing before your eyes. While alone here, always keep the ticket within arm's reach. If you do not, you too will vanish, never to reappear.

At this point, begin wandering through the now empty airport. Your wandering may last for only a few days, but most likely it will go on for years. When you get hungry or thirsty, you can steal food and drink from the airport's many vacant stores. No one is present to stop you. If you try to leave the airport, you will discover that the world outside has been replaced by a never-ending barren parking lot, completely without vehicles or people.

Assuming the crushing loneliness does not cause you to destroy yourself by purposely walking away from the ticket, eventually, you will encounter a strange man who is slowly waving at a wall. He will react to nothing save for a single question: "How do I say goodbye?" The man will respond simply by waving faster. Hold the plane ticket in one hand and imitate the man's wave with your other. The wall will then crumble, and beyond it, you will see every human who has ever lived, huddled together in an otherwise empty void. All of them will be aging at a frighteningly rapid pace. Continue waving goodbye as everyone you know, and billions you don't, grows old and dies in front of you. Should you stop waving for even a second, you will be sucked into the void and die alongside them.

If you somehow manage to wave nonstop, without once flinching or tiring, until every human has disintegrated into nothingness, both the man and the airport will fade away. You will now be standing in your bedroom, and except for the plane ticket in your hand, the world will be just as it was before you entered the airport. It will feel good to relax in your cozy home following your exhausting journey, but after what you experienced, for the rest of your life, you will be uncomfortably aware of how fleeting that cozy home truly is.

The plane ticket is Object 511 of 2538. It is non-refundable.

Object 512: The Holder of Comparisons

In any city with a large university or college, attend a public lecture. The type of lecture is irrelevant, but lectures on more advanced subjects (such as quantum mechanics or nuclear physics) are more likely to lead one to the Holder. Listen to the lecture in its entirety; when it ends, while the rest of the audience is departing, approach the professor who was giving the lecture. When you have their attention, you must say to them, "Fascinating discussion, but may I see your comparison data?" If the professor lets out a deep breath, like you've asked an extremely piercing question, they will ask you to follow them. They will lead you toward their office or regular classroom. You are still free to go at any point during this walk, or even to make small talk, for the professor has no reason to harm you.

At the office, the professor will open a small door and gesture you to enter. Inside will be nothing more than an empty faculty office, but enter anyway. As you do, he will start to follow you in, but turn and say to the professor, "No, thank you, I will speak to the Holder of Comparison alone." They will insist on joining you, but you must stand firm and demand you go alone. When they finally relent, turn around. The office will be replaced by a dark staircase leading down. This is your last chance to escape unharmed. If you hear loud machinery from below, immediately leave the door and tell the professor "I did not realize they were busy," and run. With luck, you will not have disturbed the Holder's study. If, on the other hand, there is silence, it is safe to proceed.

Descend the stairs until you come to a long hallway. By all accounts, this will appear to be an ordinary college hallway, with postings of journals and projects on the walls, but do not pause to read them if you value your sanity. In this hallway, there are only two doors. One is always locked; do not attempt to force your way in lest you disturb the Holder. Inside the other sits a hunched, distracted figure, making manic calculations on arcane mathematical devices. Open the door, but do not enter until he acknowledges your presence. When he does, you must say with a complete casual air, "I am here to help with the Comparison, professor." Saying this will fill the man with delight, and he will immediately abandon his work to lead you across the hall, talking enthusiastically about his research the whole time. While his talk is filled with intense detail, you are not to pay attention to it, for in the next room your mind will need utter clarity and focus.

Beyond the locked door is a massive and deeply horrifying machine, so complex that there is no sure way to even describe what might operate it. The researcher will hurry you to a wall, which is covered, wall-to-wall and floor-to-ceiling, with gauges and meters to take hundreds of thousands of measurements. He will be jabbering away at this point, but you should be paying attention to this wall, for when the Holder says "Right, then, shall we?" the trial will begin. Turning from you, he will begin operating the machine, occasionally calling out for a reading from you. At first, the machine will simply be loud, and you will have plenty of time to find the reading the Holder asks for and report it back to him. However, as minutes turn into hours, and hours to days, you will have mere seconds to find each bit of data he calls for. All the while, the machine's volume will rise, from a mere mechanical rattle to the screams and wails of suffering souls, which will reach a volume that makes hearing the Holder a near-impossible feat. In addition, as you stare into the dials and displays, faces will emerge from between them, shouting at you. Sometimes they will offer advice; other times they will wail at their own errors in calculation. At any time you should fall behind, or give a wrong reading, the machine will come to a sudden stop and the Holder will place a hand on your back. With an almost-kindly tone, he will say "Oh, well, mistakes happen on first days," before pushing into the wall, where your face will join the others in a maddening lament of imperfection.

This pursuit of data will take days, but eventually, the machine will slowly wind down and the Holder will beckon you over. With a pleasant beam, he will present you with a stack of papers far thicker than even the heaviest of dissertations, instructing you to run it down for copies. Accept the papers and leave by the means you came. The report itself categorizes and analyzes every pain of every being's life, comparing them with such detail as to drive most who read it insane with the urge to compare every aspect of every little thing. The final section of the document, however, contains a mire of statistics, comparing the Universe's current condition to the time when They were reunited.

The report is Object 512 of 2538. You know He is researching. Now you must find out why.

Object 513: The Holder of the Watchers

[Found written in blood in an abandoned house.]

 

"There is no Holder of the Waters, and Object 513 is nothing. But now They will find you, as they find all who read the message. For when you know of Object 513, it knows of you. It watches you. It finds you. And there is nowhere to run."

 

[The message terminates with a bloody handprint that appeared to have slid down the wall and through the ground.

Object 514: The Holder of Pride

In any city, in a developed country, go to any homeless shelter you can get yourself to. Stride in arrogantly, and to the first staff member you find, demand to see "The Holder of Pride". The staff member will smile shyly, before offering you a bed for the night. Thrice refuse his offers, and choose a bed of your own to retire to. From this point forward, you have ten minutes to fall asleep or the staff member will return to pluck out your eyes and deposit you on the street for your arrogance.

If you should fall asleep successfully, you will wake up precisely seven minutes later. The first thing you should notice is that there are no signs of life in the shelter anymore, save for a strange wet garbled sound coming from across the hall, and a heavenly chorus singing praises from some distance away. The stonework and architecture also look heavily dilapidated.

From this point on, if the garbled sound stops before you reach the source, pause for a moment and say in a clear, authoritative tone, "They will be mind. I deserve them. None other shall claim them." If there is a muffled cackling followed, fear not, you are safe for now. If, however, there is no sound, your only hope of escape is to return to the bed from which you awoke and tear out your own eyes. Failure to do so will result in the emaciated corpses of all the homeless ones to have lived awaken in the macabre shelter, and begin to tear your flesh off strip by strip so they may have a meal, all the while taunting the foolish one who roused them with barbs strong enough to shatter the strongest psyche. If you pull the strength of will to take your own sight, you will be returned to the natural world, forever relying upon the charity of others in lieu of your lost vision.

For the lucky ones, the sound will lead you down a series of corridors that end in a baroque-looking door. Performing any other actions other than laid out here will result in the door becoming animate and devouring the person in front of it to be absorbed into the building's walls, forever a tortured observer in the surreal sub-existence that it is. Knock twice, and wait for any sound from the other side to stop, be it cackling or garbling. You will hear an elderly voice tell you to go away. Ignore it, and knock again three more times. The voice will threaten you with bodily harm. Cough twice, and open the door forcefully, swinging it in a wide arc. If enough force is put into opening the door, it will knock away an old man who will begin whimpering in pain. Ignore his pain, but take not your eyes off the old man, for he will gladly forego his agony to return it on you a thousand times worse.

The old man will ask of you your purpose here. Thrice refuse to answer him, and in return ask him precisely, "You are the Holder of Pride, am I correct?" in an imperious tone of voice. Should this tone lack sincerity, the old man will start cackling again, and you will feel numbness accelerate through your body. Looking down at this point will only cause your sanity to shatter instantly, instead of over a long period while you are confined to a void of nothingness, floating as an insubstantial ghost for the remainder of your natural lifespan.

If the man's face instead becomes welcoming, he will offer you a piece of unspecified meat. To accept is folly, as those who do are returned to the world with an insatiable hunger for the flesh of man. If you again thrice refuse his offer, he will scream at you, demanding to know why. At this point, you must say, "You do not deserve it, you no longer hold what you claim to hold." Saying this will cause panic to grip the man, and his body will begin melting. His skin will drip off, followed by his muscles, sinew, and bone, until he is nothing more than a puddle of malformed matter on the floor.

At this point, you are required to reach into the puddle, do not worry about its depth, and do not think about it too much, for it may drive a lesser man to ruin, and grasp for a piece of material. You will pull out a bracelet. If it is black, whatever god you worship is no longer on your side, and you begin to share a similar fate to the Holder. If it is as white as the driven snow, you may put on the bracelet and return to the real world, awakening safely in the bed you demanded, bracelet secure on your wrist.

