I inherited a pub in the city.
My regulars aren't regular.
When I first got the call to say I'd been left a pub as inheritance, I didn't believe it. My parents had died while I was young and I grew up in foster care, not knowing any of my relatives.
When I was then told that the pub, previously belonging to my estranged spinster Aunt Darlene, was called The Pickled Gnome I almost laughed the solicitor off the telephone.
A few days after the call legal documents dropped through my letterbox. Despite my initial concerns everything seemed to be legit. I was to deal with a solicitor named Norman, who was the executor of Aunt Darlene's will.
The Pickled Gnome was situated by a city park, in a residential area with a few tower blocks and some council housing. I'd always been a small-town girl, none of the foster parents I'd lived with were from a built-up area. It came with a 3 bedroom apartment upstairs, a huge alcohol cellar, and a quaint little beer garden.
I didn't know the first thing about running a pub, the Gnome was miles away from my home, and I'd never met or heard of Aunt Darlene. But as I held the deeds and sat on the bed of my rented studio flat staring at the flaking, magnolia walls I made a decision to change my life. I packed up all my worldly belongings, totaling only one suitcase, and prepared my cat, Cheeses, for our new life.
The Gnome wasn't what you imagine when you hear of a city pub. It was like a strange relic, an antique of old Britain frozen in time. It was very much a local pub, with no other drinking establishments its side of the park and it had a thriving local community around it. Norman assured me that the business was perfectly viable, that I should be able to live quite comfortably, in fact.
The whole interior was wooden, there were hops strung across the ceiling, and vintage spirit bottles filled with lights decorating the interior. The bar was a deep mahogany, the varnish atop well worn, showing chips and scratches. At the end of the bar sat a small statue of a gnome lying on his back with his feet in the air.
"Looking truly pickled!" Norman winked, laughing a little too much at his own, poor joke.
The walls were covered in colorful, abstract paintings. Norman informed me that my aunt had been a keen painter and most of the artwork was her own. He showed me up to the apartment and I wished that her artistic flair had stretched to that too; unfortunately, it hadn't.
In fitting with the atmosphere of the pub the home upstairs was like its own time capsule, this time of gaudy '70s decor. It wasn't to my taste, but I was grateful I no longer had to sleep in my kitchen. Most of the furniture had been left behind, I was relieved I didn't have to buy it. The apartment was spacious and light and it had potential. Aunt Darlene had even left a slightly battered yet glorious-looking cactus by the living room window that I looked forward to rescuing.
I wished Norman a nice day and settled into my new home. Cheeses loved exploring the bar and all the nooks and crannies underneath it. I started to warm to the idea of running the place. Imagining me and Cheeses serving all the locals, not having to worry about money anymore. I felt so blessed.
Getting the Gnome ready to open was hard work. It took about a month of deep cleaning and getting a personal license and suppliers organized. Aunt Darlene had left the business in a healthy place, I was able to get everything done without it costing me anything.
She had also left behind a permanent staff member, Douglas, who I opted to keep on. Douglas was an older man, but not yet nearing retirement age. He had graying hair and a rotund exterior and claimed to have worked for my aunt for 10 years. He couldn't wait to get the place up and running again and told me how much the regulars had been missing it.
Douglas was a godsend. He showed me all the quirks of the pumps and how to operate and work with the traditional pub systems. Cheeses loved him, she would purr and butt her head against his legs whenever he was in the room. I believe you should always take note of what your pets think of a person, so he was in my good books.
The night I finally opened the doors it was such a relief. I didn't want to change much, I wanted to keep the same vibe Darlene had. Douglas told me the Gnome was like a home away from home, a living room you could get a drink in. I liked that and I had no intention of destroying it. My life had been pretty miserable before this happened, I'd been handed a golden opportunity and I wasn't about to destroy it.
I patted the statue at the bar as Douglas unlocked the front door. Immediately, a small influx of people entered and occupied the various tables and barstools dotted around, Doug had done a great job of spreading the word.
A disheveled-looking elderly man wearing a beanie hat sat at the barstool closest to the statue of the gnome and huffed loudly. He was unshaven and had tufts of hair sticking out of his hat but despite his appearance, there was a huge grin on his face.
"Oh Grebbles, how I've missed you mate!" he boomed, staring lovingly at the gnome he had since picked up off the bar.
Douglas emerged from out of the back instantly at the sound of the gentleman's voice.
"Jimmy! Good to see you back in position," he exclaimed, shaking the man's hand vigorously from across the bar. "How have you been?"
"Well, not bad, Doug, but I've been losing my marbles trapped inside all that time. Still gutted about our Darl as well." Jimmy paused with a sadness and side-eyed me. "Aren't you going to introduce me to our new landlady?"
Douglas slapped his hand onto my shoulder and pulled me closer.
"Of course, how rude of me! Jimmy, this is Carmilla, Darlene's niece and the new owner of the gnome." He turned to face me as Jimmy continued to give me the side eye. "Carmilla, this is Jimmy, practically lives here. Don't worry, he'll warm up to you, I think he was expecting Darl to leave the place to him as he's here so often." He burst into ferocious laughter and I smiled nervously as I realized I'd just inherited an entire community of people who might not be so welcoming.
"Nice to meet you," I managed. I kicked myself, landladies were supposed to be charismatic but I could barely say hello.
"I didn't know Darl had a niece," Jimmy said flatly, the tufty whiskers around his mouth bouncing as he spoke.
"I didn't know I had an aunt," I answered.
"Well, it's nice to meet you, Camilla," Jimmy responded, sounding as genuine as a vegan ordering a t-bone steak.
"It's Carmilla. Who's Grebbles?" I asked nodding at the statue and trying to change the subject. Douglas had an awkward grin on his face and I wanted to lighten the mood. Jimmy's expression finally eased as he stroked the drunken-looking statue with his grubby fingertips.
"Ahh, Grebbles here is my best friend Camilla." I winced as he got my name wrong again but I didn't bother to correct him, he was less sour-looking and I preferred to count my blessings. "We've seen many an adventure together... lock-ins... invasions... that time the rabid fox tried to eat Jessica Polchester in the corner over there and our Douglas..."
