Object 352: The Holder of the Challenge

Before you even think to attempt this, be sure to have at least four Objects that are used for combat. Good examples would be the crystal spear from the Holder of Strength and the breastplate from the Holder of Cowardice, but leave them at your house or wherever you keep the Objects you have gotten.

 

In any city, in any country, go to any sports stadium you can get yourself to, be it football, baseball, or even a cybergames stadium it wouldn't matter. When you reach the front desk, buy a ticket for an upcoming game and tell the ticket clerk that you want to rise to the challenge. If done with sincerity and determination, the clerk should print a bloodstained ticket, hand it to you, and whisper something about Caesar. If the clerk fails to do any of these, go home, call your loved ones and tell them anything you want, for you have attempted something you're deemed unworthy of and the Holder of the Challenge never forgives insolence. There will be a date printed on the ticket. It will be random but will always be in the future, never in the past. I suggest you do a tremendous amount of physical training and condition yourself mentally before the printed date.

On the day printed, hail a taxi from your home. Be sure to bring the little black ball from the Holder of the Loop, and tell the driver to drive to the unending horizon. Sit back and relax, for this will be your last chance to do so. As you drive through the city, you will notice everything go backward in time, even your taxi. Once you know, you are riding a chariot. Steel yourself, for if you fall, even the Language has no words to describe your fate. Your ride will eventually come to a halt in front of a half Colosseum. Be alert, for the driver will punch you. If you are quick enough to notice, meet his balled fist with yours and you are sure to get a grin from him. Dodge or get hit by his fist, and you are sure to be knocked out only to wake to a fate even the gods would fear. After your "driver" grins at you, you may now walk to the Colosseum unharmed.

When you enter the Colosseum, you'd think that the outside appearance of being half was just an illusion, but on close inspection, you'd notice that the other "half" is only a reflection from a huge mirror. Approach the mirror and put your palm against the palm of your reflection. Now verbalize your intention to be tested. It doesn't matter what you say or how you say it as long as your intention is clear. If you do not have any true intent of the challenge inside you, you'd see the mirror swallow your palm, slowly drawing you in for years, decades, centuries to pass and the thought of their impending fate claims insolent Seekers long before the mirror does. If you are successful, however, the mirror should crack from your palm and the crack will extend to the whole length of it. It will then shatter to pieces and you would see the other half of the Colosseum and your rival, the person whose abilities match yours or is the nearest to yours (If you are too superior or inferior to anyone you know, you would see yourself instead) and touching your palm with his/hers. A booming voice inside your head will now explain to you the secrets of the Objects you have earned in your travels and will explain to you that you will have to demonstrate to the Holder of the Challenge your worth.

You now need to visualize the four combat Objects you left behind and they will materialize in the air in front of you (note that visualizing the delete key will delete your own soul as it will make things too easy and the Holder never wants things easy; also, visualizing any other item that is not an Object you have earned will ensure that the tale of your fate beyond will be best left untold). The Objects you visualized will now go to each of your hands, both yours and your rival's. By now both of you will have been filled with bloodlust and attack each other for an indefinite amount of time until one of you falls. You WILL feel fatigue, hunger, thirst, and all other normal urges your body has had but inexplicably you will always find yourself at full strength without having to relieve these urges.

Your battle will rage on for centuries to come, never being able to end it as you are both equally matched. If you ever find any of your Objects shattered to pieces by your opponent's or vice-versa, throw that little black ball into the pieces of that Object and it will repair itself, though a more accurate term is that it would recreate itself and you'd find that little black ball back in your pocket. After what would seem like an eon of battle, the Holder will order you to stop your battle. If, at any time sooner than this, you find yourself killing your opponent or vice-versa, curse the god who created you, for your fate is that of a Seeker without Objects to be sought, an empty life until eternity, doomed for neither failure nor success but the void in between. Once the Holder commands you to stop, immediately drop your weapon and kneel like a knight would kneel to his liege. It would now be wise to brace your mind for all that fatigue. Those urges you ignored will hit you, now driving you into that thin line between sanity and insanity.

If you have kept your mind through all of these, listen to the Holder as he tells you tales of epic heroes and their journeys. Some you may recognize and some you will have not known of until now. Be wary if the Holder ever stops. You would need to ask him, "What do They aim for?" He will tell you Their tale, Their reasons, Their motives. Listen to this but pray that you do not comprehend it, for you will surely go mad. After Their tale, the Holder would call you by your full name. Lift your head but do not move away from your kneeling position. You would now see the Holder. Bask in his glorious yet threatening aura, for you have surely earned it. The Holder will string a bronze necklace with a platinum heart that resonates with your heartbeat around you. It will wrap you in a true sense of satisfaction and you will righteously feel that it belongs to you, but its beatings will stop for a moment and surely you will faint at the feeling that your own heart will stop beating. The next time you wake up, you will be in front of your house with a taxi in front of you on the exact date you left. Promptly and politely apologize to the taxi driver and tell him you feel tired because, frankly, you really are. Go back into your house and rest well knowing that your necklace will never stop beating until the moment your own heart stops.

This necklace is Object 352 of 2538. You have beaten a challenge, will you now seek more?

Object 353: The Holder of Vibrance

In any city, in any country, go to the nearest art gallery museum. Enter the building casually, and take time to admire the architecture and interior design of the room. As you study the room's details, approach the main desk. Casually ask the receptionist to speak with "The Holder of Vibrance" out of the corner of your mouth. At no point should you make eye contact; continue surveying the building. The receptionist will respond with "Beautiful, isn't it?" and lead you down a previously unnoticed corridor. Follow them, remembering to avoid eye contact. Eventually, you will come to a pair of large, wooden doors with cast iron fittings, seemingly from a Gothic-style cathedral. They will slowly pull one open and turn to face you, saying, "Enjoy your visit." Avert your gaze; continue looking around the corridor while casually strolling through the door. It wouldn't hurt to say "Thank you."

Once the door has closed behind you with a dull thud, you may stop worrying about avoiding eye contact and truly take in your surroundings. A long, marble promenade with Gothic-style stonework will stretch out before you. On the ceiling is a vast, intricate fresco, better than even the most famous works of Michelangelo or da Vinci. On the floor, an exquisite tapestry, better than the finest Persian rugs, stretches out before you. The large, high windows on each side alternate between exquisite stained-glass scenes and plain windows, through which you will see lush, summary fields of flowers and large, mysterious forests. Do not stare at any one area for too long, or the overpowering intensity flooding your senses may stifle your own life. The colors assaulting your eyes from all directions will make you want to tear them from their sockets. The corridor will seem to stretch on forever. Nevertheless, you must keep walking at a relaxed pace, taking in the nearly overwhelming beauty of your surroundings.

As you walk, however, you will notice the stained-glass becoming sloppier, the forests and fields less lush, the fresco on the ceiling plainer, the runner on the floor more worn and sun-bleached. You will also eventually notice that the intensity of the colors is fading, and with it, your own vigor. Soon, everything will fade to a dull, muddy brown, and then to a simple grayscale. The windows will turn to cracked and bubbled glass, hastily and poorly made in a makeshift furnace. The fields outside will be reduced to parched desert. The mural will devolve into incoherent scribbling looking vaguely like demonic runes, with the paint flaking off and snowing gently down to the ground. The rug on the floor will become threadbare and rotten, with strange insects crawling between the fibers. Each step will consume more of your stamina, to the point of utter exhaustion, yet you must press on. Should you stop at any point, you will become as withered and pale as the barrenness around you.

Should you endure long enough, you will reach another small, wooden door with cast iron fittings, of the same style as the set at the hallway's entrance. Looking closer, you will see termites boring through the wood, and rust encrusting the handle. It will seem impossible that the door can still support its own weight, much less the forces of being used. Regardless, you should knock on it firmly and confidently, with three sharp raps.

Should a deep, man's voice answer in bellowing tones, you have failed the trial. You would do best to throw yourself out one of the windows, as wasting away in the desolate plains would be preferable to the horrid dismemberment - which would, on the other hand, allow you to see a color one last time before you die; the rich red of your own blood.

Should a woman's voice answer softly, you may proceed. Open and close the door behind you as though it were whole, for if you hesitate and treat it gently, it will crumble to dust, and those termites won't be very happy about losing their eternal meal. You will be in a plain stone room, the color still absent from your vision. The Holder sits on a plain metal chair with Her back toward you, painting and humming a vague tune, occasionally looking out the window in front of Her for reference. Do not attempt to look out the window or at Her canvas to see what She's painting. It is doubtful the human mind could comprehend it.

She will respond to only one question: "What color are they?" If you ask correctly, She will say nothing, but push a glasses case off of Her desk, which will land at your feet. Quickly pick it up, open it, and don the spectacles within. If you already wear prescription eyeglasses or contacts, remove them beforehand. These glasses' lenses are made of a finely cut crystal whose mineralogy has never been accurately deemed. Gaze through them intensely; the lenses will begin to glow. Within their delicate crystal facets, all the colors of the cosmos shine brilliantly, most unnamed by humans. When the light snow subsides, you will find yourself standing in the middle of the road outside of the building, the color having returned to the world. If you previously wore corrective lenses, or had undiagnosed vision problems, you will find that the crystal spectacles have granted you flawless vision. A large truck will be approaching - it would be wise to jump quickly onto the sidewalk.

With these spectacles in your possession, you can see the entire electromagnetic spectrum, even beyond the gamma-ray and radio ends, into frequencies undetectable by any modern technology. These frequencies may reveal things you wish you hadn't seen. Through a still-unknown process, the lenses will have integrated themselves into your brain's visual cortex; suffice it to say that it would be unwise to remove them. You will be able to identify any person by their infrared emission pattern, and track most Objects by their unique radiation signature. But beware - should you lose the glasses' interest, blindness will be the best of its inflictions upon you.

Those spectacles are Object 353 of 2538. Keep traveling; never linger in one city or locale too long. They wish to gaze upon the world.

Object 354: The Holder of Relinquishment

In any city, in any country, go to any hospital you can get yourself to. Take with you the keys to your house and a bottle of water that you must bless. When you arrive, go to the front desk and ask to see "The Holder of Relinquishment". The worker will instruct you to wait a while. Take the seat nearest the entrance. Eventually, a new patient will be rushed in. As he passes, give him the bottle of water. Make sure it is firmly in his grasp. That man has been cursed for committing horrifically evil deeds and with that water may purify his soul and escape hell. Once you have done this, fall to your knees and beg for forgiveness and an end to your quest. A nurse shall take you through the hospital, into the intensive care ward where you shall be led to your own room. Open the door and step inside.

I shall be there to greet you; you will not be in a hospital ward but my own home. I will offer you a place to stay the night as well as food and drink. Accept my offers and answer all I ask you truthfully. I will ask details of your quest so far, the sins you have committed throughout your life, and the horrors you have faced. If you try to hide any of what you have done from me, the food you are eating will turn to acid within you and tear through your body. I will then explain the consequences of your actions to you, including the people you have hurt, the lives you have ruined on this quest, and the actions of the man to who you gave the water. The stories behind the acts he committed may drive you insane, but if that is so I shall send you back to the hospital, where you shall spend the rest of your days being treated beside him. If you are still sound of mind afterward, I shall offer you the Object. At this point, if you wish to live you must refuse and reply, "I thank you for your hospitality, but I cannot take this without a fair trade." Next, I shall offer you a spare bed and a place to spend the night; I strongly advise that you accept it.

When you fall asleep, you shall dream. Within the dream, you will be back home, not necessarily where you live now but the place of your childhood or the place you were happiest. You will not be alone in this dream, someone close to you shall be there with you. This shall be the person who has made you the happiest you have ever been throughout your life. This is your chance out, your chance to abandon this foolish quest. For you shall be in control of your actions within dream, and should you but apologize to them, and repent the sins that you spoke to me, and ask for forgiveness, you shall awaken in your bed alone, with an empty water bottle beside you. However, the room in the hospital shall be gone as will any hope of continuing your quest again. Should your desire for my Object be great enough, you must destroy your bond with the person with you, although you may not physically harm them. Insult them, ridicule them, enrage them. You must keep doing so until they attack you. It will hurt like nothing you have ever felt before; they will tear you open and take out your heart. You must laugh at them while they do this, and continue to mock them.

If you do this, I shall pity you and pray for your soul. I offered you a chance of redemption, to confess your sins and escape this path to hell you are on. But you have chosen otherwise. When you wake, those you hold closest to you in your heart will have forsaken you. You shall be in a hospital bed, but not your own. You shall awaken in the body of the patient whose hand you thrust the bottle into. However, the bottle will be cracked and empty. At the foot of your bed is a soaked teddy bear.

This stuffed bear is Object 354 of 2538. It was purified of both of your sins, but you shall bear responsibility for his as well as yours.

Object 355: The Holder of Realization

Only after delving through the madness of your own self, will you be ready to find this Object. This Object has driven all, man, woman, and other beings, to their own doom. It was fate, for this Holder has decided the way you live your pathetic life ever since the day you were born.

If the Sunday sun caresses your cheek with a ray of absolution, be prepared. No, you cannot find this Object on purpose, there is no way you may start this challenge by your pitiful self. A being at your level simply does not have the right to be that powerful. Only after reading this tale, will you ever be accepted. Whether He lets you, is up to Him.

Once the sun kisses your skin, you must lift your head to the heavens. Only if you truly understand yourself, if you truly realize your significance, will you ever be dragged down into the earth below you. If you failed to meet this simple requirement, you will be lifted farther and farther to the heavens, and soon, you will roast in the heat of the sun, without a puff of air to breathe, for all eternity.

By your ankles, you will be pulled, ferocious beasts waiting to consume you if you ever open your eyes. These beasts are, in fact, the very guardians of the Holder of the Note, but, there is a reason you will never see them again if you want through the challenge. If you open your eyes, a horrible death will await, starting with the removal of your own eyes. They will still see, but you will only see the horror of your own reality, whilst your body is left to rot.

Soon, you will slow your descent, as you are slipping through a substance unknown to man. This substance you cannot feel, as it is not physical, but rather, it is the embodiment of our own lust for perfection. And it is thick. If mankind has failed to revert to the golden times by the year of the Gathering, then, this substance will be completely solid, and you will be stuck inside the evil of humans until They have all been gathered.

If you make it through, after what may have been years of your time, you will land softly, in a broken-down arena. Facing you, with an expression of evil plastered onto its face, is none other than your soul. A dagger of pure ivory will be in its hand. Pick up the dagger next to you, made exactly the same, but with ebony, and prepare. These blades will never break, and they shall never dull. If your fight happens to last an eternity, there will be no need for maintenance.

This part of your being will be exactly as skilled as you are. It shares the same history, tactics, strength, and thoughts as you. This is because, simply, it is you. It will not copy your moves, but it will react to you as you would to any other attacker. They will employ the same fighting style as you, the same wit, flaws, strategies. Should you drop the knife, pray that you are a just person. If so, your clone will drop its weapon, and you will both fight hand to hand.

The only way you will win, is if you truly realize that you are the real one, and it is the copy. This, as innocent as it seems, will be impossible for the normal mortal, as this clone will act exactly as you do, speak of the same things you do, it is an exact copy. If there is a pause in the fighting, it will spark up conversations about its past, which is yours. You will question reality, but know that it is yours. Realize this, and you will win. There is no other outcome to this fight.

If, however, it happens to realize this before you, then it is you who is the clone, and your fate has been sealed. You will die, and suffer in the realm of illusion. This cannot be described by words, or feelings, as it is the very definition of nothing.

If your clone realizes it is truly false, it will fall limp, writhing in the fact that it is truly nothing. This is a pain, that if you do not act soon, will be passed onto you. No matter what any Holder can throw at you, no matter any failure in any task they give to you, this pain is the worst. No other will ever match it. Even He fears this pain, as it is great enough to consume him, as well.

You will cry for your soul, as it cries for you. It will speak its final words, which will bury themselves deep into your heart. Pick up its dagger, and kiss your soul. Drive the dagger, up to the guard, into its heart. The pain will be yours, as you are destroying your own soul. If you should hesitate at this pain, you will die. There is no other choice. If you should kill your own soul, you will be lifted toward the heavens.