This bracelet is Object 514 of 2538. The wearer of it believes he can do no wrong.

Object 515: The Holder of Heaven

In any city, in any country, go to any hospital you can get yourself to. At the front desk, ask a nurse to visit room no. 515. She will pick up a phone, dial a number, and talk to a friend or family member, chatting about who-knows-what. Do not interrupt her, or your journey ends here. Ask again for a visitation to room no. 515. She will acknowledge your presence, but will say that visiting hours are over, no matter what time it is, and escort you to an elevator. She will press a button and you will end up on the fifth floor.

"I can go no further; good luck to you, friend," the nurse will say as the elevator doors close. You can still turn back, all it takes is the push of a button, but to continue forward is what you must do: your journey is coming to a close. You will soon find yourself at room no. 515 if you continued. Open the door slowly, as to not make any sound. If there is a man visiting the patient in room 515, your death will be swift and painless at the claws of foul demons and spirits that breathed their last in this hospital, if he knows of your presence. If there is a woman, your death will be imminent after leaving the hospital, and you cannot enter the room if she is alerted. She will haunt you forever because she has your scent. If they are not alerted, but still present, leave the hospital and never return. If there is no visitor, feel free to enter.

The patient in the hospital bed will be someone you know, or, at least you think so. Do not speak their name or approach them, the beast can fool many and can kill easily. Instead, look toward the massive window until you see your reflection and the room goes dark. However, if the room stays lit, you will see the beast rise in its true form, either taking your life or allowing you to jump from the fifth story. When the room goes dark, you may turn around whenever you like. The bed and beast are now gone.

Walk forward and you should see a glowing figure in the distance. Run as fast as you can to this entity, for menacing beasts will be hot on your trail. The growling and snarling will become loud and unbearable, but you must continue moving, to be caught would be a horrible fate. As you near the figure, the beasts will leave you be.

The entity is the most beautiful of all creatures ever fathomed. Do not look away, because in an instant, it will transform into a massive, nasty being, ready to disembowel and devour you immediately. This Holder, presumed to be an angel, is mute and will not respond to any question asked or flood your mind with horrid stories of the past or future. Instead, it will pluck two feathers from either of its massive wings and it is up to you which you choose.

The wrong feather will rot in your hands, as will the angel, turning its bright eyes ruby red and its glowing skin brown with decay. You will not die, but you will return to the entrance of the hospital. Entering once more will guarantee a spot for you in hell. The other feather will retain its brilliance throughout your life and the angel will send you to the place you call home.

The angel's feather is Object 515 of 2538. With it, light will never leave your soul, and neither will the shadows it casts.

Object 516: The Holder of Disaster

In any city, in any country, go to any church or place of worship you can get yourself to. As you enter, make absolutely certain you are alone, it is vitally important. Look for a reverend, imam, etc. at the front of the building. As you make your way toward them, stretch your arms out to either side of yourself, close your eyes, and tilt your head downward. After taking thirteen steps, open your eyes and place your arms back beside yourself. If the person you were making this for is still stood there, their arms clasped and looking you directly in the eye with a deathly stare, tell them you wish to see "The Holder of Disaster". They will place an arm around you, chuckling lightly. If a church, you will be led to the belfry, if a mosque, you will go to the "Call to Prayer" tower. If, for example, you are in a church, you will be led up the spiral staircase, but as you go, you will pass no bell, you will go on for what seems like miles until you come to a balcony, upon which is a door.

Your accomplice will open the door, before beating a hasty retreat. As you peer through, should you see only darkness, turn and run as fast as you can, for should you see what comes out of the darkness, if you look for more than a second, it will cause the universe to destroy itself in a paradoxical explosion, merely due to the fact that a human being has seen the horrors contained within.

However, should you see what appears to be a corridor within a castle, step forward. Suits of armor stand motionlessly around you, holding huge lanterns, casting a haunting glow throughout the corridor. They may seem to move, but do NOT look back. Instead, keep going. You will eventually come to a throne, upon which will be an extremely thin, bearded man with empty eye sockets. In the place of his eye sockets will be pools of blood, which look as if they should be pouring from the holes they are held within. He will gently begin to tap the arm of his throne. After the fifth tap, he will stop, and the flames that lit the corridor will cease to burn. At this point, get on your hands and knees, look straight to the floor, and shout at the top of your lungs only these words: "What happens when they die?" After this, stand to your feet. Placed on the floor below you will be a goblet, in which will be some shimmering water. You will be overcome with thirst, but do not drink it, no matter how tempted you are. Instead, stare at the water. Before you, as if you are watching it on a television screen, will be played, as if recorded, every horrific tragedy in history, everything from the death of the dinosaurs, to Mount Vesuvius, to the RMS Titanic's sinking, to present-day battles in the Middle East. Everything will be in excruciating detail, and you will see the fate of every person involved. Some people tear out their eyes in sheer agony, some are scarred for life, and some go completely and utterly insane. Whatever your outcome, you must continue to watch the events take place before you, or else you will face the unimaginable pain that follows if you do not. After this is over, the water will completely vanish from view, leaving only the goblet. Suddenly, you will feel as if you have been dropped from a great height, and you will be sat in the place of worship once more, with only the goblet for company.

This goblet is Object 516 of 2538. With this, you will have unlimited knowledge of human emotion. Choose wisely how you use it, for it could be your downfall.

Object 517: The Holder of Pandemonium

In any city, in any country, go to a retirement home with the lowest number of residence in it. Go up to the front desk and ask to see a man by the name of "Mister Factions". The clerk will ask you to take a seat. Do so, but make sure you sit next to a few elderly people. Make conversation with them. Eventually, one will come and sit down next to you and ask you to come with him. Do so, and make conversation while you do, no need to be impolite. On the way past, you will meet the clerk again. She will be drenched in blood, coming from her eyes. She will be clawing at them, begging for mercy. The man will stop and look at her in pity. It isn't important if you try and console her, for her pain and frantic mind will block out all outside happenings, and any sort of physical interaction will result in her brutal and violent attack.

Follow the old man until he comes to his room. You will notice it's the only room in the hallway with a lock. The lock will be undone. The next step is very important. Before the man opens the door, shut your eyes and hold them tight, lest you, too, wish to claw out your eyes. He will take your hand and lead you into his room. Wait until you hear him say "What are your eyes closed for?", in which case you may open them. You will be in his room, which is somehow significantly bigger than the building should allow.

In the room, there will be a bed, a rocking chair, and a stool with a pillow on it. Lie on the bed. The stool is uncomfortable and the rocking chair belongs to the old man. You must converse with him. Start about whatever you wish, but the topics will always seem to lead you to the Objects and Holders. A vibe will wash over you, seemingly originating from the man. It will be the feeling that you know whatever he is saying is true, and that you have no reason to hold back. Due to the feeling, you will understand everything he is saying, and if you begin to be confused, take the time to ask him to clarify. If you do this, he will stop talking and ask to be excused.

Whether or not you finish your long conversation or he stops when you get confused, eventually, he will ask to excuse himself and you will remain in his room, lying or sitting on the bed. Within moments the clerk will appear, bloody in the doorway, and with her eyeless sockets, she will glare at you. The longer you do not move, the longer she will stare. However, you must move eventually, and she will attack you. She will be brandishing any weapon she can find.

You must fight this woman, and no matter how many times you try and kill her, she will get back up. Until you finally kill her for what seems like the hundredth time. Your knuckles will be bloody, your body will be broken, and you will be exhausted. This time, she will just lie there, and the man will come back. When he does, he will kindly tell you that you were not the man he was looking for and he will implore you to leave before he gets aggravated with you for the mess you made.

Begin to leave, but before you do, take the woman's body outside the room. The old man will close the door and you will hear him muttering to himself. Pay no attention, his role is at an end.

The woman, however, is the Holder of Pandemonium. She will get up again, turn to you, and attempt, yet again, to murder you. This time, however, before she has the chance to kill you, say to her: "Why must they be Balanced?"

Her attack will discontinue, and she will sit next to you on the floor and begin to sob. This time hug her, hold her, kiss her, and make her feel as loved as possible. Until, finally, she has the willpower to answer your question. She will give you the answer to your question. Then she will reach into her shirt and produce a small replica of her torn eye.

Keeping the model on your person will make you feel only acceptance, and understand all that is said to you.

This clay statue is Object 517 of 2538. In pandemonium there is balance.

Object 518: The Holder of Religion

In any city, in any country, go to any religious sanctuary you can get yourself to. Upon entering, find a disciple of the said religious sanctuary. When you do, ask him to speak with the man who calls himself "The Holder of Religion". After frustrating confusion and several pleas to see the Holder, the disciple will open his eyes wide with instant knowledge of what you seek and fall at your feet, weeping as if you were god sent. He will lead you to a door in the back of the sanctuary while muttering prayers in your favor to whichever god he may be pleading his case to. When you reach the door, he will open it for you and usher you in but will refuse to go further.