Douglas cut him off by slamming a shot of whiskey down in front of him and coughing.
"Come on, Jimmy, plenty of time to reminisce, but let's toast to the reopening of the Gnome first shall we?"
I wanted to know more, the rabid fox story sounded interesting, but Douglas went to a great deal of effort to stop Jimmy talking. He placed a shot glass in front of me and one in front of him and lined up 20 more on the bar.
"Say something, Carmilla. Give them a little opening speech!" He grinned at me. I detested public speaking with every fiber of my being and couldn't imagine a worse request, but just over Doug's shoulder was a photograph of Aunt Darlene I'd hung behind the bar. I may have never met her but feeling like I belonged to a family for the first time in my life gave me a weird sense of responsibility. I didn't want to let her down.
I panicked a little before finally grabbing a plastic jug from under the bar and banging it against the chipped mahogany worktop. The rumblings of conversation stopped and the entire room focused on me.
"Welcome!" I shouted. It was a weak start but I had no idea what I was doing. "If you'd have told me this time three months ago, I'd be running a pub in the city I'd have laughed at you... To be honest, I still laugh at the idea of it now. I never knew my Aunt Darlene, but she chose me to take over this place and I want to do her proud.
"I hope to get to know you all over a drink and an interesting story, but for now I want to propose a toast. To the Pickled Gnome, my Aunt Darlene, and a lifetime of great nights drinking!" With that, I raised my shot glass and knocked it back, feeling the burn as what I suspected was very strong vodka hit the back of my throat.
The crowd clapped and cheered before knocking back the shots that Douglas had handed out as I spoke. I looked at him for approval as I started to pull pints and he gave me a reassuring nod. I seemed to have gotten off to a good start. Even Jimmy was pleasant as the evening progressed.
It was a busy evening, there wasn't a barstool free all night, and as my first night in hospitality it was an initiation by fire, but I loved it. Customers shared stories of my aunt with me and times they'd spent in the Gnome. They made me feel welcome, like I was a part of the community already.
About 10 o'clock, a man and his wife walked in. My new friend Jimmy informed me their names were Phil and Sheila Moorcroft and they lived in one of the houses opposite the pub. He said they could be difficult occasionally. Regardless, he called them over to introduce me and they seemed like lovely, warm, and kind people. His assessment appeared to be unfounded.
Sheila was at the bar, telling me how much I reminded her of Darl and what good friends they'd been. She looked emotional as she sipped her gin and tonic and looked at the photograph behind me.
When Phil slipped off to the toilet her demeanor changed. She tearfully told me that they had been fighting that night. She suspected that he was cheating with a lady called Jessica. I felt bad that she didn't have my full attention but her saying that reminded me that I really needed to ask Jimmy about that fox.
She got more and more distressed as she told me about her situation. I found it uncomfortable, having a practical stranger spill their deepest problems to me. All whilst Jimmy sat next to next to her, Grebbles in front of him, listening to the entire tale.
I could see her husband making his way through the people littered across the pub back to us. I worried about Sheila's ability to hold it in. I was right to worry.
Just as Phil reached the bar, Jimmy looked me dead in the eye.
"Buckle up," he said with a sigh, and for the first time the whole night, he left his chair and went to join a group of older men playing cards at an already packed booth.
Within minutes, Shiela was screaming. People tried to pay no attention but they couldn't help themselves, there was a live soap opera happening at the bar.
She screamed about Jessica. How she apparently smelled "that slut's" perfume the other day when she got home from work. That she'd seen messages between the pair. Phil ferociously denied the allegations.
I asked Douglas if I should break it up, or ask them to go outside. He looked at me with a sincere expression on his face and told me, "You need to back away and let them run their course. They're all regulars in here, don't worry, this happens a lot. The other customers will understand."
I didn't get it. The Moorcrofts seemed like a perfectly reasonable married couple, I was sure if I just spoke to them...
CRASH
I didn't get the chance to finish wondering why Douglas seemed almost frightened to get involved, or why Jimmy had walked away and the other customers had all managed to inconspicuously create a 2 to 3 meter distance between themselves and the couple.
Sheila answered my question as she picked up a large shard of the glass she had just smashed across her husband's face and my pub floor. Before I had a chance to react, or even to blink, she was drawing the sharp edge of the shard across her husband's throat as he desperately tried to push her away.
Phil was much bigger than Sheila. He should have been able to fend her off easily but she seemed to have gone into a superhuman rage. She clawed at the wound she created with her fingernails, still sobbing and wailing about a Jessica.
I stood in complete shock and horror at what I had just witnessed. Sheila's eyes were blackened with smudged mascara as her now-dead husband bled out in my pub.
My pub.
My mind began to race, what on Earth was I going to do? It took me a moment of panicking to realize that no one looked anywhere near as distressed as I was by the scene.
Jimmy was sat at the booth with the other men, looking at the dead body on the floor with a vague disgust on his face as he shuffled the pack of cards again casually. Douglas had made his way out there and put his hands on Sheila's shoulder to stand her up and take her away from the scene.
As he walked her to a seat at the end of the bar, she passed me and looked at me with tears still in her eyes.
"I'm sorry about the mess, love. I didn't want to make such a bad impression on your first night. Please forgive me."
I didn't think my jaw could get any lower until I turned to see a customer with Phil's hand in his, helping him up off the floor. He looked wobbly, and was clutching his neck. But he stood. When he finally took his hand away I saw that the wound itself had disappeared entirely, leaving just the blood behind. No scratches or cuts on his face, not even a piece of embedded glass.
Douglas continued to serve drinks as I stood at the bar, catatonic. Phil joined his wife in the corner and after a quiet and inaudible discussion, they made their way out of the pub. I faintly heard Douglas making a last call in the background and continued to just stand, staring at the pool of blood all these people were delicately avoiding.