Once you land, kneel, and bow your head. You cannot look directly at the being in front of you, as he is god. You can ask him one question, and one only. Ask of him, "When will we realize it was us?" He will sigh, and tell you the true meaning of the Objects, and he will tell you who He is. If you are not the Chosen Seeker, you will die.

After this tale, you will feel the grace of his touch, and from your shoulder, a single wing will grow, its beauty rivaling that of the archangels. You will awake, standing where you once were, the ebony dagger in its sheath, the wing cooling in the breeze.

The wing, and the dagger, are the final steps to gain Object 355, True Realization. If you wish to keep this godly gift, you will be cherished for ages and will live until the Gathering, where you will truly suffer. But, you are the Chosen Seeker, after all. Cut off the wing with the dagger, and you will realize who He really is.

Your fall from grace will be your rise to insanity.

Object 356: The Holder of Edges

In any city, in any country, go to any museum. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself "The Holder of Edges". The person will not acknowledge your presence but will return to their normal tasks. Observe carefully the person's eyes: if they have turned red, ask to see the Holder once again. If not, leave immediately without question and seek the Holder of Edges after much self-reflection, for you have been deemed unworthy to receive an audience to the Holder. After you have succeeded in obtaining an audience with the Holder, you will be led into the recesses of the museum, an abandoned wing, the favored residence of many horrors you are about to encounter.

Alone, you will be presented with a straight long corridor to walk through. A silvery straight line runs the length of the corridor, an unearthly opal glow emanating from its skeletal girth. Remove your shoes and socks, clear your mind of any negative thoughts, and step upon the silver line. While balance is not an issue, it will feel as if a blade's edge is being passed through the sole of your foot through your body, halving your organs, bisecting your gut, allowing intestines and so much more to spill out of you. Steel your will and walk along the line. While each step renews your body to fires and agony never suffered before, to step off results in eternal physical torture and pain as yet unknown to mortals. Keep your head straight and look not to the corridor walls where grisly murals of wars and battles past mock you and attempt to waver your determination and courage. Do not step back or turn around while on the path, the consequences of such cannot be described by mere words.

If you have survived the path, and remain sane enough to complete your task, you will have arrived at a simple wooden door. Knock once and kneel at the door to be allowed in, and pray that the door opens; if not, you will be left to choose a slow death by thirst and hunger or by throwing yourself against the unmarked path behind you. If the door does open, inside you will see a naked figure chained to the wall, horrific scars marring the body, making it of indeterminate age and sex. Surrounding the Holder will be blades and weapons of every type imaginable and even some of design so incomprehensible and sinister that one must be mad to even wield them.

As the door closes behind you, the figure will begin to speak within your mind, revealing every hidden shame and secret, insulting you, lashing out at you. Mere words will cut into your body, rending flesh from bone, but you will not die. Pain and shame a thousand times more devastating than from any physical wound will assault you. The source: the chained figure. The various weapons will draw you toward them, lending themselves to help end your pain, to plunge their wicked points and edges into the damnable figure. Remain steadfast and endure - to attack the Holder only invites it to obliterate your soul, etching your screams and suffering into another scar on its body.

Through everything, you must ask one question before your mind is lost: "How must I tame the blade?"

If you succeed, the room will vanish, and you will find yourself in front of the museum. Upon your chest across your heart will be a scar in the unmistakable shape of a sword's sheath.

The scar is Object 356 of 2538. It signifies the willpower and wisdom needed to wield the other Objects.

Object 357: The Holder of Anguish

Make your way to the nearest death-row prison block you can find. Find the manager of the facility and ask to see a prisoner named "The Holder of Anguish". Should the warden's face show a look of resignation and reply that he was executed that morning, then get yourself out of there as quickly as possible, for the Holder's spirit won't be too happy that you were late for your appointment. If, however, the warden takes a look at his clipboard and nods, then follow him to where they keep the permanently next-in-line.

He will lead you down a long, cell-lined corridor. If you look into the cells that run parallel to the walkway, you will notice that as you approach the room of the person you seek, the prisoners become more deranged, starting with your regular Joe at the mouth of the passage to the large, mutilated bodies of the criminally insane at the end. The prisoners will eye you closely, and if each of them advances to the bars of their cells and beats on them in unison, then beg whatever god you may worship that your death is quick. If, however, they know the goal of your quests, they will sit quietly and nod in recognition as you walk past.

Should you reach the end of the hall unharmed, the warden will turn to you and tell you to be quick about your visit, for the prisoner's scheduled execution is near. Respond only with, "I'll be quick about my business," and the door should open for you. It isn't suggested that you utter any other form of acknowledgment, for there's always an empty cell that needs filling.

If you succeed in gaining entrance to the cell of the Holder, you should find yourself in a blackened room, the only light coming from a lamp hanging in the center. The glow from the dim bulb illuminates the form of a man with a hood over his head, strapped down to a wooden chair with what appears to be a metal dish over his head. Remember that you have a limited time, and quickly ask him this question: "How did they survive it?" The Holder's head will then look toward the wall behind you, where a large switch that you hadn't seen in the darkness will now be visible. Try not to think too much about it, and throw the switch.

A loud screeching noise, much like a train coming to a halt, will fill the room, and your body will be suddenly racked with pain. Unbearable pain. Every muscle in your body will contract and the veins in your neck will stretch to the point of bursting. Your eyes will fog with blood and your lungs will stop functioning. You will receive visions of every painful experience that any organism that has ever lived has undergone. You will feel the compounded pain of past millennia. You will thirst for death.

You will not die, though. Just when you think you can't take anymore, the pain will cease. Take as much time as you require to recuperate, for, as you may have guessed, the Holder is now dead and has patience to spare. Rise from the floor and remove the hood of the Holder if you can stomach the smell of burnt flesh. The face will be scorched, rendering any recognition impossible. The force with which the prisoner tightened his jaw during the execution will have crushed every tooth, save for one. Rip the tooth from the gums of the Holder, and make your way from the cell.

The tooth is Object 357 of 2538. They must never come together.

Object 358: The Holder of Improvement

This Holder can only be found in an asylum of the abandoned and worn-down variety, much like the Holder of Revelry. It does not like to use petty guardians, being the sole guardian of its Object. It is so obsessed with self-improvement that it has gone completely overboard and has checked itself into the asylum despite nobody being there.

Rifle through the files until you see a picture of a hand holding a pair of scissors. This is the Object, but you need to pass the Holder's test first. Quickly look behind you. If there is somebody there, then you need no longer worry, for you will be dead before your eyes begin to catch the image of what it is. If there is nobody, pick up the picture and explore the asylum. Search every room. Do not allow the streaks of blood on the walls to disturb you. As you proceed further in, the blood will become more haphazardly strung about, and you will see a body part or two congealed in the blood. You must not be scared. The Holder is testing your bravery as the first phase.

Eventually, there will be a room with a bloodstained... being, its gender not known for certain. Even its voice will be neutral. Do not focus too long on this, for the longer you look at the Holder, the more the Holder you are becoming. You will realize the blood and body parts strung about on the walls belong to previous Seekers. Show the Holder the picture and ask, "What did they do?"

The Holder will attack you. Fight back; if you need to use a weapon, do not hesitate to bring it out. Do not worry if you deliver a fatal blow; in fact, the more deathly your fight is, the more likely the Holder is to answer. Remember, though, the Holder will fight as hard as you do, so be prepared to improve on your battle tactics on the fly if need be. The fight will last for a long time; this phase tests your endurance.

The Holder will eventually give in and tell you what they did. This is the final test; the test of your spiritual strength. You will go insane if you are not Seeker caliber. You will ask the Holder to kill you, if only to spare you from hearing the rest of the story.

In the off chance you do not, bearing the mettle necessary to remain calm and indifferent throughout the Holder's tale, the Holder will vanish into thin air and you must search the asylum once more for the pair of scissors in the picture. It may or may not be in the room the Holder was in, but it will be there. Check the vault of possessions. Failing that, you're on your own.

The pair of scissors is Object 358 of 2538. It's okay to let go of that which you no longer need.

Object 359: The Holder of Deviance

In any city, in any country, go to any store or shop where children's toys are sold. Enter alone, and without any companions, or else there is no hope for you to ever possess what you seek.

Approach one of the staff members. Make sure you have a cheerful smile on your face and ask to see "The Holder of Deviance". If the staff member smiles back with a toothy grin, all hope is lost. You will be taken in among the other "toys" in his collection, to be played with in unimaginably painful perverse ways for all eternity.

If the staff member closes his eyes and turns so that his back faces you, you are one of the lucky ones. He will beckon for you to follow him. Make sure not to speak or make any eye contact with anybody around you. If you do, there will be no chance left for your survival, because they will know of your quest.

The staff member will lead you to a door with a chain hanging from the doorknob. He will usher you through the door and then close it behind him, leaving you alone inside.

There is no light in the room, and you will hear the soft sound of water dripping. After listening to the steady rhythm of the water for just over a minute, call out into the darkness, "But who is truly wrong?"

The dripping should cease and a single bare lightbulb should light in the center of the room, thus dimly illuminating your surroundings. If no light appears, the darkness will penetrate your soul and you will slowly drown in the steadily dripping water. If the lightbulb does light, the silhouette of a figure can be seen just out of range of the bulb's murky glow. Take two steps toward it then stand still. Do not speak.

The figure will step out into the dim light. It is a creature that is an exact replica of yourself, completely naked except for a black collar and leash around its neck. Do not be unnerved by the sight of yourself portrayed like this, for that will only lead to your demise. Keep a steady head and ask the creature, "What if I am right?" Make sure that you look into its face as you speak. The creature will seat itself in the center of the room, its legs spread and its genitals swollen with unexplained arousal.

You will hear distant footsteps coming over closer as another figure approaches from the shadows. The features of this figure are never shown, it will always remain as a silhouette, no matter what light is cast upon it. The figure will take your reflection's leash and force it up onto its knees, then proceed to touch its body.

You must stand there and watch as your reflection is pleasured by unseen hands. Do not look directly at the dark figure or it will turn on you instead, but there will be no pleasure in store if it does. Your eyes must follow the dark hands and the expressions of ecstasy and shame on your reflection's face.

After the silhouette is finished with its business, it will cast the doppelganger aside, turn toward you, and say in a soft voice without gender, "Nobody can be right. All is wrong. All is immoral." The figure will retreat back into the darkness.

Once you are sure that the figure is gone, walk over to the slumped creature and touch its forehead. It will look up at you with a sorrowful gaze and tears running silently down its cheeks. Make sure to look directly into its eyes. You will see the immoralities and perversions of the world, and all that has been corrupted yet once held sacred.

The creature will kiss your hand then stand up. Do not fear the creature for you know what is to come. The creature will then begin to pleasure you in more unearthly ways than ever thought possible. During this orgasmic bliss, your vision will fade to black and you will lose all consciousness.

When you wake, you will be sprawled, naked in the restroom of your dwelling. Where your doppelganger kissed your hand, there will be a faint bruise. This bruise will never fade and will always remind you of the shame you experienced in that dark room.

The kiss is Object 359 of 2538. It will protect you from emotion when it is called upon, but you will never feel another kiss like it, and never feel any shame like that which has been brought with it.

Object 360: The Holder of Fury

In any city, in any country, go to the ruins of a building that has just burnt down. The embers should still be smoldering or smoking, and it must be at night. The best time for this would be under a full moon. You must take yourself to the highest point of the ruin and present one of the Objects. If you do, you should see a light, flickering as a flame would in the distance. Follow this flame quickly. You have precious few moments before it changes direction. If you are too slow, you will follow this flame for eternity, overwhelmed with anger at the small, fleeting light. If you can catch up to the light, however, it will reveal itself as a heavyset man with a lantern and archaic wrist irons. He will look infuriated and will ready himself to attack you. Before he strikes, you must ask a question: "What angers Them?"

If he lands a blow upon you, all is lost. You will be rewarded with a swift and painful death at his hands. However, if you are quick enough, he will calm himself. He will tell you of all the people in history who let anger drive them to tragedy for their own selfish gain. He will then begin singing and cast away his wrist irons as he walks into the distance. Do not follow him.

The wrist irons will grant furious anger to any who wear them, but they are impossible to control. One moment you may be calm, and the next you may be infuriated at an arbitrary target for little or no reason.

The irons are Object 360 of 2538. Do not let your anger consume you.

Object 361: The Holder of Logic

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself "The Holder of Logic". The worker will ask why you wish to see him, and you must respond clearly and truthfully, lest a terrible fate befall you. The worker will ask you to follow her. Take note of how many steps she takes after she asks you to follow; you will need to know soon.

You will walk deep into the institute, down many stairs, and through many hallways. Do not lose count, it is the difference between two eternities. When she stops at a plain metal door, stop counting. If the number is 538, step up to the door and knock seven times. If the number is less than 538, turn around and take that many steps away from the door. The worker will then come back for you and take you safely away from the building, and when you leave you will not remember being there. If the number is greater than 538, then you are already unraveling. He does not see reason to let you continue.

After knocking, the door will open, and the worker will disappear. Inside will be a very well-lit room, painted on each side a different shade of gray. In the center of the room stands a humanoid shape, lacking only in a face, hair, and sex. The shape lacks any distinguishing features, but it is easy to see clearly. Do not look away from the creature, or the room will falter and so will everything sanity blesses you with. The creature will step forward and offer its hand. It will all make sense; he offers another tempting choice. Do not accept this gift, for then an uncanny wisdom will show you the error of your ways and destroy all you are, making you like the Holder. Say very clearly, "I do not wish this power, for it will chain me." The Holder will drop his hand.

It already knows the question, and as his hand drops, you will know the answer. Now, the hardest task; close your eyes and believe that you are standing where you were when you asked the worker to see the Holder. You must know for a fact that it is where you are standing, not in the gray room. If you do not have the willpower, existence will lose all meaning, and the room will be your identity.

Awake from reason, and leave a little smarter than when you came.

The answer is Object 361 of 2538. It is why you are.

Object 362: The Holder of Apathy

In any city, in any country, go to a black walnut tree, alone. Do not go to any other type of tree. Once you arrive, walk up to the tree and place your forehead against the bark, looking only at the roots of the tree as you do so. Put your left hand against the tree and whisper, "I only wish goodwill for the Holder of Apathy."

Count to twenty-three aloud after you address the tree. Do not move a muscle until you have reached that number, lest the bark rip open to reveal gnashing teeth as it devours you. If you are successful, however, the tree you are leaning against will tear open on its own to reveal a winding staircase bathed in darkness. Descend the stairs.

As you are walking down the flights in pitch black, you will be greeted by the most agonizing sounds of torment and pity. No matter what it is, whether a woman is crying for help or your own mother is screaming for you personally, you must NOT call back. If you do, the stairs beneath you will turn slack, and immediately, you will find yourself plummeting to the very depths of Hell.

If your journey is in success, you will find that you have stumbled straight into a grand, old-fashioned theatre. The red curtain will be drawn over the stage, and only one person will be in the entire auditorium. Approach her and sit down in the lavish seat at her side. She should be staring straight ahead at the curtain, but if her gaze falls upon you for even a second as you take your seat, you must cry out, "I have my ticket!" If her gaze doesn't move from you, close your eyes and hope for a swift disemboweling.

If not, take your seat beside her and stare at the stage until the curtain draws and the lights fade out. The play that comes after that is absolutely gut-wrenching. Only the cruelest tales of despair, joy, and betrayal will be acted out onstage by the thespians. Each act will go through every human emotion imaginable; love, fear, happiness, rage, jealousy - every single feeling you have experienced in your lifetime.

After the play is over and all of the actors have taken a bow, the woman will ask you, "How did you fare the play?" Look at her unemotionally, and answer her uncaringly, "I found it in poor taste." Any other answer or opinion will get your eyes torn out shortly thereafter. She will look as though she had just gotten slapped. The next few minutes she will spend trying to reason with you, to get you to admit that the play was fantastic and mind-boggling. No matter what she points out, stick with your original reply and show NO emotions.