As you enter the room, you will see that it exists outside of the laws of physics and logic as the ceiling seems to rise forever but numerically has three floors. Directly across the rectangular floor will be a staircase. When you step on the marble floor, six syllables of chanting will ensue. It is important that you listen closely not to the music but to the foreign words of the chant, for your life's wellbeing may depend on it. After you reach the staircase, the chanting will stop. When you reach the top the disciple who led you there will appear and ask you to repeat the chant of the room. If you repeat the words correctly, he will allow you to pass. But if you chant a wrong syllable, beware, for if you do, the room will melt into an unholy darkness that causes loneliness and fear forever and you will be forever engulfed in this dark abyss always fearing for your life.

When you repeat it correctly, the disciple will dissipate and you will set foot into another chanting level of the sanctuary. As you listen and walk around the edges of the room to the other side of the room which contains another staircase, you will see paintings on the walls, paintings of every war that has broken out over religion and every misuse of their sanctity. Once again, you will have to reach the top of the stairs and repeat the six-syllable chant to the disciple and once more on the next level.

When you reach the third level of the sanctuary, you will see that the marble floor is covered in blasphemous writings and a six-syllable chanting will once again ensue as you take your first step. When you do see these writings, bow your head and repeat the chant of the room with full faith in its protection and holiness, for if you don't you will sink through the marble floor like quicksand and be enveloped in the paranoid-ridden, lonely darkness. If you make it across the marble floor of poisonous thoughts, the disciple will ask you to repeat the three six-syllable chants in a row without hesitation. If you do, he will dissipate and allow you through the door. But if you fail, you will be sucked into a dark oblivion of paranoia. However, that fate may be much better than the foul demons that the blasphemous papers will give birth to.

Upon opening the door, a light will shine. You will feel your heart race and with your heavy breathing will start the chant of the three six-syllable chants in foreign languages. No matter how loud the chant may be, do not cover your ears for if you do, the muffled chants will trigger suicidal tendencies. When you reach the center of the room, the Holder of Religion will hold out his hand in demand of silence. In this brief moment, you have the opportunity to ask him the one question to which he will respond: "Which god allowed them to be made?" He will answer you in glorious detail of a fallen god who was loved by his people that was violently cast out of his own glory. Wait for the Holder of Religion to finish and when he does, he will give you one of two things. If he gives you a leather-bound book, you will be blessed with wisdom. If he gives you a rosary, you will be blessed with protection.

The Objects he so chooses to give you will be Object 518 of 2538. It will aid you on your quest of other Objects.

Object 519: The Holder of Remorse

Is this quest enough to sustain you? Is this accumulation of curses really worthwhile? Has everything progressed perfectly, with no loss or sorrow?

Not so, for me.

I once sought, as you do now. I know, more than any other could, the burden you bear, the enormity of the actions you have taken. And in the end, it was all for nothing. What has been will be again. What has been done will be done again.

You have questioned other Holders. You have fought them in labyrinths of fire and stone and whatnot, endless battlefields and pocket universes. Your weapons and allies have multiplied beyond number. But, in the end, whether you have the blade or the card, the nectar or the needles, you will face me alone.

All I offer you is a choice. The same choice I was given. If you decide not to make it now, I won't stop you. Leave through the backdoor, and you'll find yourself back where you started. Return when you have strengthened your resolve.

You may take my Object, and continue your futile scrabbling at eternity. Rail against the inevitable. Crush those who come in your way, whether friend or foe, beloved or hated, none can or will be spared. Lose yourself in blind lust for power, like so many before. Damn the world for its own sake, until even the souls confined to the darkest pits of Tartarus weep for what it has become. Let loose evil, and let it embrace the cosmos. Watch the stars die out, and laugh as the last ones wither, and all that is left is ashes.

And then you will reunite Them.

Or, if you have any regrets at all, if you have any remorse for what you have done, any shred of humanity remaining, I can make you the next Holder. Your hands will be clean of death, and the atrocities you've committed will never have come to pass. As the next Holder, your only duty will be to reverse the damage caused by the Seeker. A small price to erase a lifetime of pain. A trifling cost to save everything.

I'm not a polygraph. The punishment for lying is the same as that of foolishness. You will have to live with the consequences of your choice.

By the time you need to find me, you'll know where and how. Any number of Objects may guide you. I have no reason to hide.

Object 519 of 2538 is a ruby wheel. No matter how anything may try, it only turns clockwise. Some things cannot be undone. What you do with the Object cannot be taken back.

Object 520: The Holder of Conformity

In any city, in any country, go to the nearest school and ask the receptionist to see the Faceless Ones. A look of surprise should play across her face, and she will get up to escort you personally.

As she leads you down the hallways, the doors on either side will begin to grow more and more shabby and ill-kept. A red glow, subtle at first, but growing more and more intense with every step, will begin to permeate the world around you. If you should be stupid enough to look into the windows of any of the classrooms along the way, your eyes will pop out from your head, your hair will be set ablaze, and your skin will melt off your bones.

Continue to follow the secretary to the end of the hallway. Here, she will open a single door, and step inside. Follow her in. Inside, there will be a classroom filled with students. Each and every one will be plagued with some horrible deformity on their faces. Noses misplaced, teeth missing, eyes dangling from sockets, skin that writhes like worms dwell beneath it, all of these horrors will confront you and more. But the most auspicious person in the bunch will not be the students, it will be the teacher. The teacher will have no eyes, no nose, no mouth, just a blank face. And before your very eyes, the skin will begin to slough off, only to be replaced by a new sheet of raw skin, again and again.

The teacher will talk, though you have no idea how. He will tell of every lesson learned by man, of every experience that should have taught humans a lesson. He will then talk of how humans never learn, how they continue to follow each other much like sheep. His voice will rise to a horrible crescendo. At this point, you should cover your ears and scream that you are different, for if you don't your eardrums will rupture, your brain boil, and your face horribly deform. Only then will you join the students sitting in the classroom for eternity. However, if you are vocal in your protestations, and the teacher is disrupted, he will reach into his desk and hand you a mask with no markings. Take this mask and leave the classroom immediately.

As you leave, you will see that all the children's faces have molted, and two dozen sheets of skin now lay on the floor. They will turn once more to watch you leave, all of them staring at you without eyes, without faces, and without pity. Your last sight before you exit will be of one final desk, your desk, should you ever have the stupidity to return.

The mask with no markings is Object 520 of 2538. May it help you blend in where you should not be seen.

Object 521: The Holder of the Debt

To gain this Object, you must have gained the coin from the Holder of Trade. And you must have been the one to gain said Object, for only you can fathom the debt that is owed.

In any city, in any country, go to any swap-shop or small business where trade is the main form of currency. When you enter, ask the store owner if you can see "The Holder of the Debt" while offering him a large cash bribe (about $1,000 should do, but it's good to have a little more just in case). The owner will look at the cash bribe, and should reply, "This is nowhere near enough." Should the man say, "This is enough. Follow me," then do, if you wish. Your life will only be measured in moments and will end in one of the most painful ways.

When he says the former, present the coin to him. He will look it over, then nod and walk out of the store. Do not follow him, for only hell's minions wait on the outside. The owner will walk back inside with an old lady, looking for a certain item. The owner will tell you to look in the backroom for it. There may not have been a backroom on the establishment, but if you go through any of the doors inside the building, you will arrive there.

Once you enter the room, let your eyes adjust to the new darkness. It is also important not to move, for the void is still making the floor you stand upon, and to move would cause you to forever hurtle through the void, suffering all that there is to see in it. You should see a dark room, filled with boxes save for an area around a small wooden table. A lone figure dressed in black will sit on one side of the table; you must take the chair on the other side. If there is no chair, then you should just sit on the ground. The Holder wants you to feel comfortable in his domain.

He shall ask you if you have "it". Tell him that you do, and reach into your pocket. You will find a small package in your pocket. Take it out and give it to him. He will greedily open it, and you will discover it is the coin. Before he can put it in his pocket, thus losing it forever, you must ask him, with as much temper in your voice as you dare to muster, "And how will this fulfill Their debt?"

He will glare at you, greed easily showing in his eyes, and tell you one sentence: "It won't, but it will fulfill yours." At this point, stand, open the nearest box, and pray you can kill the man with the item inside. Do not worry, he shall not put up a fight, but the only way to kill him is to remove his head, and you only have one chance. The wound you will inflict will begin to pour out the currency of your home country, starting with the largest amount, and the flow will steadily get larger as the worth gets smaller. As this happens, the body will shudder in a most horrendous way, as it tries to regain its lost head. Once the head is in the body's hands, it will begin to tell you of every debt that was ignored, not paid off, and all-over removed. It will tell of every single occurrence where the person needing to receive the money went to get it by force, and every excruciating detail of what they did to the person. Then, in horrifying detail, it will tell you of Their debt; when it started, how it has grown, but never of the person the debt is owed to. Most people go insane at the knowledge of Their debts, but if you can survive, the body will eventually disappear under the wealth.