The last stragglers drank up and left. A few gave me reassuring words as they left. "You did great." "Darl would be proud." "You'll get used to it, don't worry!" They all flew over my head.
Jimmy's friends had left but he returned to his position next to Grebbles and remained there as Douglas locked the door.
"That muppet didn't tell you anything, did he?" Jimmy spat, giving Doug a far more nasty look than the one I'd received when we first met.
"Tell me what? Why is that man not dead?" It was the first I'd spoken since the incident. My words were hoarse and strained and I could see the pity in Jimmy's eyes as he looked at me.
"I didn't want her to run a mile, Jimmy. Darl picked her and she's our best chance of it not going to auction. I didn't think something like that would happen on the first night," Douglas chimed in, a heavy guilt in his words.
"You think she won't run a mile now?! You daft man..." Jimmy retaliated.
"Please, can someone just tell me what's going on? I'm right here," I begged, still struggling to pick my bottom jaw up enough to speak but bothered enough by them talking as if I wasn't in the room. Douglas looked sheepish, Jimmy sighed again, something he did a lot of, and started to speak.
"This place ain't normal, Camilla. Those who drink here tend to have something a little different about them, or they don't mind those who do.
"The Moorcrofts are harmless. Just got a bit of a need for the dramatics. Phil's not cheating, but he is an asshole and Sheila's a drunk with trust issues, makes for some huge blowouts.
"As fair warning, the Moorcrofts aren't the Gnome's only unique regulars. Not all of them will get their throat slit and get up off the floor ten minutes later, but some might try to get in your stores through gaps in the door frames or grow sharp claws on a Thursday night that pierce all your glasses. Best to use disposables on Thursdays, you'll thank me later.
"Anyway. You'll see. That is if you decide to stay. Darl was very accepting, she made us all feel welcome, no matter how unique. She must have thought you'd be good for this place." I tried to take in what Jimmy was saying but I couldn't. I had wondered about the sealant on the cellar door's frame though, I'd presumed it was pest-proofing but now I wasn't so sure.
"How could she think that when we never even met? She didn't know me," I answered, feeling emotionally overwhelmed by the whole situation.
"And you didn't know her. She chose you for a reason, I promise. But if you wanna leave... we get it." He scowled at Douglas one more time and finished up his drink, looking resigned.
Thoughts whizzed around my mind. Phil's dead body on the floor. Aunt Darlene's photo. That fucking peeling magnolia bedsit wall. Jimmy got up and made his way toward the door.
"I'll stay," I broke the silence in the room. Jimmy turned and smiled, Douglas looked relieved, his face had gone from pale to ruddy again. "But you have to help me clean that up," I finished, staring at the pool of blood still very present in the middle of the floor.
Douglas grabbed the mop from out back and some cleaning products from under the bar and I started to sweep away the excess glass, the ends of my broom smearing the blood like paint.
I turned to Jimmy.
"So. That rabid fox?"
It came with some issues.
My first few months at The Pickled Gnome were excellent. My life had become so much more than I ever thought it would be. I had fun with my customers, enjoyed my living space and the city, and even Cheeses seemed happier.
In 3 months I witnessed Phil die at least 8 times. Jimmy told me that was a good run and the Moorcrofts seemed happier than ever. It made me dread what could be considered as a bad run.
Cheeses really took to Sheila. The cat would trot through the pub to take a space on her lap and hiss at Phil. I felt sorry for the poor man, he was never anything but nice to me. He even helped me clean his brains off the pumps when Sheila battered him to death with Grebbles, couldn't be more apologetic if he tried.
I got to know all of our regulars and how to deal with some of the more unique ones.
Mrs. Turner, for example, loved to drink but god help you if you let her have more than 6. Something about that 7th drink would turn her into a complete demon. She frightened the life out of poor old Michael when she bit the head off that bird in the garden, poor little thing didn't stand a chance; I found Cheeses playing with the bottom half the next day. Douglas and I took to using a tally chart for her, we make a mark for every drink we serve her, it works.
As the months went by business got better and better. Eventually, I had to employ another staff member to work the bar with me and Douglas, so Natalie came along.
Natalie had just turned 18 and was nervous of everything. I gave her a far more thorough induction than Douglas gave me but I think the first time she witnessed Phil sprawled over the bar with a high heel sticking out of his neck she was traumatized.
She proved useful though. She'd grown up in the area in a tower block down the street and she knew quite a few of the guys. They all couldn't believe how big little Natalie had got and would ask about her grandma who raised her. Natalie still lived in the block with her and spent her time working and caring. It made me sad that she never seemed to go out with friends her age. So I tried to go easy on her when I could.
I knew she was a keeper when one of our older gentlemen, Mr. Prentice, took a funny turn and locked himself in the disabled toilet for 3 hours. When he started making disturbing, animalistic noises I instructed Douglas to open the door. Natalie insisted we didn't. Mr. Prentice lived in her block and she was very clear that it was best not to disturb him.
When Mr. Prentice finally emerged, he came up to the bar with his walking stick and small bag of shopping and apologized. He said that he usually makes it home in time when he's feeling a little off but the Gnome made him feel so comfortable he stayed longer than he should have.
He offered to pay for any cleanup and I declined. I couldn't take his money, he reminded me of the grandad I'd always wished I had. He had such kind eyes. And honestly, how much mess could he make?
I regretted my complacency when I inspected the damage. There was poop everywhere; up the walls, on the ceiling, and even in the sink. The most troubling part of it was the inside of the door was covered in deep, impossibly large claw marks. The frail old man who had just left couldn't possibly have done that. Who knows what might have happened if we'd opened that door.
I didn't have Mr. Prentice pegged as a unique regular, but I learned that day that you don't ever know who or what you're really talking to. I just knew that for the most part, my customers were harmless.
Natalie reveled in her small victory, but she was back to her jumpy self in no time when a strange visitor entered the Gnome later that night.
I didn't recognize him, and over the previous months, I'd learned that we don't tend to get many newbies at the Gnome. I welcome them, of course, but the majority of my customers are repeat. I wasn't too concerned until I saw Jimmy leave his barstool as the man approached the bar.