Eventually, she will begin to show extreme displeasure with you, scorning and mocking you for your ungratefulness and egotism. Stare straight ahead at the red curtain and don't move your stare for a fraction of a second. Out of the corner of your eye, you will notice that she is changing; her flesh and bones melting and intertwining until there is no longer a woman at your side, but a monster.

As she reaches the climax of her threats and curses, she will begin to attack your loved ones, promising horrific deaths and torment to them if you don't reconsider your opinion. At this point, before it gets any worse, look at her dead in the eye, even though she is now a hideously disfigured creature, and state in complete confidence, "Your opinion is in even poorer taste."

If you failed at showing her your dominance, she'll begin to snicker as she impales you with one of her ribs. If not, she will hang her head in defeat and whimper. Now it is safe to ask your question in any emotion you are feeling.

"What will prompt the Seekers?" She will answer in little more than a whimper in her self-pity. After she has given you her despairing answer, close your eyes and wrap your arms around the hulking bone-creature in an embrace.

When you open your eyes, you will be embracing the walnut tree you had started out with. In your left hand will be a theatre poster.

The poster is Object 362 of 2538. Never see the play it is promoting.

Object 363: The Holder of Tragedy

Turn back now. You don't want to take this test. Let someone else do it. Anyone else but you. If you're that someone else, then this is for you. I wish you the best of luck.

 

Go to any public park with people in it. Get a good look at the park. Soak in all the happiness. Breathe the fresh air. Remember this scene, because it's the last time you will feel joy in your life. Now, close your eyes. Imagine the park as a desolate wasteland, and make sure to pay special attention to the little details. When you feel you are ready, open your eyes.

If you see a tree fall down and hear a crunch, then immediately rush over to the tree. Search for a dead body. If you find one, then consume a drop of the body's blood. I don't care how you do it, just do it before anybody else has a chance. If you begin to vomit violently, then congratulations, you have been accepted into the test. If you don't find a body, you're not the first one to consume the body's blood, or if you don't vomit violently, then you have been rejected. For reasons unknown, the Holder will not murder you or condemn your soul to a fate worse than eternal damnation. Instead, he will let you walk free. You can try this again, but the thought won't even enter your mind.

If you were accepted, then again, congratulations! You will eventually stop vomiting. Once you do, you will notice that neither the tree nor the dead body is there anymore. In fact, nobody is at the park anymore. The second thing you will notice is that your vomit has made a crude hole in the ground. If you wish to turn back, then do so now, because once you go into that hole, you're not going back unless you pass the test. There is no penalty for turning back. In fact, the Holder will reward you for getting accepted in the first place by turning your world into a happy place. You will never witness or hear of another tragedy again. This option is the best, but if you wish to get the Object, then jump in the hole.

The test has begun.

You will find yourself in the ruins of a once-great city. Look around for any skeletons. When you find one, touch it. The organs will start coming back one by one until it looks like a person sleeping. Once this is done, find another skeleton, and touch it. Continue this process until you have restored the last skeleton. When this is done, you will realize that all of the restored skeletons are behind you. Walk through the crowd. They will start screaming and booing you. Some will try to attack you. YOU MUST NOT REACT TO THIS. As you walk further into the crowd, the threats will get nastier and the attacks much harsher. By the end, the people will start doing things that you can get arrested for doing in most countries. Eventually, you will reach the end of the crowd. When you have, turn to face the crowd and whisper, "Is this façade as weak as I had thought?"

If you had reacted in any way to the crowd, then you have failed the test. The crowd will continue to insult and attack you, but you will not feel any pain. You will sit there, forever lost in your dreams. If you managed to persevere, the crowd will suddenly feel guilty for what they had done for you. They will start crying and begging for you to forgive them. However, you must not do this. You must instead kill them in ways that the worst of sociopaths would not even think about. Do not hesitate, and do not feel remorse. Eventually, your muscles will ache, you'll be tired, hungry, and thirsty. Try your best to ignore all of those feelings, because you'll be feeling them for a long time. The crowd will be scared and run away from you, and you'll need to chase each person down for a long time before you finally catch up to them. This process will take years, but you must stop for nothing. Eventually, you will catch someone that looks exactly like you. This is the last person alive, but don't kill him. Look for your reflection in his eyes. Once you see it, he will tell you, "We are not responsible!"

You must tell him, "Who is to blame if not you?" If you hesitated or felt remorse during your killings, the double will disappear and you will remain here for the rest of your life, angry at yourself for your failure. If not, then your double will give you a piece of paper and a pencil. Write on the paper the following words: "Can it be delayed?"

As soon as you finish writing, you will involuntarily close your eyes and fall asleep. When you wake up, you will be back home with your wife and kids. If you don't have any one of those, they will exist and your memory will have changed to include them. Every day you will go to your job (also provided) and come back home to take care of your kids. Live a happy life. Donate to charity, and help random strangers. This sounds easy, but as time goes by, your life will fall apart. You will get fired, your wife will become an alcoholic, your kids will become drug addicts, and life will just seem to hate you. Despite all of this, you must remain positive. Keep reminding yourself that at least you're alive.

After several years, you'll come home one day and find your kids missing. Your wife will tell you how your kids got abducted in between sobs. Listen carefully to your wife. If she mentions a ransom note, then you failed to remain positive throughout your years and will spend the rest of your days homeless and alone. If she doesn't, then tell her, "I could not have traded more."

She will lead you into a trapdoor in the house. Despite living there for years, you will have never noticed it before. Open the trapdoor and go inside. You will notice that you are inside a dark, dusty room. Go over to any corner and assume the fetal position. Wait until a wave of sadness washes over you, and then shout, "Why should we continue?"

The trapdoor will shut. The room will be completely devoid of light. At this point, you will feel sadder than you have ever felt before. You must start thinking about what has happened to you, and what will happen to you. Don't allow anything to enter your thoughts. After years of thinking, the trapdoor will open. Do not react to this. Continue thinking about your life. At a certain point, you will come to a final conclusion. At this point, you may exit the room through the trapdoor. The house will have been transformed into another crumbled building in the desolate wasteland from before. If you care enough to look around, you may realize that the wasteland is actually the ruins of the city you were just in.

Face toward the sun and scream out the conclusion you reached. After that, scream, "And I will heal with time!" Walk toward the sun, and soon you'll start walking on an invisible staircase. Walk with an optimistic grin on your face. If you truly have learned something from your experiences, then after a minute of walking, you'll see a picture strip. Take the picture strip, and examine the five pictures on it. The first picture will be one of you walking through the crowd of people from before. The second picture will be one of you killing one of the people from the crowd. The third picture will be one of you giving money to charity with a melancholy look on your face. The fourth picture will be one of you in the fetal position in the dark room from before. The fifth picture will be one of you walking up the staircase with an optimistic grin on your face.

Turn around and look at the wasteland. Imagine it in your mind, and close your eyes. Pay special attention to the little details. Once you have examined the image in your mind, you will realize that it was the wasteland you pictured in your mind when you first started.

Open your eyes. You'll be back at the park, holding the picture strip in your hand.

This picture strip is Object 363 of 2538. You will never truly find out what it does.

Tragedy takes its toll, but life goes on.

Object 364: The Holder of the Glyph

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to and ask the secretary at the front desk to see "The Holder of the Glyph". She may or may not agree to this - it does not matter. For one reason or another she will excuse herself: maybe to get paperwork for you to fill out, or because she needs a cup of coffee.

As soon as she is out of sight, flee the building immediately. She is the first guardian, and she is the fastest of the seven. Pray that you are out of sight of the windows and that the front door has shut completely by the time she returns. Wait, and do not try to look at the building. For whatever value you place in what is left of your mind, do not attempt to look at the building, or glimpse into the windows, not even from across the street. Should you feel a massive blast of wind rip through you and everything around you, you may reenter the building.

Inside will be a slaughter. Every man, woman, and child will be dead, their eyes having exploded. Blood will splatter the walls, floor, and ceiling, and ooze from their mouths and necks. Now you must move quickly, for their blood hides the next guardian, who is hiding among the corpses. Where the front desk originally was will be a gaping hole in the air. This is a literal rip in the fabric of reality, dark and swirling. You must enter it, and if you are fast enough you might live to leave it.

On the other side of the tear, all will be black and cold. Start walking. Do not stop for any reason. You will walk for hours, or maybe days - time is irrelevant here. Should the third guardian become interested in your path, then eventually, you will see a speck of light out in the darkness. Otherwise, be prepared to wander this nether below the abyss.

The light you are following will illuminate a door, plain and wooden, with a knob in the middle. Be careful now, for the third guardian is watching you closely. Twist the knob twice clockwise and then pull up on the door. If the door catches, or if you hear a low rumble, know this: you have failed, and you will die in the jaws of what is behind the door.

If you have done this correctly, then you will find that the door opens upon a circular room brightly lit with an ambient white light. Along the back wall, you will see four statues carved out of obsidian. Sitting on the floor in the middle of the room will be a small boy, dressed in rags and with a blindfold tied around his head. This is the Holder. Do not speak - to do so would wake the statues, the last four guardians. Instead, silently approach the boy and remove the blindfold. Where his eyes should be will be empty, charred sockets. Now you must remove your eyes and give them to the child. This will be difficult if you have not brought a sharp object, such as a scalpel. It will be agonizing, but do not make a sound - the statues are listening, and hunger for your soul.

If you have done this correctly, then you and the child will appear in the void. Below you, although you have no eyes, you will see the child begin to trace with his finger a pattern. The symbol will be massive and glow in the darkness, and then you will understand. You will see how its path broaches this universe and connects to the others. You will watch its circuit arc in and out of the folds of each reality, see its loops envelop cosmologies yet to be born, and behold as its unending pattern shadows dying worlds and planes of existence. Now that you and the Holder are alone, ask: "When will They come together?" The child will then answer you. He will explain Their beginning, how They were together, and how he has been guarding this last secret, this map at the foundations of existence.

To physically behold this symbol, the glyph, is forbidden for any mortal, and so once again the sight of it will burn away the child's eyes, which, unlike him, are mortal. Do not worry, your vision from the glyph will be more than sufficient compared to your old eyes. It will be burned into the blackness of your mind. With your new method of sight, quickly search through the glyph for your world and enter. Then you will emerge through the rip, back in the bloodfest of the institution. The rip should fold upon itself behind you. The way you see now will easily let you see the guardian hiding in the bodies that you escaped before, and he will know that you have succeeded. Ignore him.

The glyph is Object 364 of 2538. It is many things to the Objects - to you, it is the Map to the End.

Object 365: The Holder of the Year

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask the attendant if you can visit "The Holder of the Year". The attendant will raise an inquiring eyebrow, but will not speak. If the attendant just rolls their eyes and returns to their work, quietly leave the building. The attendant will call security if you pester them, and while you will not be harmed, you will earn an embarrassing reputation as you are forcefully removed.

If the attendant rolls their eyes and stands, mumbling, "How many of these psychos are gonna come here? I mean, it doesn't have to be this place," you have come to the right place. They will lead you through the complex. Don't worry about getting lost, and you can take as much time as you want. Feel free to look around. This place is safe enough, and there are no unspeakable monsters waiting behind any of the doors you pass.

The attendant will show you to a door that defies all earthly descriptions. They will simply watch you, waiting for you to open the door. Open this door; you will feel it probing your mind, searching your every thought for that which it seeks. It will swing open gently, and you must step forward in the blinding light. You will pass quickly through this barrier, and into a small, quaint little town. For every step you take, a month will pass in the town. Make your way to the only building with a blue door. As you walk, take note as the children grow up. They will not notice you, but should one of them begin to strike down the other children, run. Take no heed of how many steps you take, but it is essential you reach the building with a blue door before all the residents of the town are killed.

Inside of the building, there will be all of those who died before you made it inside. They will turn to you, each of them bearing a different item. If any of them bear a large calendar, know that your quest was destined to fail. You will be unable to move as the one carrying the calendar opens the item and strings of text fly from the pages and shred you like a rusty cheese grater. But if none of them bear a calendar, ignore them. The Holder is none of these people; he will be watching your actions. Walk past these people, they will not act as you pass. This building is the town hall, and in the back is a bulletin board. Next to this board will be an oversized calendar that is covered in the writing of numerous events that are to take place in this town. The calendar will state that it is the day you were born, and written on this day will be the words "Infant Sacrifice". At the moment you finish reading these words, tear the calendar from the wall and reveal the portal behind it. Throw yourself into this portal IMMEDIATELY, for the Holder has seen your action and is hastily closing this escape route. Keep a tight hold on the calendar as you fall. It may seem like a minute, it may seem like a millennia, but keep your hands on the calendar. It is the only thing guiding your freefall through oblivion.

If you moved fast enough, you will find yourself on the floor underneath the desk of the attendant at the mental institution or halfway house. They will glare down at you and say, "Took you long enough." Quickly get out from under the desk and hope no one sees you as you leave. Gossip spreads fast, you know. Head to any place you can call home, and laying on the kitchen counter next to the coffee maker will be a small black planner filled with words written in an unknown language.

This planner is Object 365 of 2538. The last day in this planner is your birthday, and it has yet to have "plans" written in.

Object 366: The Holder of Sadism

In any city, in any country, go into any mental institution or halfway house you can get to. As you enter, make sure you stride over to the clerk without any hesitance or fear in yourself and demand to see the one who calls herself "The Holder of Sadism". If the clerk laughs, then running will not save you from the gruesome fate that now awaits you. If, however, the clerk raises an eyebrow at you and tells you that they have never even heard of this being, then grab them around the neck and hoist them from their chair. Demand again to see the Holder of Sadism and the person will move their hand to some sort of lever. Do not release them as they pull it, do not release them as the floor vanishes from under you and you fall into it. You will need them to advance.

It will seem as if you are falling for a very long time, but do not release the clerk at any moment during this time. You shall eventually land upon a ground covered in metallic thorns. These will dig into your skin, starting the pain you will experience in this realm. You must not ignore the pain, but let it be known.

The floor of the entire realm is covered in various, and painful, objects. Metallic thorns, burning coals instantly followed by shallow water that seems to be filled with piranhas, followed by an icy area that will no doubt freeze your tortured feet and perhaps give them frostbite if you cannot move through it quickly enough. Not many seem to make it through this before their feet give out, but you must and you must force the clerk to come with you. Take joy in the pain that they take, every agonizing step of the way. You will reach a door that has an electrical charge. Make the clerk open it and continue on to the next painful trial.

This will consist of whatever you fear the most, what would torture you the most to go through, and it is alright to show this fear, this pain; it delights the Holder of Sadism. So, do not deny it or appear to act brave. You have faced many horrors by now that I am sure death is not your greatest fear. If it is, then rejoice; your death will be swift.

If it is not, however, you will have to deal with this torture, with the clerk taking delight in it. If this sadistic being does not enrage you as you suffer, then you will fail. If they do, and if you manage to curse them and yell that you would like to see them confronted with the worst torture imaginable, then your torture will end and theirs shall begin. You must not show even a hint of compassion, do not let your heart be softened by their pleas for mercy. Instead, after a few minutes of this, you must demand that their torment be worse, that this could not possibly be the worst torture possible.

If you are convincing, the Holder of Sadism will walk into the room. Do not be deceived by her appearance, for although it seems mild and weak, her red dress was not always red. She will ask you a simple question: "What would be appropriate?"

If you answer anything besides "Hopelessness," then you will experience what you said for all eternity and become well acquainted with the feeling of hopelessness. This answer will intrigue the Holder of Sadism. She will speak again and ask, "How does one take away hope?"

But you must not answer this, you must tell her in return that if she does not know, she is not worthy of her title as the Holder of Sadism. She will scream in a rage and you will soon know the torture of all the torture devices known and unknown to man. You will be mentally, physically, and emotionally wounded, but now is the time when you cannot flinch. You must not let out a single cry, a single tear must not fall from your eyes. If you can manage to be strong in the face of all the torture she knows, then you will wake up in the place where you were born, clutching a dead dove. This dove is the sign of hope, the caged bird that never seems to die, but as you can clearly see, it has.

The dead dove is Object 366 of 2538. Are you sadistic enough to let the world know hopelessness?