At this point, the owner will wonder what happened to his "paycheck". It will not take him long to get to the room, so before he does, you must retrieve the coin. Once you get the Object, turn to the owner, who should just be entering the room. He will comment on the mass amounts of wealth, and you must only say, "This was his debt. Take what you wish, for it shall turn into yours."

Take any of the bills, and leave the building. The bill you have is Object 521 of 2538. This bill will gain you anything that is for sale in any store if you have no money, if you show it to the cashier, but at the cost of people you love the most. Do you wish for Their debt to become yours? If so, continue onward.

Object 522: The Holder of Incognito

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. Bring with you a cheap, full facemask from a craft store. Go up to the front desk and ask to speak with "the one who hides their faces". If the clerk asks what you're talking about, just leave. Come back another day.

If, however, they reach under the desk and press the security buzzer, put on your mask. Security guards will storm in, rushing this way and that. They will be looking for you. They will arrest you, take you away to a holding cell, and leave you to rot there. Your only hope will be the Holder himself. If you catch his interest, you may feel a shadow rush past you. You will now be under the protection of the Holder. Look closely, he will be there. Dressed as a security guard, and wearing the same mask as you. He will be the only one who can see you. After staring at you for a second, he will step out through a nearby door. Follow him, he's fast.

After he has led you through the complex, you will end up in a large room lit by only one dim candle. He is there, behind the candle, wearing a cloak. Don't take your eyes off him. If you do, he will become someone else, someone dear to you. That person will have a waking dream. That may not seem like much, but that dream will be of everything that follows. His thoughts will become theirs. His memories, theirs. When you see them again, they will be driven mad. Stark-raving mad. And they'll know it's your fault.

Step up to the candle. He will pass his hand through the flame. Do the same. The light will flicker up, smoke will wisp through the air. It will form into images of people doing every evil thing. He will remove his cloak and drape it around your shoulders. It flows as if it were made of the lightest fabric, but it will feel as if it were thirty pounds. It is weighted by the deceptions of the Holder. Then he will speak.

"Today you are bound. Bound to serve them. Bound to hide them. Bound as one of them. Hear them speak. Listen to the world. Allow them to be gathered only when it is time."

Ask him, "How are they being hidden now?"

He will remove his mask, and smile, and tell you his answer. Leave. Don't stay around to see him return to his original life. You won't like what you see. Take off your mask as soon as you enter the sunlight. Any time you don it thereafter, say the name of any other Holder. You will hear their thoughts. You will gain their countenance. You will know their secrets. It is your job to use that mask to keep them hidden from the world at large.

That mask is Object 522 of 2538, the Mask of the Greatest Lies. Beware: Mankind was not meant to delve into the minds of twisted beings.

Object 523: The Holder of Quintessence

In any city, in any country, make your way to a nightclub. It must be between the hours of 11:00 pm and 1:00 am, local time. Inform the bouncer outside that you have an appointment with someone called "The Holder of Quintessence". Should he smirk and make a mark on his clipboard, then I suggest you head inside and get as hammered as possible. Your life will be over within forty-five minutes, and alcohol will help dull the pain.

However, should he stare at you as if you just asked him something moronic, thank him and make your way back home. When you open your front door, you will notice that every aspect of your home, while still recognizable, will be quite different. Your walls may have changed to an awful color, while the TV might show only depictions of brutal murder. Your lights may glow with the color of blood, and do not be surprised if your pets begin having an intelligible conversation with you. Shut and lock your door behind you and sit in your favorite spot in the house. Precisely one hour from when you locked your door, you will hear a loud knock coming from it.

Do not move. Do not acknowledge that you even noticed it in any way.

Also, don't look behind you at any point. Just don't.

Your guest will let himself in. At this point, know that the Holder has judged you worthy, however, don't look at him. Not yet. If, instead, no one enters your house, then you will live out the rest of your days in this alien world. The environment outside has changed drastically, as well, and no one here likes you. You are the reason for their torture.

Once the Holder makes himself comfortable, it is safe to gaze upon him. His appearance cannot be defined using words, and for the sake of my own sanity, I will not attempt to describe him. He will sit about, not paying you any mind, and flip through the channels on your TV, eat unidentifiable food from your refrigerator, and may well murder your pet. After he has amused himself, he will lean back and make a noise akin to an elderly man clearing phlegm from his throat. Now is the time to ask: "What is He?"

If he still doesn't acknowledge you, then I suggest you attack him then and there. A hellish demise by his hands is far preferable to what would await you after he got bored and left. However, should he turn to face you, he will, in excruciating detail, tell you everything about Him; his fears, his desires, his powers, and his needs.

It is likely that the first word uttered by his alien tongue will shatter your fragile sanity, but endure. He will not stop talking until you finally succumb to madness and lay, a gibbering mess, on the floor. If the Holder is pleased by how long you lasted, then he will, in the most excruciating way possible, cleave open your skull and remove your brain. Don't worry. In your state, that will be the least of your worries.

You will awaken at exactly 2:00 AM, one day after you went to the nightclub, remembering nothing of the description of Him, but recalling with unnatural clarity every other aspect of your journey. You will be lying under your bed (I hope for your sake that your bed doesn't actually touch the floor, else the cop will be scratching their heads about this one).

Your thoughts will be whirling and it won't take you long to realize that you have an entirely new thought process; complex riddles and insolvable puzzles are as simple as the product of two and two. No concept can boggle you, and your now-alien brain will understand with absolute clarity any horror you should encounter. It is suggested that the first thing you do with your newfound intellect is find a way to get a steady supply of human brains, s it is the only substance that can now nourish you. If you have already visited the Holder of the Worm, then you will starve to death before the week is out.

Your brain is Object 523 of 2538. It alone is capable of guiding you through the process of assembling them.

Object 524: The Holder of Power

In any city, in any country, go to any courthouse you can get yourself to. At the desk should be a plump woman wearing speckled glasses. If she is not there, return another day. If she is there, inform her that you have an appointment to meet with "The Holder of Power". If she blinks and then opens her mouth as if to say something, you have come to the right place at the right time. If she does not, instantly tell her that you were mistaken and exit the building. Forever.

If she does blink, she will hand you a business card. It is black, with blood-red lettering. You must find the room with the same number that appears on the front of the card. Knock three times with your LEFT hand, then twice with your right. The door will open, revealing an office empty except for a desk and a single armchair.

When you enter, you will instantly be bound by a force unseen to you. Do not fight this, or it will crush your body until all of your bones are broken. The door will close behind you, and the lights will go out. When this happens, close your eyes and count to 137. No more, no less. Open your eyes.

The room will have changed. If it has not, you must immediately apologize and bow your head, keeping your eyes open. Your ties should be released, and you will be allowed to exit the room. If you are not released, you will be lost to time forever.

If the room has changed, you will notice only one thing: The only light is that coming from one of the drawers behind the desk. You will be moved by the same force that has you tied, and it will move you behind the desk. The drawer will begin to open, and a man will appear in the chair to your left.

When he appears, your bonds will be removed. The man will make a noise that you have never heard before. In response to this noise, you must ask one question, and one question only: "What is their true power?"

If the man does not instantly kill you, he will gesture to the drawer. Take the object inside it. It is a large box. Inside the box are three items in a line. You must not take the two next to the center item. They will provide you with the most intense pain you will ever feel, and will not stop. IF you touch one of them, you will become the man in the chair.

The Object you must take is a 9-volt battery. When it is inserted into any electrical device (it will fit, regardless of the battery type needed), it will grant the user of the device with the ability to bind any person indefinitely, at least until it is willed for them to be released. Take note, though, that great mental strength is needed to operate any device the battery powers. Overuse it, and your mind will begin to crack under the pressure, figuratively and literally.

The battery is Object 524 of 2538. Use it wisely.

Object 525: The Holder of Burning Winds

At any abandoned warehouse (even near ports), go inside. You should see at least one person still staying there. If it is an old man, you're on the right track. If you encounter a man any younger, run. Do not attempt to speak, just run, and return the next day to try again. If you see the old man, ask permission from him to see "The Holder of Burning Winds" or the "Pride of the Hot Sand". Should he lightly tip his hat or move his scarf, you're lucky, but if he gets angry and shouts at you to scram, leave at once.

If the first event happens, he will then walk toward a backdoor you won't notice to be there at all. If he deems you worthy, you'll wind up in a darker warehouse. If not, just pray for a quick death, no matter how unlikely. If you wind up in the darker warehouse, the old man will close the door behind you. Let him do it, and as soon as you put your attention to the center, you'll see a small pile of sand.