I'd come to learn that Jimmy only tended to leave his position when he felt threatened or thought there was going to be trouble, he would wander over to the largest group and join them. I think being part of a pack made him feel safer. Aside from home time, I'd only seen him move a handful of occasions. To be honest, I don't know if Jimmy even urinated, nothing would surprise me.
The newcomer approached the chipped mahogany worktop, he wore a jacket with the hood up and had his arms pulled up into his sleeves. I watched as a thin pale hand extended out from one of them over the bar and placed a few coins in front of me.
"You must be the new manageress. My name is Kain, Darlene and I had a prior agreement I was hoping to continue. Could we discuss over a large red wine... please?" He spoke with a constant sense of mystery in his voice, as if he was narrating a ghost show, or was going to present me with a deal the likes of Rumplestiltskin would wince at. He practically spat the word please as if it left a bad taste in his mouth. It really put me on edge.
"Nice to meet you, Kain, my name's Carmilla. If you could just excuse me for a moment please." I didn't give him an option, I left his coins where they were and went out the back, leaving Natalie to man the bar whilst I went to find Douglas.
Douglas was arguing with a particularly slender woman when I found him at the entrance to the stores. The lady looked at me sheepishly and ran through to the bar.
"One of those flat people?" I asked, gesturing to the minuscule gap surrounding the door. Douglas nodded and laughed. I didn't have time to ask about it, I jumped straight in.
"Do you know about Aunt Darlene's deal with a man called Kain?"
Douglas's face dropped. He looked like all the blood had rushed from his cheeks straight down into his feet.
"I was hoping he'd let that go when Darl died. I should have warned you, I was just hopeful... I'm sorry Carm, I really am."
He spoke so gravely I started to panic.
"What do you mean? What does he want?"
"Kain holds a meeting in the Gnome on the 3rd Wednesday of every month for his weird friends. Darlene loved him at first; he paid on time, they always bought drinks, and he was polite.
"Things changed when Darl found out what they were meeting about. They had always demanded strict privacy, but she thought she'd heard the door go and was expecting a delivery so she came downstairs to the backdoor and overheard the content of their meeting.
"Darl told us that Kain and his group were Cloaks, people who help others commit and cover up crime and evade punishment. They weren't aiding and abetting minor crimes though, they were the worst of the worst. Rapists, murderers, and worse use this group to find victims to escape the law.
"Naturally, Darl confronted him, kicked the group out of the Gnome, and threatened to contact the authorities.." I interrupted. "Just like I'm about to do, too! I won't have a person like that under my roof!" I started to storm back to the bar, ready to get rid of Kain, but Douglas grabbed me in protest.
"Stop! You didn't know your aunt but, damn it, are you stubborn like her sometimes. Kain isn't a person. He's a monster. Darl would never have let him walk free if she had a choice." I felt my heart drop into my stomach. We were surrounded by the unusual and things people would find traditionally scary, it was our normal. To hear Douglas refer to Kain as a monster truly scared me.
"How did he take away her choice?"
Douglas opened his mouth to answer, but the words never made it out. There was an eruption of shouting and commotion from the bar followed by a shrill scream.
"Natalie!" Douglas ran toward the door and I followed.
Inside was carnage. The first face I was confronted with was Sheila's, mascara tears running down her face. There was no comforting dead Phil that followed her though. Instead was a room full of terrified punters.
"Carm..." Natalie wheezed from her position standing on top of the bar.
Kain was sat calmly in front of her with a large glass of red wine in his hand. He had taken his hood down and I could clearly see his gleeful expression as my bartender danced for him, limbs broken-looking and contorted like a marionette.
Natalie looked like she was in so much pain, the positions her body parts moved into as she danced were so unnatural. The more pain she showed, the more ecstatic Kain became. She clearly had no control over her movements, and his abilities terrified me.
Finally, after what felt like an eternity, he dropped her and I watched as she collapsed, cracking her ankle as she slipped off the bar and into the tower of glasses behind her.
He turned to me and then to Douglas and smirked.
"I see you've been catching up on who I am. I suppose there's no need to explain the arrangement to you. Shame really, I thought we could be civil. I'm sure Brainless here filled you in on all the information.
"My group will be meeting here next Wednesday at 5 pm. The pub will be closed for 3 hours while we meet and that will continue on a monthly basis. You do not want to find out what happens if that doesn't happen."
I wanted to scream, to do anything I could to stop this from happening but I could still hear Natalie whimpering on the floor, and I couldn't bring myself to risk it. I'd been blindsided.
Kain was walking toward the exit as he turned to me.
"By the way, it's nice to meet you too, Carmilla. You remind me a lot of Darlene." He said it with venom, the words slithered out. He spared one last glance at Natalie, who had barely pulled herself up to stand. He chuckled smugly and stepped outside at the same time as I heard a loud crunching sound and another scream.
As the door swung the crowds of shocked customers erupted into shouting and chaos. I ran toward Natalie, whose wrist was now bent backward so far her knuckles were flapping against her arm. She was bruised, cut up from all the glass she'd smashed into, and was hyperventilating.
I tried to calm her down and started to pick the glass out but she was so distressed and she desperately needed medical attention.
Nicole, a middle-aged woman who never drank alcohol, offered to take her to the hospital by car. Natalie gratefully agreed and I told them to keep me updated the whole way. I offered a round on the house to all the shaken regulars and they eventually retreated to their respective tables and chairs, leaving me, Douglas, and Jimmy, who had returned to his spot, at the bar.
"I really hope she's okay," I voiced, totally defeated.
"That was nothing, Camilla! You have no idea what that creature is capable of!" Jimmy ranted, not taking his eyes off of Grebbles.
Douglas's face sunk.
"I didn't get to finish telling you the whole story. Darlene had no choice but to keep the Cloak's booking. Not after Iris."
I watched as a tear rolled down Douglas's cheek as he spoke. Jimmy looked equally distressed and focused so hard on that little gnome I think he was trying to block out the world around him.