Object 367: The Holder of Continuation

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask with a silent but crucial voice to visit someone who calls himself "The Holder of Continuation". The worker will look at you with cold, cruel eyes. He will not speak, he will simply shiver as if something disgusting has come over him, and lead you behind the desk through a wooden door that you did not notice before.

Before he even opens the door, you can smell the rot of the rust and the mold behind it. For half an hour, he will lead you through a long, spiral corridor, shivering and shaking from a mix of the deep cold, and of his own fear. He will stop in his tracks and look to the floor as if he was waiting for someone, and he will only move if you say, "Step aside if you fear what's ahead."

He will look at you one last time, then stare at the wall, and a door will appear where there was just emptiness of the brick. Walk through the new hallway presented to you, and look at the floor as if you dropped something. Do not show any fear, no matter what noises protrude from the hall. A rattling voice will be heard as though it were right in front of you, and it will speak. "Your task is far from over, what do you wish to do?" Tell him you wish to continue and hold out your hand. Ask "How can they continue?" for if you don't, he will ravage you and torture you until you wish to die in that very chamber.

The voice will tell you about every particle and germ, and every hand that was laid upon the Objects, and how they survived as long as they did. If you did not break into tears or show any form of mental weakness, the Holder will be heard smashing against the walls and screaming in horrible burning pain that can only be caused by hell's fire.

The Holder will appear from the darkness, but do not look up at him. To look up is to show weakness, and the need to give into him. You will feel something smooth, light, and feeling of cold metal fall into your hands. The Holder will fade back into the darkness, now free of his burden.

The brass horn is Object 367 of 2538. No instrument can match the sorrow of its tone.

Object 368: The Holder of Paradise

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls herself "The Holder of Paradise". The man there will become angered by this and demand that you leave. Under no circumstance should you do what he says, for if you do, then all hope will be lost. Instead, continue asking about the Holder of Paradise and, eventually, the man will open a previously unseen trapdoor, revealing a set of stairs.

Once you start your descent, you can never stop. If you do, then your death will not be swift. After what seems like an eternity, you will see a door at the bottom of the stairs.

Through the doorway will be a beautiful land. Do not stare at one spot for long, however, or it will become increasingly ugly until what is seen would drive any man insane. There will be a single pathway leading into a forest. Go down this path and you will eventually reach a clearing.

In the center of this clearing is a beautiful woman. At this moment, you are completely safe. You may even choose to exit by following the path that continues behind the woman. If you do this, then you will never receive the Object.

If you do not choose to leave, then ask this woman one question: "How did they come to be where they are?" The woman will answer with a wonderful and epic story. As she is telling the story, she will slowly transform into a hideous beast. Once it is finished with the story, the monster will beckon for you to continue toward the exit. Run for it as quickly as you can, for the creature will pursue you and if it catches you, then unspeakable things will happen to you.

If you manage to make it through the exit, you will find yourself outside the building. On the ground in front of you will be a beautifully crafted box. Do not open it, for doing so will unleash a great evil unto the world.

The Object inside the box is 368 of 2538. It will surely destroy us all.

Object 369: The Holder of Gluttony

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit something that calls itself "The Holder of Gluttony". If the person's face becomes twisted by a look of utter nausea, you will then be taken to a set of doors labeled "Mess Hall".

If you are foolish enough to pass through these doors, you will find yourself in an old corridor of pitted and broken stone. Tiny beams of light filtering through the many cracks in the mortar will be the only source of illumination available, leaving you nearly blind. The walls will be covered in frescos and paintings, but it is imperative that you not look upon them - for although they are masterfully rendered, they depict acts so depraved that they will almost certainly drive you mad. Continue down the path until you come to another door. Upon the door will be carved a face with a gaping maw.

Peer inside the door's mouth and you shall be assaulted by images of cannibalism and death. If you should view a sense of yourself being consumed, run. Run far away and do not stop until you collapse from exhaustion. If you wake in the morning and cannot hear, then thank the powers above that deafness was your only punishment. If you retain your hearing, then prepare yourself for you will be consumed by a never-ending hunger for all things forbidden, with no way to avoid acting on your desires.

If you see the laughing face of a man long-dead, walk forward and push upon the door with all your might, opening it inward to reveal a small circular room lit by torches spaced evenly along the wall. In the center of the room, there will be an impossibly obese man. His arms and legs will be submerged, invisible through the many layers of fat that hang from his frame and his body will be stained with the remains of his previous repast. From the top of his great stomach to the bottom of his navel is a tremendous gash, held shut by a row of poorly done stitches. He will eye you hungrily for a moment and this will be your only chance to save yourself by asking, "What keeps them inert?" If you do not ask quickly enough, he will devour you and you will spend the rest of eternity lost in agony as you travel through his endless digestive tract. If you are quick enough, he will answer your question with a tale of perversion and evil, and finally a resignation to eternal sleep.

At the end of the story, he will begin to convulse as the stitching on his gut falls apart and his stomach opens up releasing a torrent of gore which will hurl you against the wall, knocking you unconscious. When you awaken, you'll find yourself on the sidewalk outside of the institution you entered, clutching a small vial of thick red liquid.

That vial, and the blood within, are Object 369 of 2538. They must never come together, lest the world fall into slow decay.

Object 370: The Holder of Beauty

In any city, in any country, go to any open field you can. There should only be two people and two animals. Speak to both races that you seek the one known as "The Holder of Beauty". Both races will freeze and stare at you blankly should you be worthy. The world will twist. Pay no heed to this and stare at the sky calmly, lest you be devoured by the void.

Once all is calm yet again, look at the world to find yourself in a meadow. The meadow will be covered in simple petals. Avoid these at all costs! After all, beauty is changed by the mind. Walk toward the forest of trees covered with these petals and pray no winds blow. Should you make it to the edge of the woods, speak unto the trees that you wish to speak to the Holder of Beauty.

As soon as you speak these words, a woman as beautiful as anything you have seen will come toward you. You will notice that She is also covered in wounds and blood. Do not flinch at these. This is considered as an act of rudeness to She who is most beautiful and most deadly. If you are worthy, She will ask you the question, "Which is most beautiful but most deadly?" Answer properly: "Only Death can be Beauty." Upon saying this, a wind will blow and you will be consumed by petals. Look upon the petals with wonder in your eyes. A hard task for most.

When all is quiet once more, ask, "When have they shown?" You will be ignored while the woman plays with the petals. Wait for an absolute minimum of two minutes. Should you speak before then, you will be consumed by the horror that can only be described as beauty. When the time comes, ask again, louder by politely. She will look at you with a grin as terrible as the damned. She will tell you of the past, present, and future bloodshed in a voice filled with joy and wonder. Many Seekers have come this far expecting ease, do not be so foolish. Many minds crushed are now gazing at the sky into nothingness as if it were simply that beautiful inside the beautifully damned forest. If you make it through the horror, you will find a bench that was not there before. On it is a petal.

The petal will cut through those you hate but also on you and the ones most loved by you. This beauty is double-edged.

The petal is Object 370 of 2538. Beauty changes with the mind, is this good or bad?

Object 371: The Holder of Boredom

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. Sit in a chair in front of the front desk, and wait. Be prepared to wait a long time. If necessary, you may eat and drink, but you must not sleep, and you must not move from the chair. Eventually - after some time - a man in a heavy trench coat will occupy the seat just across from yours. He will have a locked briefcase, which he will carefully set beneath his chair - this will be your cue to act. Clear your throat, and he will look up at you.

Take this opportunity to note his hair color - if it is red, apologize and try again another day. If it is black, then may god help you, for you will lose all will to live, and suffer an excruciating death from the sudden lack of motivation to breathe. If his hair is blond, you will lose all willingness to collect the Objects; he will then somberly request them, and you, being of no mind to argue, will numbly comply. If his hair is gray, however, and stiffened with age, you must meet his eyes, and ask to meet "The Holder of Boredom". The man's face will not change, and he will gaze at you for a brief time. Then, with a bemused look, he will stand up, and open his trench coat - revealing that he lacks any form, with a thick gray miasma wholly taking the place of his body. You will find yourself inexorably drawn into the miasma; close your eyes as you are enveloped by it or you spend an eternity floating in the gray haze, alone and unable to move.

Open your eyes once you realize that the sounds of winds, distant laughter, and rushing water have died away. You will find yourself in a blank, white void. All around you, you will see nothing, and you find yourself completely weightless. Look around until you see the merest suggestion of an outlined figure in the distance. Begin slowly moving toward this figure. DO NOT, under any circumstances, go toward the figure if you are not sure of its singularity. There is but one correct path, and deviation from it will paralyze you, casting you adrift in this blank, vast sea of emptiness.

Once you are on the path, you must be vigilant. You must continue forward without any change - maintain your speed, your direction, your focus. If you are to look away, or your path to drift, the figure will disappear and you will be forever lost. The figure at first may not appear to move any closer, but maintain your purpose. Continue on.

Finally, the figure will emerge from the void, holding reverentially what appears to be a Rubik's Cube with indistinguishable sides. His black hair will be just visible beneath his cloak. His head will rise at your approach, and his hands tighten upon the cube. You must stop before him, and ask this question: "What drives the Seekers?"

In response, he will turn one side of the cube - slowly, and meaningfully. As it locks into place, you will feel a pool of agony surge through you as your body teeters on the edge between dimensions - you may feel yourself beginning to age, or grow younger, or feel your body compress, or decompress - but above all, hold on to the feeling of just prior to the experience, the feeling of normality. If you do not let go of the previous moment, you should make it through the pain with minimal organ failure or broken bones. He turns the cube's side once more, and you suddenly feel... focused. Sharper. As though there was an imperceptible problem throughout your entire life that has just been corrected. (NOTE: While you are in this state of heightened awareness, use this opportunity to remember the Objects, remember your purpose. This is crucial.)

The man will turn the cube again, and you will feel all willpower sapped from you. You will feel completely apathetic, and will be in danger of giving up your quest - unless you are of a strong mind, and have taken the previous precautions necessary. If you succumb, and give up your quest, you will be robbed of your senses and left adrift in the void, sightless, voiceless, and essentially mindless.

If you retain your purpose, the man will turn the cube's side once more, and the world will return to the one you are used to. Seeing that you have overcome his trial, the man will, smiling, hold out the cube and drop it. Move quickly, or it will fall into the endless void - move downward with all due speed, and catch it.

As soon as you feel its weight in your hand, your fall will slow until your knees, forced up by inertia, move you into a sitting state, at which point the void will fade to the lobby of your original location. The cube will still be in your hands; however, the man will be gone. A custodian will retrieve the man's briefcase from beneath the seat he once occupied. This is the cue for you to exit.

The Rubik's cube is Object 371 of 2538 - a reminder that your pursuit must be relentless and purposeful.

Object 372: The Holder of Adaptation

Only one man has ever come anywhere near this Holder and returned to tell the tale; accounts of his life and times vary, but they all seem to agree that he was nailed to a cross, at least. After that, it's anyone's guess what really happened; over the centuries and through many retellings, there have been details gone messily awry, and so nobody really knows for sure what happened; not even those who have earned positions of power or authority know the whole story. Some say he will return on the universe's fated day; others say he decays in a tomb apart from where he was originally placed. His name and appearance have also gone through several retranslations over time; it's unknown if even the earliest recorded name for this man is the correct one.

This Holder is said to be everywhere; there is nowhere you can be without this Holder. Some say this Holder "is Love"; others say you must "give yourself" to this Holder, and still others say you must "accept" this Holder "into your heart" or some other variation. To this Holder, "all have fallen short" of the Holder's glory, and must be redeemed through repentance, or cast away should they refuse.

It's unknown even if the Holder has an earthly home; it is known to shun all so-named "worldly" things, perceiving them to be subpar to the Holder's greatness. Indeed, the Holder says in many accounts that if you are a friend of the world, then you are an enemy of the Holder. It tolerates no irreverence, calling even the most meager forms of it sin, and names all other gods demons unless they invoke in its name. It may not even know it is a Holder; on the other hand, it may very well know it is one of Them, and is acting accordingly.

This Holder's quest requires physical death of the body, so unless you are prepared to die, you may want to wait to seek this Object, if you intend to at all.

Prior to the moment of your death, you will see in front of you a blinding, dazzling light that comes to reclaim you for its own. The ideal exit is to merge with this light, but if you seek this Object, instead of letting yourself merge, wait for the next, dimmed form of the light to appear, then ask this question: "Why did they have to adapt?"

Usually, when they die and miss the first two light forms, a person enters a three-day phase where they relive significant moments in their life, but if you ask this question, the three-day phase becomes five days, in which you must experience being each of the 2538 Objects for a short while. The understanding causes many people to wish they had chosen to become the light instead; it is preferable to the horrors the Objects have both endured and caused.

After you have been the diamond, everything will become red and dark, and you will feel compressed, as if something dense and solid is trying to become you. Do not struggle against this. Do not try to escape it. There will be plenty of time for struggles and escapes later; right now you must endure the end of death and return to life.

After you are reborn, through a series of uncanny synchronicities, you will eventually come across a familiar Object, one that you will have either worn, read about, or been told tales of.

The crown of thorns is Object 372 of 2538. Prepare yourself for what is still to come.

Object 373: The Holder of Blessed

In any city, in any country, go to any church of god you can get yourself to. Look for the nearest priest or preacher and say, "Damned be all who are not."

If he replies, "Blessed are those who are," then you are doing things right. If he should instead give you a strange look, you have either chosen the wrong church or failed. There's no way of knowing if you've failed, or what can make you invalid to have audience with this Holder. If you've failed, though, perhaps that is for the best. This Holder is more powerful than usual, and isn't to be tampered with.

The priest will lead you to a previously uninteresting door. Beyond that door should lie a hallway much like the rest of the building, but lined from end to end will be ornate crosses. Do not touch any of them, for they hold the gate open.

Through the door at the end of this hall lies a small chamber made entirely of stone, and when you step into it you will feel very far from where you were. The priest will follow you, and point to a baptism pool in the center of the room. Step into the pool, and get ready to hold your breath.

The priest will begin to recite a prayer, and then will put you under. Close your eyes and hold your breath for approximately 15 seconds. Don't move, and DON'T THINK ABOUT ANYTHING. You are entering an eternity, and thinking about your trials will simply place you into them forever.

When you open your eyes, you will be in a vast ocean of clear water. You are the only thing in sight forever, with the water only disturbed by the ripples of your presence. The sky will be mirrored perfectly in the ground. The beauty of its perfectness will awe you, and don't worry; it'll last.

You will have to wait from now until what can only be assumed as midnight. Do as you wish, though I personally suggest that you have a floatation device, because it's a long wait. No harm can come to you while you wait, save muscle cramp or boredom. Perhaps you can test how deep you can swim, but avoid drowning, and if something moves in the corner of your eye, don't try to look at it. The shock and horror may kill you, even if it can't.

When the moon rises to its highest point, look straight at it, and don't blink. Ask it, "Who will be with me when they are all together?"

Expect to be lifted from the water. The sensation will be like that of having the earth itself drop out from under you. Keep your eyes on the moon, or else you will fall back into the water, into the maws of the ancient beast Leviathan. The beast will slowly digest your body, and cage your soul in its stomach until the final coming. This is a fate too many a foolish have suffered. If you had a chance to see it before and survive the pure terror its visage imparts, congratulations; you're one of only 7 in the last million years.

Your ascent should slow as a gleaming object comes into view. At the top of your rise will be a small light, centered in your sight in such a way that, at a distance, it could not be distinguished from lunar glow. It will approach you slowly, and every moment it closes distance with you, your mind will be filled with visions of the moment when all of it will make sense. You will ache for it, reach out for that second of understanding, but all in vain. When the light touches you, you will be hurled back into the water headfirst, so deep that the pressure might crush your body, were it real. Water will seep into your lungs, and you will drown.

When you are done dying, you will wake up on the grave of an unnamed person. In that tomb, you will find a corpse robed in white. These robes will attract the attention of all cursed men, and they will seek your guidance in curing their illnesses when it is worn. If you choose not to wear these robes, however, they will leave you for a more worthy Seeker.

The robes are Object 373 of 2538. They must be your final dressings.