Do not touch it, just approach it. Once you're in front of it, whisper as fast as you can this sentence, "Why does the wind bear His anger?" The small sand pile will then form a face, with a small voice, and in complete and full detail tell you about the atrocities done in the past and the ones that will be done in the future. Should you manage to hold your sanity, once its speech ends, close your eyes. Once you open them again, you will notice that the small pile is gone, and a young Asian-looking man will be sitting on a bar suspended by strong cables with a katana with a broken handle in his hand, sheathed.

He will then toss it to you, smiling, then jump down, land unharmed, brush himself off, and trot away until he passes through the wall. Should try to follow him, he will reappear in front of you and poke your forehead playfully. No one knows what will happen if you follow him a third time. Pick up the katana, and run home. Stop for nothing. No one can follow you. Should you encounter the young man on the way home, simply nod to him while running. Should you pass out before reaching your home, the katana will turn against you. If you manage to get home, keep it hidden in the closet or next to its fellow blades.

Once inside, sleep. Should you wield this in front of another Holder or any Holder's minions, the young man will appear and help you through even the bleakest of situations, wielding another katana, but his is black. Don't rely on him too often, though, or he'll slash you down himself.

This is Object 525 of 2538. This blade will call forth more difficulties. Dare you try to brave them?

Object 526: The Holder of the Fetters

In any city, in any country, go to any construction site. Find any of the workers and ask them to see the foreman, saying, "I wish to break the chains." They may shrug, or they may give you a funny look, or tell you to get lost, or direct you to the foreman's trailer. If they do, move on and ask someone else. You may speak to a thousand workers or just one, but eventually, one will respond with a smile and a left fist raised in solidarity. They will say "I'll take you to the foreman," call you brother or sister, and walk off toward the center of the construction site. Follow them and don't dawdle.

As you walk into the construction site, the unfinished work, wood, concrete, steel, aluminum, or glass, will stretch on and on, impossibly, and you'll find yourselves navigating a maze of unfinished construction. The materials of the site will give way to brick and stone, marble and clay, tangled chicken wire and broken rebar, and the worker will begin running faster, racing through the corridors of the maze. As you follow, your legs will feel heavier and heavier, as if mired in mud at first, and then as if dragging a ball and chain. You must, however, keep up, even if your legs become so heavy as to be useless. Do not lose sight of the worker. Do not drift off into the myriad side corridors. There are worse things in this labyrinth than minotaurs, and though you may get lost, they will always be able to find you.

After what seems like forever, the maze will suddenly and without warning give way to an open gravel pit, perhaps a mile across. Whether you are running, walking, or dragging yourself along on bleeding fingertips, the worker will smile at you again, and say, "The foreman's down there," before turning and walking back into the maze. If you do not wish to go on, stand up straight and walk back into the maze, as well. You'll never return, but your fate in the maze may be kinder than what will happen to you if you face the Holder without resolve.

If you can steel yourself to go on, stand up and walk down into the gravel pit. The larger rocks and dirt mounds each have a set of shackles attached, some to ancient skeletons, some to men, some to women, some to children. The living victims will all beg you to release them from their torment, poor devils. Even though they bake in the sun, and die by inches, parched and starving, jagged rocks stabbing into their desiccated flesh, you must not listen to them, for even the smallest and youngest will repay your kindness most horribly, and your eventual death will come as a relief.

Keep walking, and don't stumble or trip or you'll be the next in chains. In the center of the gravel pit, on a giant stone slab, you'll find a body, ancient, desiccated, mummified by the dry winds, chained down on its back, ancient shackles around its ankles, wrists, and neck. Walk up to it, and say, "Shift change, time to clock out." Say nothing else, make no sound. Wait.

A minute or an hour or an eternity might pass, but the shackles will open and the ancient corpse will sit up, climb down from the slab, and gesture at the shackles. Don't hesitate, don't say anything, and don't try to run. Climb onto the slab, fit the ankle cuffs and the neck shackle to yourself, and the corpse will fit the wrist shackles to you. You'll be bound to the slab, just as the corpse was. Close your eyes. If you came with resolve and with purpose, you'll open your eyes and find yourself lying in the construction yard, a broken shackle attached to your left wrist.

If your heart falters, however... If you were weak and insincere in your promise to break the chains, if you stumbled in the gravel pit or didn't hold onto your purpose, or gasped or wept at the pain of those chained to the rocks, you'll never leave. You will be the next Holder, and you will stay, waiting in vain for a Seeker with the strength you lacked.

The strength I lacked.

The shackle is Object 526 of 2538. Bring them together. Grant me my oblivion.

Object 527: The Holder of Transgression

Before attempting to locate and confront the Holder of Transgression, it is vital that you have acquired the eye and the handcuffs. Your life is forfeit should you neglect to bring these Objects with you. Although not required, having the coin will make the discovery of the Holder's location a less burdening task.

 

The Holder of Transgression can be found amongst any group of wild animals that are held against their will, in groups of six or more. For this reason, it is best to make your way to any zoo you happen to find.

If you are fortunate enough to have the coin in your possession, locate the lions and request to speak to the elder lioness. When she approaches you, simply say, "I am the Seeker. I demand the location of the Holder of Transgression." Do not be forceful with your words, for lions are proud creatures and she may simply turn away and not respond. If she accepts your request, the lioness will open her mouth in a great piercing roar. Your ears may begin to bleed but do not attempt to cover them, for within her roar she will tell you the species in which the Holder of Transgression inhabits. Locate this animal and continue your task.

If you do not have the coin, you are left to simply wander about the animals until you find a group of six of the same species, huddled together in a circle, all facing inward. They do not always keep this circle and it is difficult to know when the circle will form. Once you have located the correct animal, continue your task.

Approach the circle of animals and, using the eye, look directly in the center of the circle. You will see a seventh animal, quite larger than the others, sleeping. That animal is the Holder of Transgression. Once you have identified the Holder, take the handcuffs in hand and hold them in front of you. The handcuffs will begin to heat up in your hands and it will feel as you are holding hot coals. Do not release the handcuffs, despite the smell of burning flesh and the sight of your hands in flames. The handcuffs will keep the Holder at bay and are the only Objects that can keep you alive.

The Holder will sense the handcuffs and awaken from its slumber. It will be angry and anxious to kill you for bringing this Object before him. As the Holder of Transgression writhes in his prison, growling and salivating at the sight of Seeker flesh, keep the handcuffs in front of you and ask him this one question: "How does One defy the Law?"

The Holder of Transgression's growling and gnashing will turn to crying and whimpering as it cowers and remembers the day it violated the Law. Soon, lacerations will begin appearing on its flesh and burning flames will pour from the Holder's body instead of blood. He will eventually be consumed in the flames and reduced to ash.

Remain silent and standing, still holding the handcuffs before you until the circle of animals breaks, for when this happens, a great wind will extinguish the flames on your hands and carry the ash of the Holder of Transgression to you and it will bind itself to the handcuffs, coating them in a fine white ash. Your hands will remain scarred by the handcuffs, but you will no longer feel pain. The ashes of the Holder of Transgression are Object 527 of 2538. The binding of two will seal another.

Object 528: The Holder of Wrath

In any city, in any country, go to any insane asylum you can get yourself to. Take care that it is NOT a rehabilitative mental institution or halfway house. Walk up to the front desk, declare your name, and ask to see "The Holder of Wrath". The receptionist will pick up the phone, dial a number, and say "They're here." A few more seconds will pass and she will direct you to a flight of stairs leading down. You may descend as far as you like; every floor leads to the same place.

When you enter the doorway leading to the floor of your choice, you will see only a single light, at the very end of a long hallway. Walk toward the light, but whatever you do, do not walk to the end of the hallway. Feel along the walls until you reach the third door on the left. Do not enter any other room, as you will not leave should you do so. Once you reach the third door on the left, enter and hold both your arms outstretched, palms forward. The one person who angers you the most will appear before you. You must embrace them in a loving hug and whisper into their ear, "I feel nothing but peace." Or, if you don't in five minutes, the person will disappear and you will be trapped there forever. At this point, they will hand you a small vial of blood.

The blood in the vial is Object 528 of 2538. Use it when they find you.

Object 529: The Holder of Age

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or asylum you can get yourself to...

That's how they all start out, right? At least, most of the ones I've seen. And believe me, it's quite a lot. More than most should ever see. But, as it happens, I have been around the block a few times. I, the Holder of Age, have seen many a thing that would make even Him wince.

...Who, Him? Yeah, I know Him. Good friends, we were. Fact is, I'm old enough to be His father, but don't tell Him I said that. We even tried our hand at a few of the Objects ourselves, disguising ourselves as humans. However, it didn't quite work out the way we had hoped. He escaped, rather unscathed, but as for me...

Well, I might as well start off at the beginning, where it all began. Well, alright, not THAT far back. But at least, at the part where we met Them.

It was foolish, even for Him, to try it. He had to do it, though. And, being the good friend I am, I decided to accompany Him on His trip. I saw Him enter the institution, almost laughing. He came back out, almost hardened in a sort of way. I asked him about what He did in there, and why He dragged me along with Him. He only looked at me, held up a pin covered in things I can't even begin to describe, and said, "I got one."