"Iris was another regular here, she was young, about Natalie's age, used to come in with her parents. Everyone liked her, she was a nice girl and she brought her young friends for drinks here, but they never caused a bother and it was nice to have some young blood in the place.
"When Darl booted Kain and his followers out they came back 3 days later for revenge. Iris was unlucky, she was standing closest to the door.
"I don't know how he does it, but he can make people do things with their bodies that their mind doesn't want to. I think he leaves their awareness alone on purpose, so they feel the pain, and they always remember.
"He whispered something in Iris's ear at the entrance to the Gnome and she lost it. She walked behind the bar, grabbed a bottle of absinthe, and soaked herself in it... screaming that she didn't want to... I'm sorry... it's been a while." Douglas paused to compose himself.
"While she was burning, Kain entered and made a speech, told us all that if he or his people were not treated with some respect and given their venue back that he would annihilate each and every one of us in twisted new ways. His followers were so happy, those crazy fuckers were sniffing the air and smiling. Have you ever smelled a burning human, Carmilla? There's nothing more repulsive." Douglas knocked back a shot of whiskey and I sat in disbelief, trying to find words.
"Why hasn't anyone done anything, tried to hurt him or just do something?!" I begged.
"Darl tried," Jimmy piped up. "She made plans every month to try and stop them, end them all while they were in one place. Kain is always one step ahead. Nothing she did worked, it just made him angry. She gave up for the sake of everyone. She didn't want anyone to get hurt."
It infuriated me.
"Cowards! What about the people they're hurting anyway?! There's enough of us to overpower him surely? Fuck this. Fuck Aunt Darlene's agreement. This ends when they return."
Jimmy shook his head at my optimism and got up to leave the bar that had slowly emptied as we spoke, he didn't say a single word. Douglas started cleaning and collecting glasses silently. They didn't fill me with much confidence, but I was determined to think of a way to take Kain down.
When everything was closed and Douglas had left, I sat with Cheeses and tried to come up with a plan. Nicole texted me to tell me Natalie was going to be fine, just a cast for her wrist and lots of rest needed, the text came with a photo of Natalie, looking tearful but relieved.
I stared at the photo. I thought of Iris, Darlene, and all of the regulars I'd come to love so dearly, then the way to win finally hit me.
Some people aren't easily thrown out.
If you're new to The Pickled Gnome, welcome! Pull up a stool and try my artisanal lemonade, it's really good. I promise Jimmy only looks grumpy, but he'll be grateful for the company.
Last time we spoke I told you about Kain, his group of Cloaks, and the deal he forced my Aunt Darlene into. It made me sick thinking of what happened to Iris and I felt even worse when Natalie returned to the pub with her wrist in a splint, looking beaten.
I couldn't let the deal continue. Aside from how I abhorred the group's philosophy, they had frightened my regulars. Not acting on it would make me an awful landlady.
My plan was solid, I hoped, but I knew I couldn't do it alone. To take down someone with the strength Kain had demonstrated was going to require some help.
I approached my regulars for assistance over the course of the week, most of whom were terrified after the events in the pub during Kain's visit and turned me down swiftly.
I had an entire community full of people who could do or become extraordinary things but none of them were willing to risk their autonomy to help.
Mrs. Turner was too frightened of the things she may do under Kain's control. She couldn't be convinced by an offer of limitless drinks for the night or my promises that I would do everything possible to keep her safe.
After my conversation with her, I was disheartened. It was the same story with over 15 other people I spoke to.
Mr. Prentice even laughed at me, he couldn't understand what help I thought an old man like him would be. I tried to mention the incident with the toilet but he just looked baffled, as if he didn't remember it at all. There's no tactful way to ask someone if they're a monster.
No wonder Aunt Darl had failed to remove the Cloaks.
Jimmy and Douglas were in. To be honest, I didn't give them much choice. I threatened Jimmy with a ban from the bar and Douglas with his job. I felt terrible, realistically I wasn't going to follow through on either of those threats but by this stage, I was desperate not to be alone in my endeavor.
Natalie was a different story, her nervous demeanor had gotten worse since her attack. I tried to insist she took some paid time off but she refused, she told me she had to work to keep herself sane. She was jumpy and struggled to even collect glasses but I wasn't about to come down on her. I hadn't even asked for her help.
She offered it when she overheard me talking to Douglas about how hard a time I was having enacting my plan. I told her no a thousand times, but she was desperate to do something despite her terror.
Those three were all I had and by Tuesday we had gotten no further in our endeavors. The plan I had thought was perfect was never going to work with that few people and we were about to get royally fucked by Kain. So I took to drastic measures.
I told the patrons of the Gnome the day I opened that I wasn't a public speaker, so for me to stand on the bar itself and beg for their help was huge.
"Hi, everyone. As you all know we have a customer here at the Gnome that we're struggling to remove from the premises.
"I want to keep you all safe, but I can't do that without your help and if you all want to continue drinking here then I suggest you get involved!" I thought I'd made a great speech but I'd never seen a pub clear as quickly as that. These people were scared.
My plea for help acted like a last call, the majority drank up and got up. It was only early in the evening so I knew it signified a lack of faith in me, but a few remained.
Phil and Sheila didn't disappoint me and I was grateful to see them still sitting there, their talents were going to be particularly useful.
"I don't think there's much he can do to me... not that the wife hasn't already," Phil joked to break the silence, making a through-cutting motion with his finger and twitching his head in his wife's direction. Jimmy laughed and Sheila gave him daggers, but with Cheeses firmly anchored on her lap and I don't think Sheila wanted to disturb her by getting up.
Another lady sat across the bar next to Natalie. I knew her name was Tiffany, but we hadn't interacted a lot.
"Thanks for being here," I said handing her a vodka lemonade, her usual drink, and the only other thing I knew about her.
"I wouldn't miss it," she started, tears in her eyes. "Iris was my best friend. What that monster did to her..." Her voice broke as she tried to find the words and the only other customer to remain threw his arm around her shoulders.