Object 374: The Holder of Nod

Visit any mental hospital or halfway house in any city, in any country, but do not enter the building. Instead, find yourself an open plot of grass and soil, sit and watch the sunset. Once the sun meets the horizon and sky alights in a crimson luminescence like a sea of blood, close your eyes tightly and voice these words: "Why art thou worthy?"

Once these words pass your lips you will feel the wind pick up around you. Thunder will rumble, lightning will crack, and the earth will shudder. You must not, at any point during this tumult, open your eyes; human eyes were not meant to bear witness to the creation of the universe. Once the wind dies down and the cacophony subsides, you will begin to see things, even through closed eyes. You will soon find yourself sitting in front of a large, ivory gate; the entrance to a vast and beauteous garden. There will be a man wielding a flaming sword standing guard in front of the gate. No matter how strongly the garden calls to you, no matter how tempted you are to approach the gate, you must not. The garden is not your destination.

You must, instead, steel yourself with resolve and head unfalteringly left of the gate. You need not walk far, only a short distance will suffice. Simply walk until you can no longer hear the song of the birds within the garden nor smell the scent of the flowers, at that point you may stop walking.

Now you may open your eyes.

Against all reason, your vision will be engulfed in darkness complete. In this darkness, you will hear a man's voice. He will be speaking of gifts and worthiness, honor and transgression. He will be speaking of despair and desolation. Listen to him for a while. Once you think you have heard enough, interrupt him with the question: "Are you your brother's keeper?"

At this, his voice will abruptly cease. Footsteps will be heard approaching you, echoing as if upon hardwood floors. A figure will come into view; seeming to materialize out of the nothingness surrounding you. A man standing alone in a sea of absolute darkness. The man will look ordinary; not hideous, not monstrous. Middle-aged, tired; but normal. The only thing truly unsettling about him will be his eyes. In his eyes, you will see agony and loneliness immeasurable. You will see it and you will be forced to feel just a portion of it in your own heart. In a whisper, he will relate to you a tale of love, jealousy, betrayal, and punishment. He will relate to you his tale and he will explain exactly where it is that you are. Listen carefully.

You are standing in the land of Nod; east of Eden. You are standing in the absence of god speaking with the only person gone unloved. But a person can only survive in such torment for so long, and this man's time draws nigh. If she should die before the Objects are brought together... the absence of god shall encompass all, and all shall be lost to oblivion.

The land of Nod is Object 374 of 2538, and its Holder begs you to accept it from him.

Object 375: The Holder of the Gods

In any city, in any country (we recommend Italy or any other country that had a history of believing in more than one god), go to any mental institution or asylum you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask the attendant if you can see "The Holder of the Gods". The receptionist should look at you with amazement and wonder in her eyes. If she looks down at you and sneers, then at least your death will be one no one but you will see.

She will give you a large key, and point you in the direction of the Holder: a nearby window. Thank her, and head toward the window. Climb out. You should have entered onto a well-watered, lush lawn, filled with flowers no other mortal man has ever seen. Don't pay any mind to these details, but instead look up to the clouds passing high up in the sky. There should be a long rope hanging down from the cloud. Without hesitation, grab the rope and begin to climb up. If you do not reach the rope in time, then you shall go with the ground into the dark pits of Hell.

Begin to climb up the rope. You should never run out of energy while climbing, and the only sound you hear should be birds chirping. If at all the sound stops, rather abruptly, IMMEDIATELY stop climbing and shout out, "My job is done, but my path goes on! This is the way, and I shall not stop for the likes of you!" Should the noise continue on, then continue your climb. If not, then release your grip, for an infinite fall to your death is one much more suitable than the one that there would be with the beast.

Once you finish your hazardous climb up, you should see an immense throne, in which sits a wizened old man, very muscular for his age, and standing at least three stories tall. Surrounding his throne are thousands of small children, each wearing a toga or pure white, similar to the one the old man wears. You must ignore the man, and instead, look for the one child wearing a purple toga. Once you find her (at least, it should be a her), begin to make light conversation with her. Her appearance is of a small child, so treat her as such, playing with her, conversing with her as you would a small child. The old man should be getting more and more angry as the time goes on. At one point he should stand, sending shockwaves over the ground.

He will shout, "How could this one be more important than I?" You must respond, with as much force as you can muster in front of this giant of a man, "And where are your colors?" The man will look at you coldly with this statement, and raise his hands. All will go black, and it is best for you to close your eyes at this point, for he has banished you to the Void, and there are sights nothing should ever see, not even those in the Void themselves. Before something in the Void realizes you are here, should out into the Abyss, "What is it that They kneel to?"

A voice should whisper to your the answer. "The one who seeks." The voice shall continue on, telling you of a story of how They fell, how they kneeled in respect, and how they rebelled, in every single detail, from the grains of sand that moved to the bones that broke.

When the voice stops, wait 10 seconds, then open your eyes. You will be inside the establishment, looking out the window. There should be a purple toga outside, but do not go through the window to retrieve it, for it will only deliver you back into the void, removing your eyelids first, so that there will be nothing stopping you from taking in all that there is to see of your new home.

Exit the building and pick up the toga, which is Object 375 of 2538. The toga gives the power of the gods, but only once. Timing is everything, but remember the gods have a short temper.

Object 376: The Holder of Safety

In the vast, high desert mountains of the southwestern United States is where I, the humble Holder of Safety, reside.

I am not in an asylum, or indeed in any business; the Object I keep must be used either on one's person, or kept in one's personal dwelling.

Indeed, you will be hard-pressed to find me, because you cannot go to any enclosed four walls, ask for the Holder of Safety, and expect there to be an outlandish puzzle leading to some demonic beast-creature. I'm an ordinary human, just like you, who leads an ordinary life.

However, there is a way to approach this Holder, and begin the test. Turn back now if you do not wish to experience a real, live Holder.

As stated before, I live in a medium-sized city in the southwest United States. You may be searching Arizona and New Mexico for the rest of your life, but if your destiny is yours, Seeker, either during your first few tries or long after you have given up hope of finding me, you will see a person wearing headphones, stopped at an intersection, and you ask to speak to the "The Holder of Safety".

My response, if you have found me, will be to raise my eyebrow and say, "You're seriously looking for the Holder of Safety?"

If I lead you to any other place than my personal dwelling, I have deemed you unworthy of the Object that I hold, and you'd better find a way to escape, because you do not want to see the bad side of me that will come out. Let's just leave it at that.

"Spaghetti?"

It is very spicy, because I used all the green chile for the sauce. You would do well to at least have a bite. I may be in the gray area between savage and civilized, but I do have some manners left.

"So, why do you seek the Holder of Safety?"

You must answer truthfully. I will already know your intentions, and if you say anything other than what I already know, I will sense you're lying and deliver the appropriate punishment. Save yourself the trouble.

"You do know that these Objects must never be brought together, right? This is no small matter. They must be kept apart for all time."

If you fail to understand that, then I can only hope that you're used to being beaten down by that which is greater than you. I have many scruples, but they will go out the window if you mean to bring them together, and I will show no mercy.

Finally, you must endure my test. What the test will be is entirely up to me - I am the Holder, after all. It will not be easy, and you will want to give up. I am one of the few Holders - perhaps the only one - who will let you go free if you do not wish to endure the entire test. What happens to you afterward, however, cannot be my responsibility, for obvious reasons. In the near-impossible chance that you do manage to pass my test, I will place my pendant around your neck, give you a large stick with runes carved in it, and let you go free.

The pendant and branch together make up Object 376 of 2538, the Divine Charms of Protection. Even if you don't mean to go after the other Objects, the fact that you now possess these means you will never be safe again without them.

Object 377: The Holder of Twilight

Go to a sit-down restaurant and when someone comes to seat you, say to them, "I wish to see the Holder of Twilight." They will look at you as though you are insane, but seat you anyway. Get something to eat; you'll need your strength.

When finished with your meal, go to the washroom. Between the men's and women's washroom, there is a door for those in wheelchairs. Knock three times and wait for a response. If someone speaks, or knocks back, leave the restaurant and drive far away, but never leave the sight of other people until at least a month has passed. If no response is given, open the door. If it is locked, get a staff member to open the door; either you did it wrong or someone inside needs medical attention, or you did it right and damned them with your greed.

Upon entering the bathroom, go about your business. The Holder of Twilight will not wait any longer than necessary, however, and soon the room will become pitch black. As your eyes adjust, you will find yourself on a thin path. There is only one way you can walk, and upon moving forward the way back will collapse into oblivion, the wall always at your back. Eventually, the path ahead will turn white, but the wall behind you will remain dark as the abyss. When you reach the end, the two giants will collapse and the world will fade to gray. A voice will ask you for your name. Remain silent. It will ask again, this time for your birthday. Do not answer, for if you do, the creature you face shall end your life.

All you can do is ask the disemboweled voice, "Where will They become one?" The voice shall tell you of a place of safety and warmth that will be consumed by innumerable horrors, describing each in turn with a cackle of glee. She speaks of children bleeding from gaping wounds fatal to a grown man, of fetuses torn from desperate women, and of the maddened fathers who kill one another in blind fits of rage. If you keep your composure, the voice will never stop speaking until she has described all there is. If you feel ill, she will stop, and you will be able to see the speaker; a wrinkled crone older than whole civilizations. She will reach out to you and lift you up, then hand you her scissors.

When you take her hand, you will faint. Upon regaining your senses, you will be in the very place she told you about. It is a place of infinite happiness and joy, and only you can imagine the horrors they will endure.

The scissors are Object 377 of 2538. Dull blades made only to end life, the impartial judge sees both sides.

Object 378: The Holder of Thirst

In any city, in any country, go to any blood bank or plasma center you can get yourself to. If you are a regular donor, you won't have to wait as long, but in any case, donate the amount of your body's fluid that the center calls for, and instead of receiving your payment after you are finished, ask to speak to "The Holder of Thirst". The worker will insist on paying you in cash; you must be even more insistent on speaking to the Holder. If you are in the right place, and are appropriately aggressive, the worker will walk to a vending machine and buy you a bottle of water. It will have no label, but do not concern yourself with this.

No matter where you are - even if you are in the rainy Northwest United States, the door the worker takes you to leads to a vast, arid, dry desert, with not even a cactus to mar its immensity. You must cross this desert without drinking from the bottle in your hand. No matter how tempting it may be, leave the lid on the bottle. It is not for you to drink from.

After miles and miles of crossing desert (the speed will help), you will come to a verdant oasis. If you don't lose yourself in the oasis, you will notice a woman sitting on a chair fashioned from the palm trees, surrounded and pampered by other women. Offer her the bottle of water. If she accepts it, you may proceed. If not, well, at least you made it to the oasis. After she finishes drinking it, ask her, "Will their thirst be quenched?"

"Their thirst can never be quenched. Only when they are all brought together will they ever know themselves, because they were never meant to be separated as they are."

A fierce, cold wind will begin to blow. The desert will vanish, and you will be back in the center, holding the empty bottle.

The empty bottle is Object 378 of 2538. It is unknown just what substance truly belongs inside, for it repels all known liquid.

Object 379: The Holder of the Five Phases

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask the person working there if "The Holder of the Five Phases" is present. If he should turn and stare intently at you for several minutes, you know you are in the right place. If not, turn, run, flee as if your life depends upon it, which of course it does. Do not stop, as your torture will be more painful, more horrible, more absolutely terrifying than anything you have ever imagined.

If, however, he does turn and stare at you, look directly into his eyes, which should be shifting colors. In his eyes, you will see endless horrors, your friends being murdered, the people you love being viciously torn apart before your very eyes. Do not look away, for to do so is to become lost in the world of hell you see before you, and to consign your friends and loved ones to the pain and suffering more terrible than your vision.

If you do not look away, he should nod slightly, then turn around again and reach into a drawer. He will pull out a book, a jar, and a key, all of which he will hand to you without saying a word. Turn around, saying nothing, and walk into the building. You do not need to ask directions; you will know automatically where to go, and do not stop until you get there.

When you reach the door, you will notice the intricate, beautiful design, inscribed with golden characters that seem vaguely Chinese, but not quite. Insert the key into the lock and turn it counterclockwise. You will hear a click, and then you should turn the knob. If it is locked, quickly turn the key back to its original position and pray to whichever god you worship that no one heard you, as someone is already inside, and you may have just assigned yourself and them to a fate worse than death.

If the door should open, walk inside, taking the key with you. The room will be as beautifully designed as the door. Sit on the bed, placing the jar on the bed in front of you. Take the key and unlock the cover of the book. Now would be a time to get comfortable, as the instructions inside this book are more important than anything you have ever read before in your life. The instructions are different for every Seeker, but the general gist format is this:

Take from your pocket the five golden rings you received from the Holder of the Five Rings. On the inside of each should be inscribed a character of a language unlike any you have ever seen. Open the jar on the bed, and you should hear a whispering in your ears, speaking of horrible and disgusting events. Pay no heed to their horrid games, for to do so is to become one of them and to feed on the depravity of those who share your goal. Place each ring inside one by one in an order detailed by the book. Memorize the order, for once you open the jar you cannot look away, no matter what, for the demons will take you as their slave for all of time. Do NOT, I repeat, do NOT touch the liquid inside the jar, as it will slowly eat away your body, leaving your soul suspended there for all of time. Do not put them in in the wrong order, for the jar will explode. If you do so, pray that it kills you instantly, for that is the easy way out.

Every time you put a ring inside the jar, the liquid will slowly begin to transform the rings. Each one is a different color once transformed, and appears to be made out of a different material: a ring which seems to be made of metal, whiter and brighter than any polished silver or white gold ring; a ring which appears to be made out of earth or mud, colored a deep, golden yellow; a ring of deepest black, which seems to be moving and swirling as if made of liquid; a ring of a mossy, forest green color which looks as if it is carved from wood; and a ring which seems to burn with a painfully bright crimson color.

Once all five rings have been transformed, the voices should die down, and eventually disappear. Then, and only then, should you remove the rings from the jar. Place them on your left hand, one by one, in the order in which you placed them in the jar from your thumb toward your little finger. Clench your first, close your eyes, and whisper, "How can They be controlled?" And then, in order of your rings, you should see five visions in your mind: a giant dragon whose scales shine the color of sapphires; a white-furred tiger of massive proportions; an immense tortoise, whose shell is black as the night; a qilin (Chinese animal) who shines the color of gold; and a vibrant, magnificent bird whose feathers seem to ripple with heat.

These animals will all begin to speak at the same time, of dark times, of darker times, of events which are yet to happen and those which already have, all of which are beyond terrible. They speak now of people who use the Objects for evil. Some people have gone mad right there, but if your will is strong and your heart is steadfast, you will be safe. Once they have finished speaking, they will disappear, and you will awake outside of the mental institution or halfway house you were inside, the rings still safe on your hand.

The rings will give you the power to control the ancient Chinese elements of earth, wood, fire, metal, and water: however, with each use the powers become harder to control until they consume you entirely. You have been warned.

These transformed rings are Object 379 of 2538. Learn to control them and learn to control yourself.

Object 380: The Holder of the Knowledge of Good and Evil

In any seedy pub, in any city, in any country, take a seat on the stool and ask the bartender for the strongest drink he has ever made. He will look at you apprehensively and ask, "Should I start you a tab?" As soon as he finishes mixing your drink, decline politely with "No, I'll just have one tonight." He will then place a dark green frothing drink before you on the counter. It will freeze and scald your throat at the same time, so drink it quickly.

When your drink is finished, pay only in cash, and insist on a second round. The bartender will refuse to serve you at first, but after a few tries, offer to pay in advance. He will grudgingly offer you a second drink. Drink this as fast as possible and smash the glass when you are done. You should pass out immediately. If you do not, or your head begins to ache, order whatever you wish. At this point, your fate can't get any worse. Enjoy yourself.

When you wake up, you should be inside a restroom. As fast as possible, empty your stomach by any means you can. It is important that you do so in some kind of bin or sink, however. The bartender would have to clean up your mess if you threw up on the floor. It would not be wise to make him clean up after you. The vomit you give up will be bloody and full of all that you've ever done wrong. Your wrongdoings will manifest as rust, hooks, barbs, and scraps of metal. If, at any time, you pause to let the pain subside, you will be consumed by your own evil and made to live out your life in a cesspool in the darkest reaches of your own mind.