We began to walk, and He told me what happened. I listened, almost sick at a few parts, and actually getting sick at the point of the head talking (Being squeamish isn't really a good thing to be for a Holder, now is it? But I couldn't help it then.). When He finished, I asked Him, "Well, what do You think about all of it?" He only mumbled something about getting the others. And how could I stop Him? I mean, once He gets His mind wrapped up in something it's tough to make Him forget about it. But there was one thing I couldn't understand: It was Him we were talking about. Couldn't He just make the things He was after? I asked Him.

He looked at me, with a hint of sadness in His eyes, and began telling me a long speech. It in itself took years for him to complete, so I might as well condense it for you, in His almighty words.

"There Are Some Things That Even I Cannot Create. These Objects From The Void Are Nothing Short Of Pure Darkness, Here Even Before Me. Even Before You, Dear Friend. I Cannot Create From The Darkness, Such As Those That Come From The Darkness. Not Even The Darkness, From The Void Itself. All That Comes From There Are Out Of My Control, And That Is Why I Must Gain Them. To Keep Them From Coming Together.

You Have Not Seen The Horrors That I Have, And You Have Not Seen The Things In The Void That Not Even I Would Create. Would Not Even Think Of Creating. You Have Not Heard The Sounds I Have Heard, The Screams I Have Heard, The Pleas I Had To Ignore. The Pain I Had To Cause. No Idea, Old Friend, And Be Glad About It. No One Besides Me Should Ever Even Know Of Such Atrocities Being In Existence. And I Have To Gain Them For This Reason As Well.

But There Is One More Reason To My Need To Gain Them. An Insufferable Yearn To Be Together Bleeds From The Objects. An Unsoluable Bond Tying Them Together. And There Is One Thing That I Have Learned In My Short Travel Into That Establishment. It Is That The Only Way To Destroy Them... Is To Bring Them Together In The Place Of Their Birth. In The Void."

I was stunned. Absolutely stunned. I never heard Him talk like this before. And because I am only immortal, not timeless, I knew that I could never understand the feelings. He must be feeling: The only way to gain them is to spend what is left of our eternity in finding them. However long the eternity may be is only timed by how quickly He gains Them.

I know, I know, you may not think of Him being a Seeker of these accursed things in His time, but I can assure you that every word I speak is the solid truth. There is no doubt that there would be no end to the search for Him, but maybe there could be a... slight "delay" in His plans. After all, I am for the human race, and the risk of the whole thing going up in smoke if His plan fails, well, was too great for me to take sitting down.

So, I foolishly went after one of the Objects myself.

A random Object.

The Holder of Age's Object, to be precise.

Big. Mistake.

I think the easiest way to tell you the story of what happened there is to give you the way to get the Object. Well, MY Object now.

...

...

In only one city, in only one country, there will be only one mental institution or asylum that you can get into to get this Object. I would give you the names, but I have been here a while, and I cannot recall the information off-hand. However, I have been here a long time, so it will probably be the oldest, still-running institute around.

Once you go up to the desk, ask the person there if you can release someone that calls themselves "The Holder of Age". You must add that I have been there over my release date. The attendant will look up the information in a black, leather-bound book of substantial size. She will notice her error, and bashfully lead you into the asylum. You will happen upon room number five-hundred-and-twenty-nine. Stop here, and the attendant will continue on through the asylum. There is no need to call her back, for she will only bring trouble along with her when she returns.

Open the cell, if it is unlocked. If not, then you have come to the wrong institute, and have only a few moments to realize that I have tried you on the first try. Before you can enter, a small baby, not looking more than a year old, will crawl out. Catch me before I can escape into the halls of the asylum, for you do not wish to lose me after all that you have been through so far. Bring it back into the cell, and close the door. I will cry, and I will scream. I will curse and it will threaten you to release me. I will cause physical harm as well as emotional and mental. There is only one thing to sate the rage I have: Ask me "How long must They be together for it to happen?"

I will stop abruptly, sit down, and tell you of a story of the first time that They have been brought together, how in a matter of sickening moments all was obliterated in the most horrendous manner ever conceived, and how in that moment, They were separated again, longing to be together once again.

I will then offer you a choice: Replace me as the Holder of Age, and avoid what happens when They come together, or to leave now, and never get the Object you seek. Do not fall for my trick, and instead kill me. I will instantly turn into a fine sand, which you must collect somehow, and escape the asylum with.

This sand is Object 529 of 2538. As the sand runs, so too does your age. Make sure it doesn't run out anytime soon.

...

...

Well, I guess you can imagine what I chose. I became the Holder, to try and stop Him from getting the Objects. And I don't know why I didn't just kill him and keep the sand to myself, but I have made my choice, and here I am now. The infant in the cell, waiting to escape.

I have told you all I know. Now you must do what I could not, and keep Him from getting Them. Quickly now, Time's a wasting.

Object 530: The Holder of Motion

Seeker, turn around right now if you do not have at least the Torch of Truth embedded firm and deep behind your eyes. This is the reason it lies dormant if you have initially collected it. The Objects seek Their companions, and they will stop at nothing to reunite.

By now, dear Seeker, you will realize that you are one of many suspected to be Him.

You have been chased across continents, visited halfway houses, entered realms never meant to be seen by human eyes, and undergone transformations that have rendered you completely unrecognizable to your former life.

The fact that you didn't expect it makes no different to the Holders; you were chosen for this long before you even knew you existed as a glimmer in your parents' eye.

You have been confused about whether or not the Objects belong together; some are telling you not to, and some are urging you to. You know that destroying them all, in a sense, brings them together, so that's out of the question.

You will need to take several Objects with you for this; know, however, that failing this task means that every Object you bring will fall into the hands of those who mean to bring them together, so these words must be heeded to the highest of your priority.

First of all, a shield will help tremendously. Take it along. Bonus if it has an emblem on it.

Many of the Objects are weapons; I leave your choice of weapon up to you. Bring a sword, a dagger, a gun, or perhaps something else entirely; the delete key is particularly effective, though it has been known to fail to delete something entirely.

Other charms of protection may do you some good. A cloak or a mask would come in handy.

If you possess some of the darker, more evil Objects, take them along. Some freezing chains, any diseases you may have contracted, or keys and locks as fingers that you may have, will do wonders for how difficult, or easy, this task will be for you. Possessing genitalia, or even a body that doesn't belong to you will possibly determine whether or not you survive.

Objects that possess other functions, such as mirrors, clocks, lighters, tuning forks, marbles, or burning cross shards will be of great help. If you're sitting on a throne, this is one of many times you must address your Legion.

Bring your Objects close by and go to what can pass for a safe place. If you have a deadly pet, ask her to come along. You will need her to fight off those who are chasing you.

When you are as prepared as you can be, close your eyes and focus on the Torch of Truth's handle, buried deep in your subconscious mind. Tell it that you are prepared to visit the Holder of Motion. If it ignites, do not rejoice; keep your emotions firm and steady, for if you feel joy at meeting this Holder, the torch within you will burn your body to dust and all your preparation will have been for naught.

Open your eyes. You will be in a burlap bag, being carried to a place you don't know. Do not struggle to escape, lest you annoy the ones carrying you. Most of your Objects are safe on your person, so don't worry. Your pet did what she could, but there is every likelihood that these people killed her. If they didn't, she will be unconscious and in the bag with you, but don't count on it.

When the bag is dropped and opens, you will be in a wooden shack. The instant you see the bag open, leap out of it, brandishing your shield and any weapons you brought along. Do not allow yourself to look at these creatures for even a second; you do not want to transform into one of them just by gazing upon their forms. Waste every creature you see; slice it to pieces, delete it, shoot it, do whatever you can to make sure these creatures do not survive your wrath. They can be stunned by the vibrations of the tuning fork. Your pet will hear the commotion and wake up, so if she comes to your side to help you fight, consider yourself lucky.

There will be thousands, perhaps millions; and even then, more will still come. A tiny portion of the true Legion has been alerted to your presence; the numbers that you must fight are but a pawn on the chessboard.

After an eternity of fighting, a young girl will scream. If you have the tuning fork, you will note that it will vibrate in resonance with her voice; do not look at it while this happens.

Before you know it, she will be in front of you, crying; she will ask you, "Why do you collect them?"

And you must answer, "Because you need me to."

She will scream out in pain as her heart explodes. Do not look away from this, because that will resurrect every creature you have killed on your way to visit the Holder. There will be a ladder rung protruding from the cavity in her chest. Take it.

The rung is Object 530 of 2538. Do not look for the ladder unless you are bringing them together.