Quentin was a daily visitor of the Gnome. He never stayed for long and would pop in on his route home from his job as a road sweeper. He was always dressed in his high-vis gear and this occasion was no different. Tiffany was a very glamorous young girl but despite Quentin's grubby work gear, she looked grateful for the comfort. He tried to change the subject.
"I stayed because those fuckers always made it so I couldn't get a drink on a Wednesday. Ruined the whole day. Fuck those guys." I think that was the most I'd ever heard him speak.
I didn't know if Quentin or Tiffany were standard regulars or not and I didn't want to pry, I just really hoped they could hold their own.
We strategized over drinks for hours and after many a useless suggestion, mostly from Douglas, we finally settled on a course of action.
I was going to be in the apartment upstairs alone when they entered, to make them feel as if they'd won. Then Phil would enter as our bait a while into their meeting. He was going to try and incense the whole group to bring their focus onto him. He intended to look like a rogue, protesting alone.
Sheila was insistent that after he had their attention, she would go in.
"Nothing makes me as angry as Phil... except for people hurting Phil," she said, convinced that their reaction to him would cause her superhuman rage to kick in.
I pointed out the issues; that Kain could take control of her, use her rage against the rest of us. Which is where Tiffany came in. She had been quiet throughout the conversation and she winced every time Kain was mentioned but after hearing Sheila's intentions she finally piped up.
"No. I go in after Phil," she said gravely.
"Why would you do that?" Sheila spat at her across the bar. I could see the insane jealousy bubbling inside her. Luckily Douglas had spotted that, too.
"Not the time, Sheila!" he shouted at her from his seat. She did back down, and let Tiffany speak.
"I have the best chance of resisting him," she said flatly. After a moment of silence, she could sense the confusion on our faces and continued. "He's not the only person who can do things. Watch."
Tiffany took a step back from the rest of us and stood with her arms on either side of her, palms facing us. She closed her eyes and in less than a blink had vanished entirely.
"What the fuck..." I heard come from Jimmy, someone who is rarely shocked.
"He can't control me if he can't see me," came Tiffany's voice from thin air. "I can come in behind Phil, while Kain is using him like some plaything I can find the right position and kill him."
I felt something hit the back of my neck and I turned around to see Tiffany, standing behind me, meters away from where she had vanished. Her words made me uncomfortable.
"I'm not so sure about killing..." I started, but Quentin interrupted me.
"You have no idea how many people they've killed; and how many that survived wished they'd been killed. If anyone deserves it, it's them."
"Iris didn't want to die, we were going to go to Amsterdam that year," Tiffany added from behind me.
Natalie looked at me from across the room. Since the incident, she'd had a look of despair in her eyes that I couldn't get out of my mind. She just looked so broken and those eyes were boring into my soul. The idea of killing made me uncomfortable, but I doubted I was as uncomfortable as Natalie, strung up like a marionette puppet on the bar.
I knew they were right. There was no way to do this without a death, not counting Phil, of course. I thought of all their victims, too, and how much I wanted to help them.
We finalized details and planned for Phil to enter the pub 15 minutes into their meeting to kick things off, the rest of them would arrive in the garden out back as Phil entered.
We had one last drink together and they started to venture home, leaving just me and Douglas to clean up. Natalie walked home with Tiffany, so that she wouldn't be on her own.
"Carm, you know Darl tried, right?" Douglas mused as he swept the seating area. "She walked with a stick for the last two years of her life after Kain broke her leg when she called the police. He talked his way out of everything, all the evidence she gathered. It broke her, Carm, I don't want to see the same thing happen to you."
I thought of my aunt. I never knew she walked with a stick. But then, I never knew her. There was so much about her I had to learn.
"It won't, Doug. I've got all of you, Kain and his creepy friends don't stand a chance. You saw Tiffany, we won't fail... we can't." I put on a brave face, I was trying to convince myself as much as Douglas.
"I just hope you're right."
We finished up about an hour or so later and Douglas went home, leaving me to lie in bed, mind racing, with Cheeses in my lap. I tried to organize my thoughts, but they just meshed into a deafening white noise. I was amazed I heard the phone buzz at all.
There was a video attachment from an unknown number. I opened it up and it was taken a few minutes down the road from the Gnome, outside the tower block that Natalie, Mr. Prentice, and a number of my regulars lived in.
I watched Natalie arrive outside and give Tiffany a massive hug, look around, and then enter the building. Then it cut to a different shot of Natalie, this time much closer. It was taken from above her while she slept in bed.
A thin, pale hand reached out and moved a stray hair away from her face so gently I wasn't sure he even touched it. The person then turned and calmly walked out of the room before the footage cut out.
My stomach did backflips. As the video finished, I noticed a text message that had followed it. It made me want to throw up.
I can get to her any time I want. Don't try anything. See you tomorrow.
And I would do anything to protect my regulars.
My heart raced after receiving the video from Kain. I didn't bother to text him back, or give him the satisfaction. Instead, I called Natalie.
"Are you okay?!" I asked frantically.
I'd clearly woken her up and she sounded groggy. She didn't know what I was talking about. Kain was gone, it had just been a way to scare us into submission. I told Natalie what happened. I didn't want to, I knew what it would do to her, but she deserved to know the danger she was in.
"Carm, what am I supposed to do? I've got my grandmother here, she can't be hurt. What if he comes in... It was so painful last time..." I could hear her starting to hyperventilate over the phone. I had to stop her.
"Is there anyone that can stay with you? Just until tomorrow and then you come straight here. He wants me, not you, I'm so sorry, Nat." I tried to think of viable solutions, more than a few of our more special regulars lived in that block, and I know none of them would want anything to happen to her.
"I'll be okay for the night Carm. I'm gonna barricade my front door, deadbolt it, and everything. At least then I'd hear him come in. If he was going to hurt me he'd have done it then." I could tell she was trying to convince herself and she wasn't doing a great job of convincing me she was fine.