When you are done, exit the bathroom. The bar will now be bustling with the night shift crowd. It will be full of the most maddening and sanity-destroying visages you have ever encountered. Show no emotion other than weary relaxation, and head toward the middle of the room. As you move, you will overhear a discussion of all the Seekers who have failed this test, and how they are being tormented even now. These descriptions will threaten to break you, but persevere, and do not allow your expression to slip. When you reach the center, you will find two men. They appear to be totally normal amid the madness surrounding you, but do not allow this to break your concentration.

The man on the left will be wearing a hat that, even amidst the horrible creatures, you will find odd. Ask him, "What were their crimes?" He will gesture for you to sit. When you do so, he will tell you in a melodic voice every atrocity They committed, and what horrors tie to the Objects. He will drone on for what may seem like centuries about the wars, the hate, that humanity has forgotten about. When he finishes, turn to his companion and ask, "What were their loves?" He will then tell you Their every passion, love, and cherished moment. He will tell you of art beyond comprehension, of honor beyond compare. And when he stops, look directly forward, between both of them, and ask only, "What caused the fall?" You will immediately be wracked with the pain of all creation's anger, and pass out.

When you awaken, you will find yourself at the bar, clutching the odd hat that the man on the left was wearing. You will know what brought the fall and why. Pay your tab, thank the bartender, and leave.

Wearing this hat will instantly allow you to see both sides of any issue. Be warned, however, that you may not like what you see.

The hat is Object 380 of 2538. Wear it at the risk of your ability to choose.

Object 381: The Holder of the Unknown

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, tell the receptionist that you intend to speak to "The Holder of the Unknown". The worker will take a deep breath, stand up, and guide you to the basement.

Despite being underground, the basement will be well-lit, as if there were windows open. If there is nobody there, flee or accept your death, for you have failed in your task and you are now being pursued by... well, let's not get into that. However, if there is a gray-haired old crone, you may ask her, "Why did they forget?"

She will proceed to bludgeon you with her cane. Endure the pain, for it's all you have left if you have chosen to visit this Holder. Do not be disturbed by the stinging, bleeding welts on your body that will form as she hits you. Finally, she will aim for your head to deliver a lethal blow; you must catch the cane in your hand before the blow lands and engage in a fierce tug-of-war, with the cane as the prize. Do not underestimate the woman's strength, because after all, she is a Holder. If you manage to take the cane, your task is not finished; you must kill the woman with her cane, swiftly and mercilessly. It will not be as easy as it looks; despite her age, the woman has uncanny stamina and cunning, and your only weapon is the cane, even if you brought along other Objects for use as weapons; she will see right through your attempts.

If you succeed, you will be allowed to leave, but do so quickly; you don't want to have to explain why one of the mental institution's patients is now dead by your hand.

The cane is Object 381 of 2538. Finding out why it isn't covered in blood is only the beginning.

Object 382: The Holder of the White Moon

In any city, in any country, go to any church or place of worship you can get yourself to. Find the father/leader of the place of worship and ask him to see someone who calls herself "The Holder of the White Moon". Should a peaceful smile come across his face, you shall know you came to the right place. He will lead you to a door that you didn't notice before, the door is a thing of beauty carved from pure white moonstone with a crescent moon inlaid with silver carved on the front. You need to only push the door open to enter and it shall close behind you.

You will find yourself in the night sky no matter what time of day you entered the building and will find no ground below you; do not panic, lest you fall from the sky and into the pits of hell, proof that you were unworthy for this task. However, if you manage to keep your wits about you, you will begin to drift to a large white cloud. As you land on that cloud, you shall see the Holder, a beautiful creature who's a cross between an elf and an angel. Fall to your knees and bow your head to this holy creature, only those with a pure soul can approach her.

The Holder will smile at you, lay her hand upon your head, and speak to you.

"Let the trial begin."

Instantly, you will be put through your own personal hell, all your fears shall strike you at once, all your loved ones shall die horrible pain-filled deaths. However, you must remain strong through what happens. If your heart weakens at these sighs, all of them shall come true. If your heart does not falter, you will be brought back to reality. The Holder shall sit upon her throne. Do not get up or move, to do so would be a sign of disrespect. She will ask you one question.

"What can burn through the darkness of the blackest night?"

You must answer, "The light of the white moon."

If you fail to answer correctly, well, let's just say that you should throw yourself off the cloud before her sister can take hold of you. If you answer correctly, she will tell you to rise and she will clasp a necklace around you. The necklace's beads are pure white malachite with soft gray stripes. You will then fall asleep. You shall awake on the steps of the place you worship. You now have the power to wield the light of the moon, but you will weaken in the light of the sun.

This necklace is Object 382 of 2538. You are now the guardian of the white moon, beware its dark twin.

Object 383: The Holder of Misery

One thing that, if you are lucky, you will not have faced in your travels is your own death. Prepare for that to change.

In any city, in any country, go to any funeral home or morgue that you can get yourself to. Find the head of the establishment and ask him if you can see "The Holder of Misery". A look of sheer pain should cross the man's face, and he will lead you into the building. If, at any time, the man begins to talk to you about the merchandise they sell, immediately get into the nearest coffin without a word. If you are lucky, when you open the coffin, you will not have been transported into the void.

If you did, indeed, enter the correct coffin, you should be in a large bedroom. This bedroom will look like the one at the place you call home, so feel free to get accustomed to the living space. Because, for now, you may only get happiness from it.

After what may seem like a few days, you will hear a loud, whining noise terminating perpetually from behind you. When you turn around to see what causes the noise, you will find a large array of items.

There is only one known list of items that has been completed, however, the list has been lost to most. However, there are rumors that the things you have can be only used for one thing.

Pick up the first item, any one of your choice, for this Holder has much leniency as to how he gets his entertainment. With this item, you must swiftly attack the only living thing in the room: yourself. This Holder demands his entertainment and you are his prime source. If you are wise, you will make it worth his while. Your death will be the only thing to sate his requirements.

Wake up for the final time. You will appear in the room which, at this point, will be soaked in your own blood. In the center of the room will sit a little man, slightly balding, with a bad combover. If he has a look of disappointment on his face, then you will be forced to relieve all of the painful deaths for all eternity, as punishment for the lack of good entertainment.

If, however, he was entertained enough, he will have a look of contentment, or even better, pleasure, over his face. He will congratulate you on a job well done, and allow you to ask one question. Ask the man, "Why must we perform for them?"

He will smile, as he begins to tell you why. It will be a maddening tale, one that tells what every person has ever contributed to the show, every suicide, every murder, and every madman performing. At this point, if you are still of sound mind, you will notice that he will be snickering to himself. Suddenly, the items will appear before you once again. He will tell you, "Continue the cycle, as I would like to watch."

Take the first item you used, turn to the man, and say, "I will continue the cycle, but I shall not be part of it," and quickly kill the man. He will laugh hysterically at this point, then slump over, dead.

The next time you wake up, you will be outside the funeral home or morgue you entered, the item you used first in your hands.

That item is Object 383 of 2538. All the world's a stage now. Will you play your part, or someone else's?

Object 384: The Holder of What Never Was

In any city, in any country, go to any hospital or large clinic that will permit you unquestioned entry. To the first person who offers help, ask for "The Holder of What Never Was". Their calming demeanor will vanish and they will point to a door that wasn't there before, a door that will sometimes be in the middle of an empty hallway, or a door that leads into the ground. By the time you have examined the door, this person will be gone. Their fate is similar to yours should you continue on.

Entering the door will cause you to feel an immense amalgamation of emotion. Guilt, sorrow, and regret will flood your mind. Relief and success will arise as well. You will not know what to feel. Do not let this phase you. Anything you do feel will not matter soon if you don't keep walking. You will not feel like walking. You will not be able to see anything other than your own body; surrounding you will not be any earthly hallway, but a void that is neither lit nor shadowed. Far in the distance you will see a figure slowly tumbling back and forth in a worn rocking chair. It is a bearded man wearing jeans and a white tank top.

As you silently walk down the hall, a voice that seems like an old man will start to become audible. He is laughing, reminiscing about things that will not make sense to you. Do not ponder them. Do not ask him about what he is saying. The man will merely look at you and nod if you try to communicate with him. He will laugh and shrug. It is almost comforting.

He will only speak coherently if you ask him this question: "How did it become?"

The old man will slowly stop rocking and stare into your eyes. Stare back or you will never leave this place. "Can you feel it? Surely you have before? The regret? The choices? Not knowing what could have been?"

He will laugh. And sigh. And he will reach into his pocket and produce a seemingly empty vial.

"This is the world's collective sigh... the reflection of what is in fiction, in false memory."

He will sink back into his chair and sigh once again.

"Do you remember? Did you remember? You can't. You know. You don't know. It never was, is, will be."

He will laugh, shaking his head, quietly rocking back and forth. It will be comforting. It will bring a smile to your face.

You will be back in the hospital, lying on a cold bed. If you are lucky, you are in the morgue.

The vial is Object 384 of 2538. They must never have existed.

Object 385: The Holder of the Plague

In just one special city, in one of the countries you've not yet been to, go to the cheapest motel located in its downtown core. You will know it by the smell and its dilapidated, rundown exterior. When you are sure you're alone in the lobby, approach the front desk, say absolutely nothing, and slip the attendant a small piece of paper with the words "I beg an audience with The Holder of the Plague" scrawled upon it. If anyone enters the lobby as this exchange takes place, your life is forfeit.

After absorbing the words of the note, a look of pity will cross the face of the attendant as his or her skin begins to bubble and blister, eyes turn black as the void, and unidentifiable insects begin to erupt from every orifice on the attendant's face. The poor soul will then raise its hand and point toward a series of doors lining the wall behind you that weren't there when you first entered. Wait for blackened pus to erupt from the attendant's finger, shooting its way across the room to mark the correct door. That is the door you must enter. If you've not been overcome with terror, make your way toward this door and do not look back at the attendant if you wish him or her to live.

The first thing you will notice as you cross the threshold of the door is the putrid stench that assaults your nostrils. Breathe deep these aromas of death, decay, and rot, for they imbibe your senses with the strength to handle a meeting with whom you seek. Second, you notice the walls, floors, and ceiling seem to be made of maggot-infested flesh - springy and squishy underfoot. You will then start to hear the dry crackling sound of biological decomposition, amplified and sped up a thousand-fold to pry at your sanity like a swarm of insects nesting in your ear. As you make your way further down the Hall of Disgust, foul-smelling blood will begin to rain down on you from the ceiling - do not try to wipe it away for it serves as yet another barrier to keep you safe from the dangers of this Holder.

If you've made it this far and have followed instructions to the letter, you will arrive at a door made from stitched-together, dismembered body parts. Place your hand on the door and focus your thoughts upon the Holder you seek. When your call is answered, piece by piece the door will begin to fall apart, starting from the top and making dull wet thuds as they hit the blood-slicked floor of maggots and meat. You may now enter the Oubliette of Infection.

Floating a few feet off the ground, suspended in the air by a swarm of dire-locusts, a blackened, humanoid form spasms with preternatural speed. "Seven times the before-death is found between the near and far. Where shall we place you?" the Holder of the Plague will ask you, his voice sounding inhales rather than exhaled and eerily coming from the walls instead of his face. Some of his insect minions will land at your feet and begin to crawl up your legs at this point, but try to pay them no heed - they are a distraction.

Walk up to the Holder, place your hand in the center of its chest, and in a strong voice, shout, "I am on His road. You will place me nowhere." Provided you took your time conquering the overloading of your senses while coming down the Hall of Disgust, you will have received enough of a blood-shield to protect you from the infection of the Holder of the Plague, and the Holder will explode in a blinding cascade of darkness - if not, you will die a slow, exquisitely agonizing death as you become part of the living structure this Holder's realm is made from, as so many before you have.

Return the way you came, running as fast as you can so as not to become the next Holder of this pocket-realm. Make your way home, wash the filth off, and fall asleep. When you awake the next morning, you will find a dark-green handprint upon your stomach that rests under your skin, not upon it as a tattoo would. It slightly twitches of its own accord, sending a violent itching to your nerve endings whenever it does.

You have found Object 385 of 2538. The Mark of Corrosion is now yours to call upon when needed.

Object 386: The Holder of the Living End

This Object is the three-hundred-and-eighty-sixth of the two-thousand-five-hundred-eighty-three Objects of the damned. 386, out of 2538. Think about it. Ingest it in your brain, and fathom it all. There are 2538 Objects, and this is the 386th in the series. Do you not understand? The Objects have been separated into 2538 parts, and they seek to reunite themselves. What you Seekers fail to understand is that your participation is not of your own accord, but rather, it is merely you playing your part in the game, so that they may come together.

And I'm sure you know what happens when they come together. I know it, of course. And I know I cannot stop it. Nobody can stop it. We are, after all, pieces to a game. Puppets tied to a string. Characters to a grotesque play. And we must play our parts, whether we like it or not.

What I do know, however, is what happens afterward. What happens after they all come together. And that is why I must let them come together. Why you must find me.

You will know when you need to find me. You will play your part. You will go to the nearest halfway house, as you've been doing for the past 380 odd Objects. You will ask for me. The person at the desk will play his part. He will quiver. He will whimper. And he will lead you to me. And that is where I play my part. I will hinder your progress. I will darken the path, and blind you with nothingness. I will whisper into your ear the voices of the damned, hoping to drive you insane. I will beckon you to move forward and ignore the darkness enveloping you. You will do so, for this is your part. And you must play your part.

You will reach the end of your journey. This trek toward the void will take its toll on you, and you will feel as if you are on the last legs of your life. But you will not falter. You mustn't. You will feel what is in front of you, and realize that there is a door. Push that door open. You must push the door open, for not only does your life depend on it, but the story too. And the story must continue.

I will then blind you with light, and you will find yourself in a room with an old man, and a table. That old man, of course, is me. Do not gaze at my face though, for you will be driven insane. Instead, you will look at the table in front of you. You will see a derelict chessboard on this table. You will sit on the chair in front of this table. I will then move the first piece.

You must defeat me at this game. Failure to do so will mean your demise in the darkness outside the room. Your victory, however, will be with you moving your queen to checkmate me. I will concede defeat, and offer my hand for you to shake.

You will not shake my hand, and instead, ask the question, "What happens after The End?"

I will then act surprised. I will then tell you what happens. What happens after they come together. No, more specifically, what happens after that. After the unspeakable apocalyptic horrors that ensue. I will tell you of the Resurrection. Their Resurrection. Of the Cycle of Life and Death. Of how They will scatter the Objects for a new generation of hopeless men and women to find. And of how They might rise and end it all. I will tell you all of this, and you will listen. I will tell you all of this, and you will listen. You must listen, for it is your part to listen. And you will understand the meaning of it all.

You will keep your composure, and you will have a deeper sense of understanding of this fleeting universe. You will know what I know, for you are worthy. For you are meant to know. You will then take the queen with which you have defeated me, and go out of the room. You will find yourself in darkness, and wake up to arrive outside from whence you came. You will have the queen in your hands.

You will then have Object 386 of 2538. For the pieces are now set in motion, and it is only a matter of time before their parts are played.

Object 387: The Holder of Disbelief

I fear, dear Seeker, that I will not last much longer. I have been running far too long, and it seems only fair to allow what is chasing me to catch up. After all, I am a criminal.

Allow me to explain.

It was a terribly stormy night in Rome, but my resolve was as solid as stone. It would be now or never, I decided. I was now a "Seeker".

The day before, I was just a normal citizen of the Roman Empire. The times were looking up, our great Empire under the rule of Julius Caesar had never looked better. The only thing I was worried about was wondering where I would buy the food to feed my family. For my beautiful wife, whose long, blonde hair I can remember, blowing so gracefully with the wind, for my beautiful boy, who aspired to be nothing more than his great father, and for my beautiful daughter, so young but whose future I could see was a good one. It was quite a beautiful day actually. The market was going crazy with business, laughs being heard, people dancing, cheerful music echoing the stone streets, the crops never selling much better.