Object 531: The Holder of Being

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. Once there, ask the staff member in front of the desk to take you to "The Holder of Being". He will look at you with sorrow and tell you that the Holder has long been away. Ignore him, and continue asking this. The staff member will only look at you with more sadness, and will begin a long, slow moan. Do not stop asking the question; if you do, the moan will cut into your soul and leave your body as nothing more than an empty spiritless husk. Eventually, the moaning will stop, and the staff member will look up at you and clasp your hands. The room will fall into darkness. During this time, you must speak nothing, move nothing, and think only of yourself, your shape, your form. If you do not, your soul shall be lost forever in a sea of chaos.

Eventually, light will appear, and you will see a small lantern embedded into a post on the ground with a man standing behind it. You may look at the man's face, but do not look around the room, or else you will suffer like no one else ever has. The man does not have a face, only a mass of gray, and responds to nothing other than the question, "What made them what they are?"

Once the man hears this, a twisted, horrible face forms upon the man, and he begins screaming, whispering, and muttering. He speaks of loss of self, of nothingness within a man's heart, and of the life within stopping, leaving nothing but a cold dark fate. You may hear sobs from behind you as he is recounting this. Do NOT turn around, or you will see yourself and forever be affixed to that spot, watching yourself cry. Once he is done, his face reforms into nothing, and he holds a mask out in one of his hands. Take it in both hands, and clutch it close to your chest.

The mask is Object 531 of 2538. Your being is now changed irrevocably by what you have seen. Only by looking through the mask can you see their true essence, what they once were.

Object 532: The Holder of Eyes

Oh, you wretched waste of flesh. I have warned you so many times to turn back. But, still, you walk on blindly. Very well, then; I will lead you to others that might quite literally help you see the errors of your ways. If you wish to proceed, know this: This involves none of the usual sites. There are no damnable institutions here, save for an optometrist's office. It is never immediately evident, but it is in every city. You need only look for the great, red eye on the door.

Watch for shadowy figures behind you before you knock. Should you see anything of that nature, depart for lands far away from civilization, for they will look for you with the sunken and unholy pits that were once their eyes. But if you do not see any, be sure to knock exactly three times upon the door. You will be let in by a woman wearing a white coat and a pair of blue sunglasses. She will tell you that her name is Emily. Do not engage her in conversation, for she has no ears to do so. They have long since been torn off; the flaps you see are mere prosthetics. She did not heed my words. Instead, simply motion to the door and follow her inside.

She will proceed to lead you down a large corridor. All the doors will appear as though they have been painted onto the walls. Appearances, you will soon find, are always deceiving within these confines. She will lead you to the third door from the end on the right side. It will be a piercing white, with the same red eye motif as the entrance. Emily will then turn to you, as if to say something. It is at this point that you must gouge her eyes out. She will not feel any pain, nor will she struggle. She is entirely beyond any of our senses now.

If Emily smiles before she begins to drop, you will have no choice but to flee in whatever direction she has landed. For if you decide to enter the room anyway, those pitiful blind souls that now dwell within it will sense the possibility of new sight. And they will experiment upon your fragile flesh in ways I cannot begin to describe, for six days and six nights, until you are as Emily is now. If she does not do this, then all is as it should be. You may enter the room she led you to without fear of taking her place. A small girl will be sitting at a tea party in the far-left corner of the room. Her eyes are long gone, replaced by small spherical mirrors. You must, at this point, say four words: "Molly, I see you."

If she trusts you, she will tell you to "Please wait." At that point, she will remove her mirror-eyes and place them in your left palm. If she does not, she will simply say, "Get out." Whatever the case may be, you must tell her the following: "Thank you, Molly." Depart from the building the same way you came, and do not look back for any reason. The eyes are Object 532 of 2538. They will let you see where the remaining Objects are. But be warned, some things were never meant to be glimpsed by mortal eyes.

Object 533: The Holder of Mockery

Thinking of your most humiliating memory, walk into any mental hospital in any city that is north of Albany, New York. In the waiting room, there should be a pimply teenage boy in thick glasses that distort his eyes. If he is not there, you could well be relieved, as your death will be quick and painless. If the boy is there, however, don't pay too much attention to his eyes; if you do, you will realize they are simply an illusion, and he will not be pleased.

He will see you at once. You have to act confident, no matter how awkward you may begin to feel under his gaze. If you pass his test, he will grin, showing his braces and buck teeth, and hurry over to you. You have to trip him before he catches your arm. As he hits the floor, you must ask him if he is used to mockery. His answer will vary, but he will say a number. That is the room number you must find. Grab a pen out of the boy's pocket and go find that room.

Once you reach the room, you will find it unlocked and seemingly empty. Walk to the wall opposite you and write the phrase "uR PHaLureE", capitalized in exactly that manner, and turn around. A figure will be standing behind you. She will hold out one hand to take the pen.

Do not respond. Do nothing at all. The shade will grow annoyed. If she points at you with her left hand, you will spend an eternity in agony, and you would be better off driving the pen through your own heart. If she points with her right hand, you will lose any will to live. You will survive for a thousand years without aging, but with finding no emotion or meaning in life.

Your only chance is if the shade grabs you by the shoulders. Once again, do not react. Let her shake you and push you around, no matter what feelings may grab you or what taunts you may hear. It is a test.

After a while, the shade will release you, the door will open, and she will give you the chance to leave. Do nothing or the rest of your life will be filled with endless anger and rage at a wrong done to you that will always be just beyond your memories.

If you remain with her, the door will shut and the shade will turn to you and take off the hood she is wearing. No matter what her face looks like, you must not react. She will smirk and ask you if you think you will succeed.

"I will, regardless of pain," must be your reply. If she senses that you are lying, she will rip you to shreds, but you will retain your mind enough to feel the agony. If you are strong enough, she will nod and step back. At this point, give her the pen and say that you can't return it yourself. She will stick the pen through her long hair, turn around, and strike you in the face. Hopefully, this will knock you out.

You will awaken to find yourself sitting on the steps of your old high school, clutching a diary. Soon, you will find that all your worst and most humiliating secrets are common knowledge. However, you are lucky, since that diary is Object 533 of 2538. It holds the secrets of your worst human enemy, your dearest friend, and the most powerful person in the world. What you do with that knowledge is up to you.

Object 534: The Holder of Cycle

Seeker, if you've managed to make it this far, you should have noticed by now a certain theme that resurfaces in several of the Holders' instructions. If you've been paying close attention, you'll have realized that the Objects have been brought together at least once before, if not more than that. Yet, look around you. The world looks no worse for wear, right?

Hopefully, you've realized what this means.

Go ahead and bring them together. Wreak havoc as you see fit. But somehow, inevitably, the natural order of the universe will right itself. All the damage you've done will be reversed, and the world will go right back to the way it should be. Sure, you've got your temporary gratification, but in the long run, will it really make any sort of impact? You'll die, the universe will suffer for a few millennia, and then something will happen that'll make it all go away. The suffering will end, peace will return, and the Objects will be separated once more.

And then, it'll start all over again.

Think of it; is it really worth damning yourself and everyone and everything you hold dear, just to accomplish a task that, in the end, will reap absolutely no rewards? Too late will you realize that the prize at the end of the road was nothing but a cheap illusion, a trick of your own mind. Despite your "achievement", in the end, you'll just become another forgotten name, lost to the unforgiving tides of time.

That being said, do you truly believe that you'll end the cycle? Will your reunion of the Objects truly be the last? Can you do it in such a way that the universal balance, to this point unbreakable, will be rendered unrepairable?

I certainly hope so, for only to one who is truly convinced that they will be the one to bring about the final reunion will I relinquish Object 534 of 2538, a broken steering wheel. Just remember: being convinced you'll break the eternal cycle and actually doing it are two entirely different things.

Object 535: The Holder of Banishment

In any city, in any country, you might find an asylum that wasn't there before. Enter it, for it may be your only chance as a Seeker to do so. Look in the front lobby for the concierge. If there isn't one, today is not your day to find this Object, and you must leave the asylum forever, never to try again in this town or the next. If there is one, do not take any action until she lets you. If she greets you first, it is a bad sign. You are fated to die on this very day.

If, however, she lets you make the first move, greet her, as she might have greeted you. She will ask you why you are here. Say nothing but, "The Holder of Banishment." Pray that she will weep for you. If she does, you will know that she knows of what has become of your quest, and it might be successful in the end. If she does not weep, you know your last days on this earth will be the darkest days you will have seen. Your quest will never fully come to an end if she smiles.

Follow her outside of the asylum to a graveyard if you have made it this far. If only the asylum vanishes, you have done everything right. If the concierge also vanishes, you will forget ever setting foot into the asylum, and will head home as if nothing ever happened. Once you both make it into the graveyard, she will point with a bony finger to a shade of the Holder of Banishment. Go to the shade. It will motion you to follow. If you have led a good life so far, please move in the opposite direction she motions you to go. If your life has been purely bad, continue with the shade. If you were honest about this, your decision will lead you to a dark forest, infested with either the darkest creatures you have seen, or the forest will be entirely hallowed and empty, void of life except for the trees themselves, depending on how you lived before you became a Seeker.