I didn't get a minute's sleep that night. Instead, I counted the stains on the bedroom ceiling multiple times. 37. I was feeling pretty disheveled and tired by the time I heard a knock at the door, I almost jumped out of my skin.
It was Natalie. She was alive, thank fuck. I gave her a massive hug and she smiled weakly.
"Is the kettle on? Just going down the stairs in the block felt like a marathon today," she huffed, hands on her thighs.
We got the tea going and sat together in the bar, it had better seating than upstairs.
"Have you worked out what you're going to do now? What's the new plan?" Natalie asked. I sighed. Staring at my ceiling counting stains hadn't given me any inspiration. I had nothing.
"The plan remains the same. I still think we can blindside them with Phil. Don't worry, I've got this under control." It was a lie.
"You're underestimating Kain and you know it." I didn't have time to respond, just tut and shake my head. Douglas was at the door, he'd brought pastries for breakfast.
"You look awful, Carm!" Wasn't the friendliest greeting I'd ever had but I couldn't argue with him.
Natalie shot me daggers as she ate her cinnamon swirl. Cheeses napped on Douglas's lap and just looking at her made my eyes feel heavy. I had no idea how I was going to stay awake to face Kain, let alone remove him.
The day passed and the clock ticked. We didn't open the pub that day, we just waited, knowing that it could very well be the end of life at The Pickled Gnome as we knew it.
Natalie's cold glare softened when we heard them enter downstairs. She went from a hardened presence that was judging me to a little girl I had to protect in minutes.
"We just have to stay here," I said, trying to keep my composure. I wondered how long it would take Phil to arrive, I could already hear tables and chairs being moved around below me. Fuck, I wasn't cut out for a leadership role here.
It didn't take long, I heard the most gut-wrenching crunch followed by shouting.
"Carmilla, I suggest you get down the stairs now!"
I froze for a moment at the sound of his voice. Had Tiffany entered yet? What about Sheila? Were my regulars all dead on the floor downstairs? How did they kill Phil this time?
"The girl and that blundering idiot, too. Hurry up!" Kain sounded impatient this time.
Natalie grabbed hold of my arm, digging her nails in so hard I'm sure I bled but the poor girl was so scared I couldn't stop her. Douglas led the way, the scene was awful.
Kain's friends had literally torn Phil apart, they'd slashed his limbs with broken glass and severed an entire arm. I gasped at the sight and the closest goon to the body booted him so hard in the face his features collapsed inward.
"I tried to warn you, Carmilla. Why have you done this to yourself? Your friends?" Kain smirked at me and raised an eyebrow, he enjoyed the game.
I surveyed the room. It was hard to take my eyes off Phil's grotesque corpse on the ground, I wasn't sure he could reattach his arm, Sheila hadn't dismembered him before. I couldn't see anyone else, but I knew that didn't mean Tiffany wasn't there.
"Please don't hurt anyone, I didn't know he was going to do this. I got the message, I promise!" I pleaded, feigning ignorance and sticking to the original plan. Sleep deprivation was getting to me and I was struggling to speak properly.
"I don't think you did. I hold the manageress responsible for any issues my group has during our booker time here so I'm afraid your weak begging won't cut it." He looked me dead in the eyes and I felt Natalie's nails dig further into my skin.
She wailed and convulsed before collapsing in agony, arms suspended in midair holding her up as if she were tied to something.
"Stop it, you monster!" Douglas screamed, making me jump.
"Please don't hurt her! Hurt me! It's me that deserves this, not her!" I added, running down the stairs toward Kain.
"I wouldn't come any closer!" he said calmly, holding his palm out toward me. I stopped. He scrunched his hand into a fist and I heard a wailing from behind me, I turned to see Natalie being hoisted off the floor by her own arms. Her feet dangled desperately until even her tiptoes couldn't reach the floor. I heard her arm click out of place as it struggled to hold her weight, watched as her joints dislocated under the strain. I'd never seen pain like it.
I turned back to Kain.
"You're evil," was all I could manage, I was in pure shock and had no words.
"And you're stupid. Hurting you wouldn't be half as fun as..." He was cut off. Literally, in fact, by a large knife that sliced into his throat. In the blink of an eye, Tiffany was visible behind him, hacking at his neck like she was possessed. Natalie hit the floor with a thud, panting with relief.
"Iris was beautiful! She was the most amazing person and you took her!" Tiffany cried as she sawed through vertebrae with an incredible strength.
The room instantly descended into chaos. I realized that the part of the plan I hadn't thought through was the bit where we would be hugely outnumbered by Kain's sociopath friends. There were more than I thought, around 10 of them.
Douglas had already been grabbed. He was being beaten viciously to the ground by two of them. I tried to run to him, but caught Natalie being manhandled by a large, vile-looking man and changed course, I knew Douglas would understand.
When I was eventually grabbed myself, I realized that we were hopeless, it was likely we were all going to die in the Gnome. The man's fingers dug into my collarbones as he dragged me across the room. Another grabbed a barstool and began to lift it, I was certain he was going to use it to end my life.
Then the door opened. The crack of dusky light was like a ray of hope that was soon blocked by Sheila's incredibly angry silhouette.
She screamed when she saw him, Phil, on the floor with his face all squashed in like that. It wasn't like the multiple times she'd killed him, it was real devastation. She let out a guttural, primal cry that hurt my soul. It stopped every inch of chaos in its tracks, no one could take their eyes off her, the man holding me even loosened his grip. She stopped for only a moment before unleashing her overwhelming anger on the room.
Sheila was a small woman, only about 5'4" in heels, but she could attack more violently than any man I'd ever seen. She was the true human incarnation of rage. She ripped through the room, blood spraying in her path. Quentin had come in behind her and was battering the attackers with a broom, a satisfied look on his face. They would've eaten him alive if he hadn't been with Sheila.
The bodies began to pile up, it wasn't long before she'd reached me and ripped the face off of the man who had been holding me, flaps of his cheeks littered the floor.