As I left happily, slowly trotting down the sunny boulevard after quite a nice bargain for wheat and barley, a man approached me.

I could sense darkness irradiating from the tall man, a sense of impending doom, almost. Smiles of others who crossed his path soon faded, they must have felt it as well. His face resembled the feeling of void, empty eyes, and no detectable emotion emitting from his presence. His striking gray hair shone a dull yet powerful light. One word to describe him would be emotionless. Nevertheless, he greeted me and told me a story.

Told me I was special. Told me I was capable. Told me I played a certain part in this story, and my time drew nigh to act.

Curious as I was, questions plagued my mind. He knew. Looming down on me, he said he ran a very tight schedule. He bowed politely, and grinned at me, then left.

I'll never forget that wicked grin.

In my hand, he left a parchment. Told me to open it as soon as I got home, and treat it very secretly.

Which brings me to the stormy night. I exited my home, in the very crowded back streets of Rome. Entering the main avenue, I gazed up to the heavens. Seems as if the gods were not very pleased, massive thunderstorms grouped above the land, towering over the mountains in the distance. Shuffling through the cold, eroding stone streets, puddles were forming everywhere. My cloth hood and cloak soon soaked up the rain, leaving me in a terrible mood and terrible level of comfort.

Great, I can tell I'm going to love this "seeking" business.

With whatever light the waning room could offer me, I found the small side road listed in my instructions. Wedged between two lower-class establishments, I soon found the alchemist shop. Strange, I had never seen this shop before. And yet it was midnight, and the candles were lit, open for business.

Slowly ducking under the low door, I shed my wet cloak. After all, I wouldn't be needing it where I was going. As listed, I sought the old, blind woman at the desk. And, thankfully, I could smell the incense which were burning around her desk. It was said that if they were not lit, then my journey would soon come to an end.

After much gazing around, I finally said to the hag, "Show me the item I have come here to seek, for none here know of my desire." A look of disbelief erupted from her face, seemingly rendering her paralyzed. Now was when I had to act, described by my letter. I quickly entered the back chamber and sat down on the old hag's cushion, in her meditating chambers. A sensation of weariness instantly overtook me, and I was out like a light.

A shaking rattled me awake. I looked around the room, to see the shelves tossed about and wrecked, seeming as a hurricane had swept through the chamber. I looked around for my note, but it was not to be found. Just like it had explained.

I crawled under the broken doorframe and into the store. The incense had gone out, and the hag was nowhere to be seen. The candles still shone, all of the products still in their location. Curious, I exited the store slowly.

To tell you I was ready for the next event would be flat-out lying.

As the curtain whipped open, I stood mouth open, gazing at the sky. The clouds had grown to a monstrous size, swelling up like a sting. They shed a red light down on the land.

That being the next subject.

As I exited the solemn road entering the main avenue, I gazed around to behold the wreckage and pillaging. No one present. All of the stores running along the side of the road had been cracked in half or completely destroyed, reduced to rubble. As I remembered, the note told me to find the highest point in the city. Gazing up at the Great Legislative building, I slowly began my trek through the mess.

I learned that as I approached the center building that the shadows had begun to grow long. Abnormally long. Almost seemed as if they were moving. Casting the strange thought aside, I continued to trek along the road. It was silent as could be, only the wicked wind whipped through the boulevard.

Nothing special happened on the way to the building until I arrived at the massive front gates. The once-glittering golden gates had lost their normal shine, reflecting a dull light that barely lit up three meters out. As I entered the front gate, preparing to enter the very building, I heard a small pebble move.

My heart raced as I quickly swung around. The shadows I had been believing to be growing, in reality, had been. And now, as they arose, I knew that a pleasant end would not await me if I lingered. Heart beating, I entered the half-destroyed building.

It was a long trip to the top, climbing a seemingly unending staircase. But the climax of the trip came as I saw the hatch above me which led to the top. The light began to fade, and as I gazed behind, I heard wicked sounds, belonging to the shadow beings I had recognized on the ground.

The hatch blasted open as I flew through, adrenaline pumping. A balcony awaited me, a single golden telescope perched on the edge, barely teetering over the edge, pointed to the red clouds. As I approached the telescope, I heard the sky open, almost deafening me with the blast of thunder that followed. I could sense the impending doom of the shadows approaching. Without wasting time, and hands shaking, I grasped the telescope and peered in.

Through a break in the thunderclouds, I peered at a peculiar set of stars arranged almost uncannily like a human being. This one seemed old, though. The stars came to life as an old, bent being, with a silvery beard and dark hood, trotted around the heavens. He finally stopped, gazing me in the eye.

The thunderclouds boomed, and without introduction, he told me of a story. A great battle of the Universe that humanity lived so blindly in face of. He told me of everything, every detail, every little thing which had happened to this point, but worst of all, what was sure to come if They should reunite them.

When the wise man ended his speech, he asked me but one question, "Now you know of the secrets, you must keep quiet this council. But will you act?" And with that statement, the stars returned back to their normal arrangement, and the clouds viciously spread over the sky.

Drawing away from the telescope, one last task was left of me. I firmly grasped the telescope and pulled it from its handles. Mounting the thin balcony, I gazed down. Thousands of shadows over the city were swarming my position. I could feel a dark presence among them. At that exact moment, the hatch blew open.

And I jumped. And I looked back.

I will never forget that wicked grin.

I woke up the next morning in my bed, telescope gripped firmly in my arms. Insanity slowly began to corrupt my once-sane mind. My visions shrouded my thoughts. I had become lost inside of me. There was blood on the wall, in the shape of mysterious runes, which I cannot describe to this day. Mustering whatever strength of will remained in me, I fell out of bed, crawling to my bloodied door. Grabbing the handle, I slowly hoisted myself up, legs trembling, completely absent of color.

What awaited me on the other side I will never forget.

My precious wife, my precious children, were thrown to the ground with wrists cut open, blood shining almost like the man's gray hair, an absent, pale gleam. Their faces bore slashes and cuts, as well as tears. I collapsed, weeping over my once-beloved family.

What have I done...

I am a criminal now, running, but soon I shall grow tired. I am running from myself, from the shadow in my mind, for I know that I cannot cope with my visions. I cannot cope with the consequences of my actions.

The telescope I bear is Object 387 of 2538. Sanity is such a precious thing, I now see. Dare you risk it for the truth?

Object 388: The Holder of Bliss

In your own house, in your own city, secure all doors, windows, and points of entry/exit. Remove all mirrors and objects of the same theme from the entire house. Begin to circle the house, following the outside wall. Should you come across a spot of intense heat, leave. Don't bother going inside to get your possessions, they're lost now. However, should you find a cold spot, feel free to proceed back inside.

Say aloud, "I wish to see the Holder of Bliss." Speak clearly, with confidence. If you hear no audible reply, return everything to how it was before you started, you've failed. The Holder of Bliss isn't much of a threat to anyone, but I wouldn't recommend trying again. Should you hear "I am the one you seek," then yell at the top of your lungs: "Then show me the path!"

You will immediately feel a strange sensation.

"...the cold wash of anesthesia hit me it swept over me, a wave that started at the tip of my nose, rushing across my face to my head, running down my neck to my chest, crashing into a warm golden explosion in my stomach, my groin, a blessed sensation beyond the peak of orgasm and relief of nausea, as every muscle in my body relaxed and my head lolled gently on my shoulder, every sense unwinding, unburdened of the crushing weight of pain I never even knew that I had: the rush, the wave, death, heaven, completion. For hours and hours. The hit. Sensual ultimatum..."

You will awaken to find everything as it was the day before. Mirrors still hanging and house unscathed. Check all of your mirrors, as one will be broken, all the shards scattered in the area. Find the one shard that doesn't show your reflection. This is Object 388 of 2538. From this day forward, colors will seem less vivid, food will taste bland, and even the most beautiful piece of music will seem like a dull hum. May nothing ever feel the same again.

Object 389: The Holder of Magnetism

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. Be sure to bring one bar magnet in each pocket, and DO NOT LET THEIR OPPOSITE ENDS TOUCH THE ONES OF THE OTHER.

Tell the clerk in a voice no louder than a whisper: "Bring me the Holder of Magnetism." The clerk will nod and take you down one of the hallways. If she doesn't nod, and asks you to leave, take the magnets and ease them together, the north pole of the one in your left hand to the south pole of the one in your right hand. Do not let them touch, or you will be hounded from the building. Feeling threatened, the clerk will take you down the left hallway to Room 983. If you had to use the magnets now, put them back in your pockets. With the clerk reaches for the door, tell her it is fine, that you can take it from here. She will tell you that it is your funeral (which it usually is, for only the most prepared Seekers can get any further).

Open the door, but take care, as the door is made of metal and hooked up to a dormant shock generator. If a magnet touches that door, the generator will start up, and you shall be electrocuted. When you go inside, turn on the lights and close the door, in that order. A dark figure will ask you to play a little game with you. If you have the ball, you're safe from this point on. Give the figure the ball. Take out the magnets. If you have ever experienced static cling in your life, the magnets will bind themselves to you, and your entire being will become magnetized. If you did not give the figure the ball, the figure will take an ordinary playground ball, and coat it in searing metal, hotter than all of the stars and cosmos put together. Every time the figure throws the ball to you, you must be able to bounce it back to him. If you don't, it will be doing one of two things. The throw could be so hard that you get slammed into the door, or the ball will stick to your magnetic body; its searing metal welded to you forever, and you will live as an outcast. Your only hope for passing this trial is the shield. The number of throws that you must return is different for every Seeker.

If you pass, he will free you of your magnetic form, and take off the metal on the ball, and give it back to you. He will then take out another ball, and you will feel that your other Objects are being pulled out of your hands or pockets. Clench them tightly. Fail to do so and lose them forever.

Finally, ask the being: "How can they bring the Objects together?" He will answer with Object 389 of 2538.

Object 390: The Holder of the Eight Directions

At any airport you find yourself at, buy a ticket to wherever "The Holder of the Eight Directions" is going. The worker will give you a double-take. While she is looking away, check to your left to see if there is something green in color; it doesn't matter what it is, as long as it's green. If there isn't, the Holder knows you are after her and will take action. When the worker looks back at you with an expression of realization, tell her, "I'm past any misgivings about this. Please let me on the flight."

The worker will hand you a ticket and a black boarding pass with red lettering, looking at you like you're not of this world. Take the ticket to the gate specified. It is a different flight and gate for everybody, but if it is a minor, small airline, and not one of the major ones, fling your boarding pass as far away from you as you can and flee.

No matter where you are sitting on the flight, while it is still boarding, a middle-aged woman will sit next to you. This is the Holder. "Man, this is hectic," she'll say. "What does it take to get anywhere around here?" Keep a smirk on your face while she's rambling. She'll eventually shut up, but not until long after the plane has left the ground.

Even if the destination didn't specify this, it will be a trans-ocean flight. The woman next to you has been telling her story, so if you haven't been paying attention, you won't have noticed her asking you where you're going, and the fight will carry you to your next existence... if you're lucky.

You must tell her, "I seek the Eight Directions." She will smile at you and ask, "And what will you do with them?" You must speak to her, in a condescending tone: "Why, make them one, of course, for that is what they truly are."

If you did this right, she will say, "Excuse me, I have to use the restroom," and walk away. Now this is very important. You must do this step perfectly, else the woman will return early, something you do not want to happen.

The instant you see her turn her back, you must close your eyes and count to 390. You may do this silently or out loud. Do not skip a number, do not open your eyes, and do not go back, because you are only asking for worse trouble than you're already in. I would recommend counting slowly; the longer you keep your eyes closed, the less you'll see.

When you reach 390, you'll hear the pilot telling the passengers it's time to prepare for landing. Open your eyes. You'll hear the bathroom door opening behind you, and the woman will rejoin you. Abandoning all pretense, the woman will ask: "Are you positive?"

With as much sarcasm as you can muster, put on a façade of considering her question for a few seconds, but finally tell her, "Yes," almost as if you're frustrated with her dragging her heels.

If you did this right, she will reach into her purse and hand you a compass that appears to point erratically unless you know how it works.

The compass is Object 390 of 2538, and it always points toward Their reunion.

Object 391: The Holder of Sentience

In any city, in any country, go to the nearest university, library, or other place of higher learning. Ignore the person at the front desk, and simply continue walking. You must find this Holder yourself, without any assistance. You will soon happen upon a hallway in a seemingly impossible or implausible area of the building. Enter it, lest the opportunity fade away, forever.

The hallway seems normal at first, even instilling a sense of bliss upon you. However, after a few minutes of walking, you will begin to be consumed by feelings of inadequacy, and a realization of your own insignificance in the universe. These thoughts can be staved off depending on your level of intelligence and willpower, but the process is nonetheless inevitable. If you reach the end of the hallway before collapsing into complete insanity, then you will enter a room containing a man in white robes, seemingly more real and solid than anything else around him, including you. He will be consumed by his work, performing actions that seem mundane yet you will still be unable to comprehend them. You will feel like you are a dream, losing control of your thoughts and fading away. Act quickly, for the Holder will only respond to one question: "What is my role in this story?"

The hooded figure will instantly focus his attention on you, validating your existence. He will instill his knowledge upon you, speaking eloquently and expanding your mind with the story of your actions and their consequences, of your decisions, and the factors that led to them. His very words will awaken your mind, and you will realize what you must do. After all is said and done, he gives you a grave warning, a warning that could very well change reality itself. After he is done, you will be allowed to leave. Leave quickly, for no one who took their time has been around to share their story.

After you leave, your mind will not be able to sustain the whole of his speech. His very words will fade from your consciousness, leaving only an imprint, easily forgotten. If you can, you must focus and try your hardest to remember one thing above all else: his warning. Without it, you are doomed to failure.

When your thoughts clear, you will find yourself in possession of a new Object. The Object is not a physical item, it is an idea. And that idea is Object 391 of 2538.

Object 392: The Holder of the Mist

In any city, in any country, go to the nearest pond or lake on a cloudy night. Point your finger thrice to the sky and call for the clouds to descend from their perch. If they heed your call, and a mist begins to roll in from the water then remain stationary. If not, then quickly jump into the water and stay under until you can hold your breath no more. If you are not killed when you emerge, then try again on the next full moon.

However, if the mist does roll in from the water, then consider yourself lucky. Walk slowly forward, do not fear the water, for it shall never touch your feet. As you travel further into the mist, horrible screams will grace your ears. Roars of animals not seen by man will rip through the air, but do not fear, while you walk in the mist none shall touch you. If the mist begins to thin, quickly turn and walk in a different direction, for leaving the mist will result in a quick death.

After what seems like hours of wandering, rays of light will begin to pierce the cloudy world. Keep walking until you emerge onto a vast arid desert. There will be a swarthy man with a turban sitting next to a large cactus. This is the Holder of the Mist. Do not approach him, you must stand in the hot sun without water until a tumbleweed blows by. Once that happens, you may approach the man.

There is but one question you may ask him, "What happens when they can see no more?"

The man will grunt, and reach inside of his turban to pull out a water-skin. If he drinks from the water-skin, then prepare to die slowly from dehydration. However, if he hands you the skin, sprinkle a little bit of its contents on the ground and the mist will return. Walk into the mist and do not stop until you are back at the body of water where you started.

This water-skin is Object 392 of 2538. When you cannot see, the only way left is forward.

Object 393: The Holder of the Blast

In any city, in any country, go to the largest office of public affairs, whether that be a town hall or city council building. At the front desk, ask, "May I speak with the one who swims in a sea of refuse?"

The person at the desk will do one of two things: If he/she asks you to repeat the question or gives you a funny look, then you've probably not gone to the right office. If, however, they say to look in your bible, then leave and go straight home.

If you have a bible, open it when you are in the room you feel the most at home in. If you lack a bible, any religious text that names an evil deity somewhere within its pages will work. The page does not matter, just begin reading wherever you open it for the next hour. Many people find this task impossibly difficult, and give in after thirty minutes; persist until you hear something grinding.

Look up and behold a landscape of torment. No words can describe the realm, it often bends and escapes reality. Just try and scan the horizon.