In the center of the forest will be a large tree. The tree is the true Holder of Banishment, and will have many upward roots. Carved in the tree is the Language. Stealing so much as a simple glimpse at it will result in a severe penalty, different for each Seeker. If you do not have the knife, there will be a strange-looking cutting tool on the ground. Cut out a piece of root from the tree. If you have the knife, you will notice that the roots from the tree have made a small stain on it, something that nothing else could do to the knife before. with the stained part of your tool, cut out a pentagram on either wrist and lay the root on it. You will feel as if every cell in your body is being ripped and displaced, but when you regain consciousness you will be back where you started, with a root-lined pentagram that can banish anyone to heaven or hell, at the Holder's whim. You will find yourself, however, unable to banish yourself. When you die, you will become the next Holder, as well as part of the tree, and your shade will be sent out to guide the next soul.

You are now part of Object 535 of 2538. Don't abuse your power.

Object 536: The Holder of Self-Control

Before you begin, it is suggested that you be nearing the end of your quest, probably after meeting more than five hundred other Holders. If you attempt to meet the Holder of Self-Control when your endurance and sanity had not repeatedly been pushed to their limits, you cannot possibly have strengthened your resolve enough to accomplish this feat.

 

In any city, in any country, head to the nearest public gathering that you can find. Ask around for "The Holder of Self-Control". Most of those present will now know what you are talking about, but one person will suddenly drop his grin or frown and immediately put on a stoic expression. There will always be one, no matter what the occasion. Once this person is found, strip yourself completely bare and drop whatever you are holding. Keep your hands open and at your sides so that every square inch of skin is exposed. As soon as you are done, the person will lead you through the crowd. People within the crowd will inevitably stare, pass snide remarks, and chastise you, but pay them absolutely no mind. Remain completely stoic and always look straight ahead at the person leading you.

By no more than an hour of walking, you will no longer be walking through the same crowd you started in; the change will be subtle and extremely gradual, but you will eventually realize that you are being led through a crowd of demons. They will taunt you, mock you, laugh at your nudity. Some may even reach out to touch you, but pay them no mind still. As long as you keep walking, they cannot harm you. I urge to you again, remain completely stoic and always look straight ahead at the person leading you. Any embarrassment, anger, or other emotion you feel during this trip will be intensified to such a point that you are completely and permanently paralyzed by this emotion. Perhaps you will be okay if this happens while you are with the humans; at the most, you may be committed to a local mental institution. However, you do not want to be completely paralyzed around demons. Your leader will eventually reach a wall and pass through it, but you will be unable to do so. Stand perfectly still and wait patiently as the demons continue to endlessly harass you. Ignore the demons, ignore your hunger, your thirst, and your tiredness. Stay completely still for days, and a doorway will dissolve into the wall in front of you. Step through the threshold into the room and the wall will close behind you. The walls, floor, and ceiling of this new room should be pure white and all equally illuminated despite the lack of a light source. The room is completely bare except for another nude being in the middle. This creature - human or inhuman - will be the most attractive thing you have ever seen, but you must immediately suppress any form of arousal. The entity will work against you, tempting you first verbally and eventually, in his or her desperation, physically. Do not fall to temptation, do not even begin to consider his or her offers, and even if physically stimulated, do not climax. If you should fail, you will be lost in an eternal state of bliss, forever ignorant of everything else.

If you succeed, however, the tempter or temptress will smile, nod, and tell you that you have passed. In a blink, you will find yourself clothed in a suit or dress made of material finer than you can imagine. You will no longer be weary or hungry, though you have neither eaten nor slept for days. Now and only now may you relax and give into your emotion. A doorway will form in the wall behind you. Thank and bow to the Holder, your tempter or temptress, and walk out the door. It is not known whether or not a sign of gratitude is necessary, but after all that, it would be quite a shame to fail for lack of manners. You will find yourself at the gathering where you had started, and the crowd that once taunted you will roar with applause, even though they do not know why they are clapping.

Your new garments are Object 536 of 2538. With them on, you will never hunger, never grow tired, and never fall to insanity. It's a shame that you only get them now, when your quest is almost complete.

Object 537: The Holder of the Horizon

At any shore, on any landmass, be at the beach at exactly 6:08 PM on any day. If you've done everything right, then you should be alone, and the sky should fade into twilight despite the time of the year or the place on earth you've elected your search.

Once the sun sets, make sure you are walking one direction along the shoreline. If you stop for any reason, something (you will never know what) will leap from the waves and drag you to a cold and lonesome eternity of silent suffocation. The same will happen if you ever look at your feet at any time during the journey. Eventually, if you are patient, an elderly, weather-beaten man with deeply wrinkled skin and sparkling eyes, will appear beside you. Ask the man to point you to the one who calls himself "The Holder of the Horizon". The man will give you an expectant expression, and gesture you in a direction. You must walk in this direction without ever looking at your feet.

In time, you will see a city in the distance. It is guaranteed to be the most terrifying image you will ever see, for the architect of the city is madness itself. If the sun begins to rise, it is advisable to either stop walking or look at your feet, but only because the fate of the thin from the waves is preferable to the one awaiting you. If the sun stays hidden, you must continue to walk in the direction the weather-beaten man has pointed you. If you have not strayed, the city will come no closer and will disappear into the distance once again.

Once the city is well behind you, fatigue will settle in. Your bones will feel like rotting wood and your muscles like breaking chords, but do not give in. Do not stop walking, do not bow your head, no matter how weak your body gets, don't worry; it means you are heading in the right direction.

Finally, once your last drop of strength has left you, the weather-beaten man will catch you in his arms before you fall. You will be too weak to ask him anything with your words, but you must somehow convey the question "Where will They lead Us?" to the weather-beaten man. If you do not, you will die from your exhaustion. If he has understood, he will lie you upon the floor and answer your question in a brief, concise manner, though he may reveal more to you than you can stand. After this, he will lift you up, and hand you a spyglass.

What you see through the spyglass is Object 537 of 2538. It alone can guide you in the right direction.

Object 538: The Holder of the Journey

The long, lonesome road that you are walking is coming to an end, Seeker. If you have survived this long, and gathered at least 500 Objects, then you must go to where your journey began. You must go to the first place you sought an Object.

The first mental institution or halfway house that you could possibly get yourself to, the first theater, the first maternity ward, the first street where a homeless person in a trance-like state pointed you to a nearby sewer, head there no matter the difficulty. When you step into the area where you first asked to see a Holder, despite the weather conditions or other states of affair, you will notice that everything is exactly as you remember it being. The same person will be there, that you first stated your intention to seek to. They will smile upon seeing you, and, if you spoke to them upon your first meeting, they will open during this visit. "You have returned," they will say. "Is your journey drawing to a close?" If you are not ready to face your destiny, then this is the time to turn back. There will be no penalty, and there will be none of His agents dogging your step. You may simply return when you again judge yourself ready.

When you say yes, for you will eventually say yes, having come this far, they will stand up, and smile at you. "Do tell me of the road you have walked, then." The command will be a simple one, nothing in comparison to the horrors you have faced, and the worse ones that you have committed in the name of the Objects. The true horror is yet to come, though. You will begin to speak, at your own pace, of your journey to this spot. You will realize truths about yourself that even the mind-destroying answers of the Holders have not forced into your mind, but you will not find yourself stopping, and your mind will not fail you in regards to remembering every detail. The tale will be a long one, and when you are finished, you will understand yourself completely. You will understand, better than ever, why you sought, the meaning of the journey, and too many other things to recount. All the same, your mind will eventually turn to the atrocities you have committed in your quest for the Objects. The slaughtered infants, the ruined lives, the broken dreams crated solely by you. Unless you are truly wicked, and perhaps even if you are, it will feel as if there is a hole where your heart should be. "Close your eyes," the man or woman will say.

Obey the last command in your quest for the Objects.

You will find yourself standing, naked as the day you were born, on top of something pulsating. If you look down, you will realize that you are standing on a corpse. The corpse of the first person that died as part of your quest to seek the Objects, as a matter of fact. Darkness will surround you, but you must walk forward. You will not slip or falter, and you will walk with confidence. As you step off of the first corpse, another will appear under your feet. Then another, and another. You will walk on a path of corpses belonging to the lives you have destroyed in your quest. The road will curve up, slightly, and growls will be heard around you. These are the creatures beyond counting that have threatened you in your quest for the Objects. They will roar, and bark, and snap at you, but they can do you no harm unless you stop. You have gathered all Objects save one, and they have all failed to stop you. They are powerless, and even the ones with forms said to be so hideous that they would drive you made are plainly visible for you to look upon. You will come upon a mountain of corpses, and you must climb. It will be a long, hard climb, but you can do this. You must do this. You have come too far to fail now.

Upon reaching the summit, you will know that your journey is ending soon. Around you will be all the tangible Objects you have collected, neatly placed in a circle in front of a door. Pick them up and go inside.

Two things lie beyond that door, Seeker: Object 538 of 2538, and your destiny.