Sheila finally made it to Tiffany, who wasn't moving on the floor after a violent beating by two of Kain's goons, next to their decapitated leader. She reached out toward one and dug her thumbs into his eye sockets. Individually, they started to bleed. You expect eyeballs to come out easy, but they don't, there's a lot of mess first.
As she turned to attack the last remaining follower he reached into his pocket and pulled out a gun. It stopped Sheila in her tracks.
I felt woozy, no amount of rage was going to make Sheila bulletproof and no amount of strange antics in the pub could have prepared me for this slaughter.
"Stop! Please just go! No one else needs to die!" I screamed.
"Oh! Now you want to be peaceful because I have a gun, right? Well, that isn't going to work. All my friends are dead, you're coming with us you fuc-"
Thud. He hit the floor.
Have you ever seen an old friend and felt warm inside, like everything in the world was okay?
That's how I felt when I saw Grebbles, coming toward the gunman's head with quite the velocity. I had wondered where Jimmy had been all this time, I don't know how long he'd been under the bar for but I'd never felt warmer inside. He'd chastised me for even attempting to stop Kain but in the end, he was there for us.
Sheila grabbed hold of the gun from next to the unconscious man and shot him 3 times in the face. She didn't stop to stare, she dropped it instantly and ran to Phil's mangled corpse and sobbed.
I surveyed the pub, the bodies everywhere, and my friends. Trying to pick up the pieces. Douglas was comforting Natalie while she cried into his arms.
Jimmy stood with Sheila, desperately trying to wake Phil. It may sound sick, but he'd never looked more dead before.
In the corner was Quentin, standing over Tiffany. I ran to them, I wanted to try and help, to get her up so we could get her to the hospital but as soon as I saw her I knew. It was too late. She was gone. I looked at Quentin and pulled him close for a hug.
As tears streamed down my face I could see the front outline of someone standing up. It was Phil.
His features were no longer sunken in and disfigured, but he looked far more disheveled than usual, and he was noticeably still missing an arm.
"You're alive!" Sheila screamed.
"Of course, I am, honey, you've tried harder than they did before." He chucked awkwardly. "I'm not sure I'll get that appendage back though." He pointed to his severed arm with the one that remained. He tugged at the sleeve of his shirt to reveal a perfectly healed stump.
I smiled a little; amongst the chaos, there was some normality but my moment of peace was bittersweet. I was instantly reminded of Tiffany.
There was nothing any of us could do. We tried CPR and everything but she had stopped breathing, there was no heartbeat.
"Her parents knew about her special talents, they were there when Iris... They deserve to know the truth," Quentin suggested after a long bout of silence amongst the group. He tried to be strong but his voice cracked as he fought tears.
"We'll come with you. Let's take her home," Sheila answered him softly, putting an arm around his shoulders. She had gone from killing machine to someone who was gentle and maternal.
We all helped wrap Tiffany in bedsheets, I made sure they were clean ones, it felt more respectful, and then load her into the back of Quentin's council van. He only ever had one pint at the end of work so often parked the van outside.
When they drove away there was a void. Everyone left in the pub could feel the pangs of loss. Natalie was lying in a booth recovering. The damage to her arms wasn't as bad as I had initially thought, Tiffany had stopped Kain in time. The endurance of the human body is amazing and Natalie was one tough cookie.
Douglas was cleaning. It's what he did after any event he found stressful. Jimmy stopped him.
"There's no point mopping, Doug. We need to get rid of the bodies."
Fuck. Another thing I hadn't thought of.
"I know how," came a feeble voice. Natalie hoisted herself up. "But you need to cut them up first."
Jimmy didn't question her.
"Come on, Doug, as the lady says." He grabbed Douglas by the arm and they started moving the bodies into the cellar.
Once they were all gone I grabbed the mop that Douglas had gotten out and started to clean the Gnome. I wasn't about to let all the sacrifice be for nothing. We were going to open the next day and have drinks for Tiffany. I focused so hard on removing every drop of blood that my vision started to blur.
"Carm, you need to sleep," Natalie commanded from her booth.
"No, Nat, I can't. This was all my fault, I have to do something," I answered, scrubbing at Grebbles who Jimmy had left safely on the bar.
"Tiffany knew the risk. We all did. You should be proud, you had the balls to stop them. Think about all the people you've saved tonight, all those victims they were trafficking." I tried to take in her words but I couldn't, my mind had shut down.
I carried on cleaning. Eventually, Jimmy and Douglas surfaced. About 11 pm, Natalie weakly stood up. She insisted she needed to get the dismembered parts home, she said she could dispose of them in her block once it reached 1.11 am. This raised a huge amount of questions that I wasn't sure I wanted to know the answers to, so I decided not to ask.
Douglas loaded up his car and helped Natalie into the passenger seat. The Gnome was clean, the bodies were gone, but it still felt like a different place, like Kain had ripped the soul from it.
Jimmy checked I was going to be okay and made his way home. I locked the doors and made my way upstairs where I lay in my bed cuddled up with Cheeses. My mind raced but eventually sleep deprivation got the better of me and I crashed.
I woke up the next morning unsure how I felt. I realized my idea to hold drinks for Tiffany may have been a bit soon but I was determined to get the place up and running. Douglas arrived and made tea around noon. It was refreshing to see him.
I asked if he'd heard from Natalie and he said he'd spoken to her that morning and everything had gone smoothly. I considered asking about her methods again, but decided it was better I never knew.
We prepped the bar and things started to feel almost normal. Opening the doors was a release. Jimmy was in position within minutes and Phil and Sheila were at a table telling some other regulars about Phil's lack of an arm.
Maybe the Gnome was going to be ok. I was feeling hopeful.
"Camilla," Jimmy stopped me between pouring pints. He still never got my name right.
"Larger?" I asked, almost smiling.
"No... well, yes... but... I need to tell you something." My heart sank.
"What?"
"When we moved the bodies..." I shushed him.
"Don't talk so loudly," I begged.
Jimmy looked around. Then he said something that sent chills up my spine.
"It's Kain, we never found his head."