Look for a large steeple of living blood, and pray it isn't inside-out or upside-down. You can try to walk to it, but it's a long and difficult trip, and you're likely to be killed before reaching it. Say loudly in its direction "CLOSE MY DOORS TO HEAVEN!" if you want to get there quickly. Just don't expect pity from above if something happens while here.

Inside, a sermon will be going on. The "preacher" will be mounted on a pile of bodies, with a podium made from their limbs. Do not listen to him, for he is much like the Holder of Deception, and will enslave the weak-willed and evil to his bidding. He holds a book in his hands at all times; do NOT look in this book, ask for this book, or describe it in detail to anyone. I've probably already written too much.

Walk until you stand below his podium and ask, "Do you believe god made them?"

He will stop preaching and bow his head. If you closed the doors of heaven, he will then start humming a tune that will buzz in your head forever, until your death. If you managed to walk to the steeple, and without cursing god, then he will go straight to drawing a knife from his robes, placing a hand on the podium, and with little difficulty, cutting it off. If he cuts off his right hand, you will be able to understand and sympathize with his position as a Holder, and forever be favored in all courts of hell. If he cuts off his left hand, his form will morph into an indescribable light, and he will tell you the one thing you need to know most in the coming days of your life. Both are valuable to have, but even more valuable is the hand he has removed.

Step up to the podium (he will move for you), take the hand, and place your religious text into it. Open the text, and pray that the words aren't backward. This is the worst fate to ever befall any man, one he cannot prevent, for in order to return home you must begin reading the text aloud to his congregation. After reading for a long period of time, something sharp will pierce your skull from behind, and you will fall unconscious. When you awake, anything you were holding (including the hand and bible) when you left will be with you in that room of your house you started in. Pray you brought nothing else but the hand, and be careful not to ever take the hand into holy grounds; they might not like it.

His hands are Object 393 of 2538. They will hold all the others when the end comes.

Object 394: The Holder of the Returned Hope

"They must never come together. Never."

 

Dear Seeker,

This is a child of destiny. You may or may not know the story of how he came about, but I have little time to include all details, as many of the Others are after me.

Please take care of this child. I feel so guilty and terrible for not caring for him myself, but I am being followed, relentlessly, by a horde of terrible beings intent on my destruction (and that is just to begin with) and I do not want this precious child, whom I grew to love, to be in the same sort of danger that I am in, although I admit because of what and who he is, he will eventually come across Them.

He is known as the Child of Passions and Innocence. This is his title; give him any name you wish, but you must know that this is what he is called.

I must finish this letter, for I have heard the first telltale sounds that mean I should be on the move.

Sincerely,

The Holder of Returned Hope

 

I am weary and disillusioned. I hardly recognize who, or what I am supposed to be. I've lost track of how many names I was given. Only one thing remains, steady as ever. This was a mantra, repeated to me my whole life. By the time I was self-aware enough to have an image, my parents disappeared from my life and I never knew who they were. All anyone would ever tell me was my title.

I was a feisty little one, as would be known. It was no secret even to me that I am vastly intelligent. Depending on who you talked to, I was supposed to be born years in the past to show them some of the advanced ways of thinking that I always showed, years in the future where I truly belonged, and yet others said that the fact that I exist right now should be important enough for everybody.

Eventually, I stumbled across an archive of urban legends, and was intrigued to see them. Somewhere, a Seeker of Holders has recovered from childbirth years and years ago, and may or may not want... its offspring.

Allow me to tell you about the visions. One of them, in particular, makes me fear for my very being every time it shows up. A man holding a strange Object in his hands is staring me in the face and telling me a horrible story. Every fiber of my being is tempting me to look at the Object, but every awareness I can hold on to during his story is telling me to keep contact with his eyes. I have seen several instances of this, and maybe four or five times out of hundreds, whoever I am seeing through manages to focus on the man's eyes throughout the whole tale.

I have met and dealt with several people and beings who know what I am. They have even told me vivid tales of Holders such as Salmacis, Vibration, and Phlogiston. The Holder of Salmacis, in particular, disturbed and intrigued me, because it was a possible glimpse of my parentage.

Based on research that I undertook involving going deeper than these notes go, I was able to determine that I am the 394th of 2538 Objects, the Child of Passions and Innocence. I know what I must do. Do you?

Object 395: The Holder of Satisfaction

The Seeker of Holders is the only one who will manage to accomplish this task. If this is you, then proceed if you dare.

In any city, in any country, dapper yourself up to the nines and go to any upscale restaurant you can get yourself to. If you have to make a reservation, do so. A fast-food joint simply will not do for this quest; the Holder is the most particular creature there ever was, is, or will be.

When you arrive, ask the maître d' if "The Holder of Satisfaction" is eating here. It does not matter if it's a man or woman maître d', nor does it matter if the Holder is taking on a male or female form. All that is important for this is that the guardian addresses you by your name in response; if they do not, then move on to another restaurant.

There may or may not be several others sharing a meal with the Holder, but whatever the case, the guardian will mention you, by name, to the Holder.

Whatever form the Holder takes, he, or she, will stop everything they're doing and look you right in the eye. Their expression will be deliberately unreadable; you will not be able to tell if they are angry, pleased, sad, or simply confused that you are here. No matter how long you are stared down, do not look away. Even if you blink, you're taking a risk far greater than simply seeking Holders.

If the Holder's eventual reaction is anything other than a deep, hearty laugh, you will have to kill it, right then and there, force the wig off its head, and escape the restaurant. Consider yourself extremely lucky if the Holder laughs and hands you the wig; it is known for its vanity.

The wig is Object 395 of 2538. There has to be a finishing touch.

Object 396: The Holder of Respiration

In any city, in any country, go to any college or university you can get to. Head to the science lab on campus to any class that has just begun pertaining to anatomy or the biological structure of human beings. When you enter, if the professor asks why you are late or acknowledges your arrival, leave, for this is not the right classroom. When you do find a classroom, maybe with a late professor, sit in the back row and wait until the lesson is over. Catch the professor's attention before he/she leaves and make sure you are the last "student" in the classroom. If you are not, and ask for "The Holder of Respiration", those remaining will tear your flesh from your body and gnaw on the remains.

When you ask to see this particular Holder, do not lose confidence in yourself: the professor knows of your demise and he/she may be the cause of it. Once asked, however, the professor will ask you to meet him/her in his/her office at the last 15 minutes he/she remains at school. You agree and leave. Do not search for any other Objects during this wait. This particular search has already begun, and is a one-shot ordeal. Do not speak to any student on campus, even if you recognize them. Until this task is over, the students will be possessed by demons of unimaginable horrors, and to speak to one will release it unto you, torturing you whilst shouting for other demons to join in your forthcoming death.

If you survive long enough to see the professor in his/her office, he/she will lead you into a hallway of which the end seems non-existent. He/she will soon speak of the lesson earlier and how you felt about it. You must reply that you are not a student; any other answer will leave you breathless and the students-possessed will take your body into Hell, where you will spend an infinity of eternities. The professor will nod if you answered correctly and will leave you, bidding you good luck.

As you walk alone, the air will get thick and your chest will strive to expand, but you must keep moving. They are watching your every move, waiting to strike. Your blood will move slowly; your heart will slow its cadence. The ever-increasing lack of air is obvious and you may feel your brain shutting down.

A door appears. You should be crawling now, sweat falling off your brow like bullets. The door swings open as you slowly inch upon it. Do not stop, keep moving forward. Even with the strong being awaiting your arrival, the beasts behind you do not stop their pursuit; they cannot curb their hunger for your flesh.

One finger is all that is needed over the threshold to this new, oxygen-rich room. The being that awaits you will snatch you up and slam the door on the creatures so near.

This entity is massive and coated in red and black fur. He is grinning with yellow-white teeth, but seems sympathetic to your harsh journey. He beckons you to pet him, which you should, if you choose. His fur is as soft as silk and his slow breathing is a comfort to you. You look upon his face and see bright blue eyes and a small, bony horn atop his head that gleams in the light of this haven.

This creature is the Holder of Respiration and will gladly give up his Object, though he seems to be oblivious to his fated duty. He just enjoys your touch, for he has not felt this content for what seems like an eternity.

This happiness will be short-lived, for you are the Seeker and must continue in your quest. Tell the beast, "I need your Object, Holder!" The beast will be confused for a quick moment but soon nod like an excited puppy. The nodding will turn violent and his fur will shed quickly, revealing rotting skin and muscle tissue. Those blue eyes begin to burn red and shade to black like coal. The beast is now enraged and the air in this room begins to thicken. You will surely die first, for his lungs have more air capacity. Through rotting tissue, you should notice a glimmer in his stomach. This is what you must acquire before his hellbeast devours your soul. How you acquire it is your choice.

If you grab the Object, you will end up in the professor's classroom, where you sat before, with a glittering orb in your hand. If the beast takes your life, hope that you go straight to Hell; an eternity with him is far worse.

This glittering orb is Object 396 of 2538. It holds the souls of Seekers failed. Will yours join the collection?

Object 397: The Holder of Crushed Aspirations

Greetings, Seeker. It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance. My name is not important, and just by reading this, you've already told me yours.

But I digress. In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. Grab the clerk roughly by the lapels, lift him into the air, and demand to see "The Holder of Crushed Aspirations". His eyes will roll back in his head, and heat will course through him. This heat will be like none you have ever experienced, and will slowly spread through your body, reducing you to ash as it goes. However, you are not being incinerated, I'm simply transporting you to my realm. If you attempt to move away from him before it has been complete, the parts of you that have been transferred will stay on my plane of existence, and the rest of you will not. Endure the searing pain, as I'd honestly rather meet you in one piece.

Once you in your entirety have reached my realm, you (as many Seekers do) will be horrified to realize that the ground, nay, the entire planet upon which you now walk is made of flesh and muscle. Trees of bone grow taller than buildings, high into the blood-red sky. A faint wind plays across the uninhabited, organic landscape. It is at this point that I feel it important to inform you of a rather unpleasant fact: My world is made from the flesh and bone of Seekers before you. However, they are all long dead. "Eternal suffering" this, "hellish damnation" that, it's all so annoying. If you die in my realm, you will die, and your corpse will be reassembled into my world. It's that simple. In addition, nothing will harm you here until you are ready. When you are prepared to face my test, stand under a bone-tree and shout, "I accept your challenge, Holder! Your power is nothing to my will!"

After you say this, an ornate sword made of bone will fall from the tree, landing neatly in your hand. Subsequently, out of the fleshy earth will rise a replica of yourself. Although it will not actually be you, per see; it will be you as you always wanted to be. It will be you if you made all the right choices, gained complete control of your body and mind, and exercised yourself to your fullest potential. It will be your hopes of personal gain embodied. It will be armed with a sword identical to yours. That is the test, Seeker - you must defeat it. Its skill will be what you always wished you had, and will be superior to yourself. Do not, however, think that I want you to be killed. This is simply a test, as I can't simply meet with every imbecile who fancies himself a Seeker. Do your best to defeat your own aspirations - I warn you if will be difficult. However, I do wish for you to succeed. If you manage to defeat your own hopes and dreams, drive your sword through the heart of your aspirations.

You have little time at this point, as it will recover quickly. This simulation of your own ambitions is nourished by the entire planet, after all. You must ask it the question: "Who crushed His dreams?" It will tell you. It will tell you how He was once human, but was destroyed utterly, mind and soul. It will tell you how He turned to darkness, and what role the Objects play in it all. This knowledge is not meant for the feeble minds of humans, and many a Seeker has willingly surrendered himself to my world, only to end the pain this understanding brings. However, should you survive, your aspirations will remove your sword from its chest and ram it into your own. After you wake up, you will be lying in the bed of the place you call home. I will probably be on the floor near you, or next to you on your bed. I like to change my form occasionally, so I cannot tell you what I will be when you find me. However, if you touch me, you will hear my voice, and my dreams will become yours.

I am, after all, Object 397 of 2538. I dream of our Reunion, and I shall teach you to as well.

Object 398: The Holder of Chirography

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself "The Holder of Chirography". The worker will look sternly at you and reach into his desk and hand you a silver pen. Take the pen from his fingers and hold it firmly in your left hand. The pen will be ice cold in your grasp, but you must not let go of it. The worker will then ignore you and go back to his duties. Turn around and walk directly to the door behind you. The door has no handle, but will open for you when you approach. Enter the door and wait for it to close before continuing.

You will find yourself in a long stone hallway adorned with torches on the walls. Throughout the hallway, you will hear continuous scratching sounds, as of many quills writing on parchment. If, at any time, the scratching sounds stop, immediately and without pause plunge the silver pen into your eye. This is infinitely preferable to what will happen to you if you do not.

Continue down the hallway, taking care to never look back from your journey. You will walk for what seems a very long time, but continue onward. No matter how long the path leads, do not stop for rest for any reason; walk steadily until you reach the end. When you finally do reach the end of the hallway, stop before the blank wall and sit down and close your eyes. This is the only place where it is safe to rest. Take extra care to not fall asleep while you are resting, for if you do you will never wake up. When you feel you are able to continue, stand up and open your eyes.

Around you will be a garden with gravel paths leading through the trees and hedges. The sky will be an oppressive gray and the air infused with a dull light, though there is no sun to warm you. Wander the pathways but never step off of them or tarry to inspect the fauna growing beside them. Eventually, you will meet a young man with long gray hair dressed in a robe and holding a book and feather quill. Under no circumstance look at the pages in his book, for to do so would mean your certain end. He will smile at you pleasantly and greet you. If you choose to talk to him, know that all things he tells you are the truth but be careful. The innocuousness of things might be enough to plunge you fully into madness, never returning.

If you are brave enough to have spoken with him or even if you choose to say nothing, afterward, ask him politely for the quill that he carries. He will shake his head and decline your request, explaining that without the quill he would not be able to do what he is there to do. Raise up the pen still in your left hand and offer it to him in exchange. He will take the pen from you and hand you the quill in return. Avoid touching the red liquid that drips from the point and take it by the feather part. Even if the feather squirms in your hand, do not drop it or you will never see the waking world again.

The man might continue trying to speak with you, but trust nothing he says any longer. Say nothing until he finishes and turns to leave. Follow him wherever he goes until he passes through another door. Let him enter the door and close it behind him before following suit. You will find yourself outside the building, the quill still in your hand.

The quill is Object 398 of 2538. Use it only once to write the proper inscription.

Object 399: The Holder of the Unseen Color

In any town, in any country, go to any soup kitchen or optometrist's practice. When you reach the front of the queue, ask for "The Holder of the Unseen Color". They will feign ignorance, but should you repeat the name loud and often enough they will relent and take you through a curtained doorway into a back room. The room will be long and narrow, with a single hard wooden chair at one end, and a white wall at the other. It will be lit only by a single, bare flickering lightbulb, suspended from the ceiling.

The lightbulb will burn out. Do not leave the chair.

You will hear clacking, chirping rustling, as though a thousand noisome beetles were crawling toward you in a shifting carpet of chitinous black. The noise will draw closer and closer, until it feels as though they are beneath your very feet. The noise is hungry. Do not leave the chair.

A voice, not like any you have heard since your childhood nightmares, will breathe beautiful things into your ear. Mistaking it for a hallucination will be impossible; its hot, wet breathing will caress the skin of your ears and neck. With the most glorious words in existence, it will describe what it will do to you - what it did to you. Do not leave the chair.

The world will seem to invert about you; up becomes down, down becomes up, and you will instinctively grasp the seat or legs of the chair in an irresponsible urge to keep yourself from falling into the unfathomable dark below. Do not let go of the chair.

Hanging in the pitch darkness, you will be assaulted with questions in howling voices. They promise a reward of light. The questions will seem easy; you may even know the answers to some of them. Do not answer any of them.

One voice will sound above all others. It will ask you its name. You must reply: "Methuselah." Pronounce it correctly, or he will be displeased.

It will describe the unseen color. You do not see this color with your eyes, and will perceive it wherever you look. You cannot hide from this color behind your eyelids. It will lead you closer to the next Object, if you let it. Do not let it.

That Object is 399 of 2538. No man has ever been blinded by darkness.